For discussion/viewpoints really. I think marriage is increasingly becoming an outdated concept. I think the value system that underpins it is, theoretically lovely - commitment to one partner for the rest of your life. But the reality of human nature is that people often outgrow each other, sometimes quickly and sometimes after 30 + years together.
I don’t think there is any shame in parting ways with someone who you’ve had a good run with, you’ve been good friends, you might have had children, but seasons move on and the whole idea of “for life” actually becomes too much pressure for people who have tried their best, had good times, but just………moved on. Yes there is something nice about knowing one person forever, but in reality I’m beginning to wonder if the unrealistic expectation of the forever part just forces people into long term unhappiness eventually.
I think marriage often does work - but for a certain lifespan. It’s a contract, in many ways, but contracts that don’t have a review and renewal date after a certain period of time are dangerous things. People should be given the option of continuing to choose their partner. In a utopian world we like to imagine we all stay together until death do us part, but in reality many people are living under conditions that they wouldn’t choose if the contract came up for renewal.Then, when divorces do happen they are often acrimonious, leaving one or both partners feeling like a failure for calling time.
Marriage isn’t just about romance anyway, it is about nailing down financial security and loyalty for the sake of children and asset-building. Yes romance comes into it at the beginning and no-one enters a marriage thinking it will fail. But it’s an outdated concept that allows no flexibility for re-assessment or understanding of the fluid nature of people as they move from one life stage to another.