The only time I hate being single!

[MargotMoon]

No, it’s not Christmas or Valentine’s Day or my birthday.

It’s not when I’m at weddings or parties or on holiday with friends in couples.

The only time I really, truly wish I had a man around is when my house breaks and I don’t know how to fix it. I’m tired of tradesmen fobbing me off or ripping me off. If I wanted to guess what the problem was and not fix it properly I can do that myself for free. Just turn up, don’t be prick and make it stop raining inside my house, please. And I’ll smile and be grateful and pay you a fair price.

When do you hate being single?

When I have to clear up the dead birds and rodents my cat leaves at the back door. 🤮

Definitely Christmas for me. Will be 11 years this year and I feel like I really don’t enjoy Christmas anymore 🙈 so I just get through the days and carry on.

DIY in some aspects, I can paint and put wardrobes etc together - if it involves water or electrics though I’m out 🤣

ChatGPT is pretty good for DIY jobs. You can upload a photo and it will talk you through what to buy and the steps you need to take. I mean I probably wouldn’t tackle a whole roof on this basis but definitely minor issues.

You can do that stuff yourself - I do! Only time I ever feel lonely is those moments when I wake up on my birthday, but that's a few minutes a year.

The reason I hate being single is when I look at all the subs and handouts people with children are getting out of my tax money simply because they have chosen another more selfish lifestyle. These are mostly things I dont want and cannot use such as child allowance/maternity pay/free school meals/free childcare/schools/sports centers etc. The miserable 25% discounted from my council tax does not compensate me for this. As a childfree single who always earned well (and am still working in my 80s) I am a net contributer and have a very low carbon footprint compared with all these net takers.

Christ! That’s an interesting opinion. Obviously you’ve chosen to remain single and childless your entire life, which is completely your choice, but resenting those who haven’t? Maybe your tax money that has paid for free childcare, has allowed a single mum to go to work at your dr or dentist surgery so when you call, you’re able to book an appointment? Or a single dad to go to work to collect your wheelie bins every week? Or stock the shelves in your local Tesco.
or the sports club who took on a child 30 years ago, who became fascinated ever since with how the body works, is now your surgeon when you end up in hospital. Etc etc etc.

Quite frankly, You and people like you, are the reason old people have such a bad reputation. Miser.

And before you question, I’m a teacher, married with children and not claiming benefits.

When tradesmen (and it is always the men) treat me as though I wouldn’t understand because I’m a woman. And try and either fob me off or rip me off.

When I want some chocolate and don’t want to drive to the shops just for that. 😂

And those irritating times when doing DIY and I actually do need a second pair of hands.

same here, I've got a bed go build and not enough arms to do it 😩

I employ a handyman and pay them. Usually easy enough to find on Facebook or gumtree. My current handyman is amazing.

I was going to say that you could well get paid back with lots of NHS treatment in your old age, which I have had in spades with various health issues. However, I see that you are in your 80s so I would say to you that if you are able to work and have no major health issues then you have had a very good life and very good luck. If you are able to recognise this, maybe that will help offset the feelings of injustice you feel about having had to support all these families with children for so many years.

Im not single now but when I was i used to hate being single on Sundays. In the week id be busy working and then friday/saturday would spend time with friends, nights out or whatever but Sunday always feels like a really coupley day to me and there was no one to distract me from the slightly sad "another working week starts tomorrow " feeling.

But are you assuming all men have advanced DIY skills? DH didn’t get the memo!

When I'm trying to put fake tan on my back.

I can do the DIY (YouTube is very good for things like that) but a nicely tanned back would be lovely.

If you want there to people around when you’re older eg shop workers, doctors, carers, hair dressers, then people need to have children. Other people having children will benefit you.

Being a grandparent doing sleep overs

I used to be upset by being excluded from events thrown by friends because I'm not in a couple. Then I decided it was their issue, and I don't want to be where I'm not wanted.

What a gloomy outlook.

I prop up all those on minimum wage who get it topped up by ice as greedy employers won’t pay a fair wage.

I hate the employers but not the people in receipt of uc. I’ve never claimed it in my life. I like to think we live in a compassionate not a grasping society.

Similar to your tradesmen worry - buying a new car or doing anything car related. I get my dad to come or get him to take the car to the garage!

I do find weddings where everyone is in a couple really really difficult though. Not because it makes me miserable, it’s just so awkward.

Also when I'm ill. Trying to get the child to school and back and the dog walked and everything else whilst having flu or (like last year) bloody norovirus is pure misery.

When its the weekend and I'm sat on my own. Before anyone says why not go out on your own..... I'm very shy and don't feel confident doing so. Also anything good on is a 45 minute bus ride away. So I sit, read a book instead

Same. DH can’t do anything.

I’m not single anymore, but the time I hated it was when I’d get home from a girls holiday.
There’s five of us in my friendship group and I was the only single one for a few years. We do a few girls holidays a year, a week in a Portuguese villa, European city break weekend etc.
When we’d be flying home, the girls would talk about how their boyfriend was picking them up for the airport, their fiancée was cooking their favourite meal for their return home, or their husband had suggested a takeaway and a Corrie catch up that night. And I’d be going home to an empty house, no one to share my holiday stories with or have a good catch up with.

Generally I was really happy single, but those moments always got to me, and made me feel very lonely.

Yes, being ill is another one for me!

A few years ago (and laughably, it was on Valentine’s Day) I had a sick bug and threw up in the corridor on my way to the bathroom. Feeling awful, with my cat sniffing about, i cleaned it all up, when all I wanted was to crawl into bed and have someone care for me.

Having to pay the same for a hotel room as if I was with a partner.