Don’t want a man but want sex!

[NK6ef6113dX12766951de9]

I hesitated to write this as I don’t want to seem crass but here goes. I have recently turned 50 and come out of a seven year relationship where little by little, many, many lies were revealed. It was on and off for a long time until I just couldn’t go on with a man I didn’t trust. Anyway, it’s all in the past and I am processing everything slowly (it’s been 9 months) but I really miss the sex.

i have tried internet dating but as a working single mum, I just don’t have the time (or the inclination) for the texting and getting to know a man, let alone scheduling time to meet them. It’s too complicated to integrate a man into our mostly settled family dynamic, and although it’s hard financially, I can manage OK without a man. I don’t need one. But I do want to have sex.

i don’t want to go on the dating sites saying I want no strings sex because that may open the floodgates for all sorts. I fancy younger men but don’t want to have to teach them. I don’t really fancy men my own age (they say men age better than women; I beg to differ!) I was in touch with an ex who was making all the right moves towards rekindling, and it turns out he has a wife!!!

Has anyone had any luck with meeting nice, respectful and classy men for fun dates and mind-blowing sex?

Yep! Get on the apps and be totally honest and blunt. Since my divorce I’ve had three wonderful FWBs. One still going strong after 18 months. No expectations, no pressure. We just meet up whenever we can.

I’m 51, and when I came out of a 15 year relationship (sexless for the latter part) a couple of years ago I felt exactly the same as you! I wanted sex and passion again but definitely did not want a relationship. I met three fantastic FWB (not all at once) online using Facebook Dating. As the very last line of my profile I put that I was looking for some fun times (code for no strings). It weeded out the ones who couldn’t be bothered to read to the end of my profile. Maybe I was just lucky (and I was also very picky) but the men I met were kind and respectful and on the same page as me. One was never going to be more than a ONS, another is still a friend but no longer with benefits (I suspect he would still like more) but I ended up accidentally falling for the third (against all my better judgment!) and we have been in a proper relationship for nearly a year. It was brilliant fun and I honestly felt like a teenager again with all the excitement and the snogging 😂. Go for it OP and good luck!

Yep as the others have said be honest firm and polite and dont be afraid to block pervs!
Ive used apps for years for FWB liaisons, find uk free dating most recently suits my needs.

Recommended the site to a recently split 50 something pal and in six months she has three guys she can now call on for dates or the other stuff and has also met a effeminate platonic buddy that likes to do her housework and take her on hols!

What about your colleagues? Would one of them be willing to have sex with you>

Not sure I would fancy that much!

I’m in a similar boat, although I prefer date style meets and then we go our separate ways for a while and get on with our own lives.

I’ve been lucky in finding this in the past. People change though and what people want now is not what them may want in another year. Theses things sadly often come to an end.

If you just want sex, go younger. You should be using a condom for casual sex and you need a man young enough to be able to use one without risking erectile dysfunction. Easy on the eye too. Men in their 30s are good. Young enough, but not too young.

Yes! Absolutely in the same position as you. Be careful and safe, but get out there and have fun

I have a fwb.
I also have ons no strings no drama.
Clothes on clothes off done deal.
I also go on holidays a lot and what happens abroad stays abroad boy have i got some fun memories.
From Japan Thailand Russia back home in the uk Spain yep ive fucked around the globe.
And i dont care.
I always protect my self and use protection.
Im hurting no one.
Ive been single for years and i love it.
No plans to shut my legs for good.

It's true, I've found men in their late 40s/50s reluctant to use condoms for that very reason, and it's really annoying.

i don’t want to go on the dating sites saying I want no strings sex because that may open the floodgates for all sorts

You don't have to put it upfront, but you can say it direct to someone who interests you. I'm sure many men would be glad to not do the constant texting and dating charade either if you tell them you just want a hook-up. Obviously choose wisely and don't put yourself at risk, but it should be relatively easy to get what you want compared to those who are looking for love and commitment.

Consider a swingers club too, single women very much worshipped in these.

Coming back to add that like previous posters I also specified I was looking for a younger man. My FWBs have all been 40/41 and no problems with everything working (and more than once in fairly quick succession 😂)

This is what I envision too- a date, dinner, some eye contact and flirting, building the anticipation. Not just transactional sex.

This is exactly what I have in mind.

Out of interest what sites are the best for these fwb. Ive had a quick Google search and there are loads. I am sure not all are legit. Could some please drop me a dm with url links. Much appreciated

Did you get any links @TheWayIsUp ?

This sounds like me. Did I write this 😂

Currently divorcing. Separated almost 2yrs and prob no sex for last 6mths of marriage and single mum

when would I find the time or energy but yes would love some sex.

I’m in the same boat. Separated and now just looking for fun.
I tried FAB and was inundated with men and dick pics! I told them off which was hilarious but I did meet a couple of men that were decent and had good chat. I’m now friends with them but there’s no spark. so still waiting for that hot guy to make his move on me 😆

im in my 40’s and younger men in their 30’s are definitely the way to go 😉

I don’t understand why people get so offended by dick pics if you’re just wanting a FWB situation.

Surely that’s the whole point?

I would also be interested in the name of apps that may be good for making this kind of connection

@catin8oot5 it’s a huge turn off for me, I’m more turned on by it in person than in pics.

No, didnt get any Dm's lol

I heard of fab and was on it. But I think that is hard core sex like gang bangs and sex clubs for swingers.

Its just the normal ones I have tried bumble, tinder and badoo. But they are more for relationship. If there was just a decent site which isnt trying to rip you off or scam you that be good.

Im in london, so not sure if there is any specific sites. Might just have to go pub/bars ad find someone the old way lol

Because you don't want to see the dick of every guy that you say a tentative first hello to. From their profile, you think they look attractive so you say hi to find out if there's anything there... yes, it's largely down to looks but you also want to be able to have a conversation with them! And then before you've had a chance to even ask where they live, bam... there's the dick.

Let me find out more about you, if we vibe, if we fancy each other... yes maybe then it'd be nice to see the goods (although... that wouldn't do it for me, they're not the most attractive body part!)

I know exactly what you mean!

I don't want the kinky sites (have you tried feeld... that's scary as hell 😂), but I also don't want to find a soulmate. I want more than a one night, but I don't want a relationship.. just someone nice enough to date, have a laugh with, have glorious sex, and meanwhile carry on living a lovely single life.

It's like having a chinese takeaway... you have your favourite restaurant, your favourite dishes... but you don't want it every night of the week.