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Any advice for me (33F) thinking about dating older men (42-50) and I am dating with intention??

57 replies

ForeverHopeful3 · 02/07/2025 04:48

I left my ex in May and I am done dating these losers who need 5+ years with a woman before they can make up their mind about marriage. I am 33 years old, I want to find my hubby (like yesterday lmao but I know I have to be patient), and I want kids in the next 2-3 years.

I am on dating apps and until tonight, I have been focusing on men 33-38 years old. Well, I put the age to 42-48 and my gosh, these guys are HOT! Not all of them, but I see some real Alphas and I feel like that is missing in my age group.

Has anyone dated older before? What's it like? The one's I am matching with have no kids, never married, and state that they are also dating for intention and want children. They are all well off in their careers and most of them are closer to 42-45.

I have never dated this far out of my age before but I am definitely down to try it.

OP posts:
SayLaveee · 02/07/2025 20:51

Also many will say no kids to get you on a first date, before unleashing the truth of their shitshow baby-daddy lives one month down the road

Gymbunny2025 · 02/07/2025 21:42

Even if they genuinely do suddenly want marriage and kids post 45… I wouldn’t want to be partnered up with an old dad with no energy and all his mates kids are flying the nest.

Cucy · 02/07/2025 22:15

Age is not an issue but I wouldn’t recommend dating in July when you only broke up in May!

You need time to heal and work out what went wrong/what you want from the next relationship.
Else you’re going to end up with God knows what.

Kulwinder54 · 04/07/2025 18:08

So many men over 40 have ED...go for younger...

IgglesWiggle · 04/07/2025 20:21

OK, just be mindful that a fair proportion of men on dating sites are not single! They may say they are out of a relationship but are actually just on their way out...
And they will fall over someone younger so don't be swept off your feet too quick. Also be mindful that many will lie about age so you might have a 50 y/o who is 55 etc. 10 year age gap max, above that and it starts to show as you get older and you don't want to end up being the carer if you can avoid in the first place.

Other than that, go for it!

July202 · 04/07/2025 20:46

NeverDropYourMooncup · 02/07/2025 06:48

You're too old for a lot of them because they'll hear your biological clock ticking from a mile off. But they'll know you're desperate, so could get a few shags out of it if they promise you enough.

You sound absolutely ghastly

HappySheldon · 04/07/2025 20:53

Well- I was 30 when I met DH who was 51. Not OLD just a chance meeting and we fell in love. He had been married for 5 minutes and divorced 5 years. No children. We were married and our first born 7 years later. Second 9 years later. Worked for us. Is working for us. Ok yes he was an older dad (now 72) and no, he was not an exhausted older dad (still isn't). No ED either- then or now.

My take on it (based on my lone experience) is that men my age were basically just messing around, sowing wild oats, still had literally decades before they had to get real about things, family wise. I was the one holding off on marriage and kids as I felt I had things I wanted to do still.

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