Married 35 years. Adult kids still living at home. Husband has been grumpy, agressive, speaks to me terribly (& kids) for as long as I can remember. Have threatened to leave many times but never went through with it as was unable to support kids on my own. Now in a position to do so and told him 4 weeks ago wanted a DV and was no going back. Cut a long story short he was devastated and begged me to give him one last chance. After week of deliberating and massive talk about everything unacceptable about how he treats me agreed to give him a shot - on understanding I might still leave. Requested full disclosure of all finances and pension to eliminate risk of him transferring funds out. He’s being alot nicer and trying really hard but I’m still wary he’s more worried about finances and keeping his trophy family close. Has narcissistic tendencies and last straw was him shouting at me in public for no good reason. We hardly spoke for 4 months after that and although he realised he was out of order he never once tried to address it or apologise, until I told him I wanted a DV. ( usual pattern never apologises). I’m mellowing now that he’s been trying really hard - not yet made my mind up - but am I being a mug here and should I just tell him I’m proceeding with a DV as he hadn’t been interested in sorting out his issues over the past 20 years ? I was really so sure I wouldn’t cave and that I def wanted a DV, and now I’m doubting myself ..