Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is he cheating again?

27 replies

Sarahami · 20/11/2025 12:15

Hi all, I hope you’re okay. I just don’t know what to do. And my biggest regret is forgiving a cheater and trying to make it work. A lot has happened last year. But I suspect his cheating again. So basically after his cheating last year, we said we will try again and for a while he did better. But now that I’m pregnant I just truly believe his here for convenience. I don’t think he loves or likes me in the slightest. He agreed to delete all socials but Facebook which I said okay. But recently I realised when his in bed his not active on Facebook but if he hears me I can hear him moving quickly and all of a sudden his active on Facebook. His up to something again isn’t he? I’ve also noticed from his old phone google activity that’s linked to both of his phone it says at the same time “used” basically any social media app at “14.06” then it says google play store and the name of the phone he has. But during that time it says his been all the apps like instagram, what’s app, snap. So strange. I know I’m a mug. I know this relationship won’t work.

OP posts:
Bestluck · 20/11/2025 12:20

Yes he is

This time u unfortunately you’re pregnant

start planning

Bestluck · 20/11/2025 12:21

And you already have children with him?

Sarahami · 20/11/2025 12:30

I already have 3 children with him and pregnant again. I feel it in my guts too that he is up to something. And I am planning.

OP posts:
RelationshipTherapist2 · 20/11/2025 12:43

I'm sorry to hear about this.

From what you've said, it's not necessarily about whether he's cheating or not, but from the forensic analysis of his social media activity, it sounds like the trust is gone.

Do you want to be with someone you can't trust?

Your answer to that question tells you everything you need to know about whether to stay in the relationship or not.

Wishing you all the best.

Sarahami · 20/11/2025 13:14

Thank you, and no I don’t want to be with him at all. I feel stuck. I got pregnant again. It wasn’t planned. I genuinely thought he may change but he won’t. His google activity I did trust because I don’t trust him. And it’s just weird it comes up with that and then when I search what it means it says two different things I’m not an android user so I don’t understand it. So some results say it means he used instagram at this time and some say ther maybe an update in the back ground even if you don’t have these apps on your phone. So very confusing. Even chat gpt confused me lol x

OP posts:
IwishIhadcheese · 20/11/2025 13:24

I couldn’t live like this.

pinkyredrose · 20/11/2025 13:29

You can't trust him, you need to leave. Sorry Op, he's a wrong 'un.

RelationshipTherapist2 · 20/11/2025 13:45

I would suggest spending less time and energy analysing his social media use and more time trying to plan how to leave. You're just driving yourself mad trying to figure him out, but as you say, you already know the truth, so why waste time searching for extra proof.

Many people leave a relationship despite being pregnant, and I'm sure people here will have plenty of practical suggestions to help you navigate leaving.

But in the meantime, give your mind a much-needed rest, breathe, and know that you deserve so much better.

Starlight1984 · 20/11/2025 13:47

So he cheated on you 12 months ago and you decided the best thing to do was to get pregnant again?

HoppingPavlova · 20/11/2025 13:49

Leopards never change their spots.

Abracadabrador · 20/11/2025 13:51

Is he just a boyfriend or are you married? Do you own your own property?

Do you have anyone to help you with parenting 4 kids? Hopefully the cheater will co-parent properly.

Starlight1984 · 20/11/2025 13:52

OP I have just read your other posts. Not only did he cheat on you in October last year but he also walked out on you and your 4 (not 3) children in March this year.

At what point did you become pregnant to him again?!?!

Bestluck · 20/11/2025 14:10

Starlight1984 · 20/11/2025 13:52

OP I have just read your other posts. Not only did he cheat on you in October last year but he also walked out on you and your 4 (not 3) children in March this year.

At what point did you become pregnant to him again?!?!

Oh this is depressing

3luckystars · 20/11/2025 14:12

I hope you will be ok

RescueMeFromThisSilliness · 20/11/2025 14:19

Starlight1984 · 20/11/2025 13:47

So he cheated on you 12 months ago and you decided the best thing to do was to get pregnant again?

The OP says it wasn't planned.

Anything else you'd like to give her a hard time about while you're at it?

Starlight1984 · 20/11/2025 14:24

RescueMeFromThisSilliness · 20/11/2025 14:19

The OP says it wasn't planned.

Anything else you'd like to give her a hard time about while you're at it?

Oh come off it...

Although to be honest, after he cheated on her in October and then walked out on her and her kids in March (after she'd taken him back once), why on earth she would be having sex AT ALL with this man I really don't know.

Sarahami · 20/11/2025 16:40

Starlight1984 · 20/11/2025 14:24

Oh come off it...

Although to be honest, after he cheated on her in October and then walked out on her and her kids in March (after she'd taken him back once), why on earth she would be having sex AT ALL with this man I really don't know.

Let’s hope you never go through something like and be trauma bonded to the only person you ever been with. What ever happened to supporting each other and being kind. If you don’t like my post don’t comment. Your opinion is not needed here. And thank you to everyone else who actually is giving the advice to plan to leave. Sometimes in life woman go and back and forth. I realise now that I didn’t then staying with a man for the sake of my kids doesn’t keep me him or the kids happy. We all grow and learn and make mistakes. Talk about kicking a dog when it’s down. Karma is real hun.

OP posts:
Sarahami · 20/11/2025 16:42

RelationshipTherapist2 · 20/11/2025 13:45

I would suggest spending less time and energy analysing his social media use and more time trying to plan how to leave. You're just driving yourself mad trying to figure him out, but as you say, you already know the truth, so why waste time searching for extra proof.

Many people leave a relationship despite being pregnant, and I'm sure people here will have plenty of practical suggestions to help you navigate leaving.

But in the meantime, give your mind a much-needed rest, breathe, and know that you deserve so much better.

You’re so right and this is what I’m going to do. I just feel so hopeless and think about the finance and my kids have a good life with their dad. But I’m not happy. I have tried to forgive him. But I don’t think I can. Someone said to me it took her 5 years to leave. I don’t want to be that person. I am planning, I am saving. Working hard. And when the time feels right I will leave. I keep worrying about the distress it will cause my unborn baby. I’m so conflicted.

OP posts:
Sarahami · 21/11/2025 22:18

Update; I told him I can’t bring myself to fully forgive him and his left. I feel stronger than what I use to.

OP posts:
Merseymum1980 · 22/11/2025 15:32

Sarahami · 21/11/2025 22:18

Update; I told him I can’t bring myself to fully forgive him and his left. I feel stronger than what I use to.

Very proud of you.
How did he react

CatzAndDogs · 22/11/2025 20:36

Sarahami · 21/11/2025 22:18

Update; I told him I can’t bring myself to fully forgive him and his left. I feel stronger than what I use to.

Good for you. Stay strong. You know in your heart what is best for you now, no matter what has happened in the past.

Weenurse · 22/11/2025 20:51

Well done. Start planning your life with out him.

Oddities1 · 22/11/2025 20:59

Can you still have an abortion? You certainly don't need any need more of his children! Horrific for the three you already have

Optimist2020 · 22/11/2025 21:50

Hopefully you won’t take him back @Sarahami as you will be vulnerable parenting 4 children on your own. A woman from my mums church had 6 kids in 6 years with a man who repeatedly had affairs. Some women are just vulnerable and naive - hope this won’t be you x

summitfever · 23/11/2025 09:18

Well done op, all your children including the baby will be much better off with a mum who isn’t having all her energy drained by a nasty bastard. This is the right thing, just concentrate on standing firm!