I fucking hate him

[Lookslikeimsinglenow]

I want to scream.
my H of 21 yrs has formed a friendship with a woman at work. I told him last year I was uncomfortable with how the friendship was forming and he assured me I was the most important thing to him and he would go no contact with her. I was left feeling content and happy. Fast forward to now, her name pops up on his phone, so naturally I asked what’s going on there. He says they’re friends and nothing more and that he doesn’t feel ‘free’ when I demand he has no friends that are women.
i told him I don’t care if he has friends that are women but I do with her and we spoke of it last year. He said he likes her friendship and he wants to keep it.

he’s literally stopped me having male friends throughout all our time together, I purposely have never made any small talk or chatted to other men as I knew how he would feel and because his feelings were more important to me. So it was an easy thing to do to.

i read his messages to her, giving her support, taking time out of his busy work day to have a quick 5 mins catch up with her. Her dumping all her problems on him and him being so fucking supportive of her.

he does nothing like that for me, he’ll dismiss me when I want to talk, ignores me, never tells me I’m beautiful yet he’s telling this woman she’s a 9.8!

im done with him, whatever he says means nothing now, the trust has gone.
I’m just filled with anger that like a mug I stayed true and loyal to him whilst he was getting his kicks with a woman 10 yrs younger than him.

i know I need to look at the positives as throughout our relationship I always felt I was walking on eggshells. I knew I was unhappy in this marriage but tried to make it work for the kids. Now I know I need to suck it up and face reality and leave the fucker.

I'd leave him but do it over time play OK with him sort yourself out first and kids get some money behind u then go, my auntie had bought nearly a full house if new things ready for leaving her fella when she left!

9.8? She needs to tell him to fuck off an’all!

He asked for another chat this morning and I’m just dumbfounded.
his reasoning behind this friendship is because I’m taking a lot of time ‘doing me’. Such as I take time out doing my skincare routine such as face masks, cleansing, serums etc. im still in the house but upstairs!
he’s also not liking that I’m taking time out to exercise!
he goes to the gym whenever he wants which I have zero issues with, why on earth would I?
he also complained that he does the same as me when it comes to household/kids responsibilities AND that he has his career on top of that.

in reality I do the lions share, it’s only on weekends where we do a day each so the other person can have a free day to relax and do whatever.

i know he’s reaching and coming out with whatever he can to try and salvage this but it goes to show if that’s all he’s got he’s getting desperate.

Wow!! Op wat an absolute t@@t he is, i can honestly say you have this f@@ker sorted out, you know and once you know you can't go back op, next will be the tears, oh and if they don't win you over then comes the mr angry with, it's all your fault shit, never loved you anyway shit was waiting for the right time,
It's coming op, so buckle down, deep breath,
You're got this op, lipstick at the ready op

Yeah I am getting worried he’s going to become unreasonable and an insufferable arse

What a pathetic walking cliché he is. Middle aged bloke grooming and feeling flattered by the attention of a younger woman. He WANTS to have a physical affair with her, even if he says otherwise. His fragile little ego is being stroked and he thinks he has options.
Why are men so fucking mentally weak?

To be honest he sounds quite stupid

Be an insufferable CF back to him, give him a taste of his own medicine

Be the same back. Get a good solicitor. The man is vile

Only because he had the nerve to tell her that as a married woman she shouldn't have any male friends because it wasn't right! But obviously it's ok for a married man then!

I think I’m well within my rights to go sleep with whoever I want. I’ve been loyal and dedicated to that man for years. He’s the only man I’ve ever slept with and I’ll be damned if he’s the last!

when I get to the stage where I am ready to start I’ll be sure to have the best time I can.

@Ohlifelife People from both genders rate other people. Also, people even rate themselves. It's not something specifically that men do to women.

In a relationship with an equal balance yes - here that’s not the case tho

How sad that you actually seem to think that's normal behaviour and don't see it as dehumanising and degrading.

You don't have sex with someone to get back at partner

Sounds like you have checked out and ready to explore what the world has to offer. And what a blessing that is when the man you are married to is a complete dick. If you are ready to move on then dump him and sleep with his mate 😂.

It's normal, but I didn't say it isn't dehumanising and degrading.

Normal amongst who?
Certainly not normal for any one I've met in real life.
And I would hope that anyone who heard such degrading language would challenge it.

It's common enough that I would hear it in the media from time to time. As I said before, I hear it from both men and women.

For me this relationship has been wrong since the time you wouldn’t make small talk with another man to protect your DH feelings.
I think there should never be limits in a relationship where you can’t have male friends and he can’t have female friends. It’s just…the trust is never been there.

Men are absolute shitbags. Get rid of it and be happier.

I’m glad I’m in my late 50s. My husband has had female friends and I’ve had male friends and there’s never been any of this mistrust. It’s never a good sign if he doesn’t trust you to have male friends and it’s on a downward slope if you have to say ‘you can’t be friends with X or Y’. However, my DH has never been a flirt.