Finally got rid of my partner now ex

[tiredmummm]

Hi guys, I finally managed to get rid of my partner (ex).
He moved back to his flat, originally he was getting evicted from there so I let him come back but recently he found out that he didn’t actually get evicted.
Now this is the issue, he keeps calling me and telling me that he has nothing, that he sleeps on a concrete floor and he has no way of washing his clothes. He has no fridge or no cooker, no pots and pans etc.
When he moved back here after being evicted he has brought his washing machine and his fridge ( I ended up getting rid of mine) but I did tell him not to bring it and to leave it there.
He keeps saying that this is my fault that he is in this situation and that I have put him through a lot of shit, and that I should be grateful for having him in my life otherwise I would of had nothing.
I can’t help but feel bad that he’s in that situation but I don’t think it’s my fault, the relationship between us hasnt worked out and I told him I won’t be sacrificing my happiness and my mental health by living with him.
I suggested that he hand washes his clothes or take it to the laundrette, and also suggested that he buys himself a blow up mattress for the time being.
He laughed at me and told me he can’t do that because they could kick him out the flat at anytime and he doesn’t want to waste his money.
I don’t know how to feel about this, any advice or any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks you

Just block him.

Well we have a child together so he calls to speak to him

Block him. Why are you even talking to him?

How old is the child?

He is 5

Having read a few of your other posts, id suggest ending the phone calls and arranging for someone else to be there when he has contact with the child. Not you.

he is a prick

In my city the British heart foundation and Salvation army charity shops have “white goods” for folks like him.

Tell him to pull up his big boy trousers and think
outside the box for replacements. Most larger charity shops like Br Heart also have decent ex factory beds.

You are not his mother. Hes being pathetic.

He’s fucking useless.
Your 5 year old doesn’t need the hassle in his life - your ex has no interest in him.

I agree.
Your ex is a sex pest who has no interest in your child.

Block him, ignore him, and arrange for someone else to facilitate contact.

Mute him.
Tell him to contact you via a new email address and then ignore him.

You don’t know how you should feel? How about:

Glad he’s gone
That you made the right decision
That he’s utterly pathetic and manipulative

I’m just slightly worried that you have any doubts about this whatsoever.
I’d arrange times he wants to talk with your kid and refuse to accept calls at any other time.
Is he paying his CMS in full on time?

I suspect we are not being told the full story

Yes it's ok that he calls to speak to his child but you don't have to talk to him about his domestic arrangements or anything else. Just pass the phone over to your son for him to talk.

Mute him. Read the messages once every 3-4 days and reply only to those to do with your child. Have someone else facilitate access. He’s a grown man and your ex and he’s trying to manipulate you. You are in no way responsible for him. Make sure you apply for CMS.

Women are not rehab centres/homeless shelters for useless men.

I doubt he was ever being evicted.

What do you mean by that? What else would you like to know?

I have told him that there is help out there but he just needs to reach out. He told me he reached out to the council and they have refused to help him but I’m sure council isn’t the only option.

He was getting evicted as I saw the papers from the court but they haven’t carried out the eviction for some reason

I wouldn't trust him to be honest, he'll probably tell you anything to get you to take responsibility for his situation.
Block him, don't get reeled back in, he's an adult and can sort himself out. Do not start doing his bloody washing!

Salvation Army. Give him the number and tell him you won’t discuss it again.

Tell him to get on face book and ask if any one as got any of the things he needs people do it all the time..

This.
Set up an email just for him to discuss contact with son. Check it once a day. Ignore anything that isn't directly to do with son, contact arrangements etc. Do not answer his begging, whiny, manipulative rubbish.
Contact with son only with third party present.
And counselling for yourself. You need to build defences against his bullshit. He knows how to press your buttons to drag you back into his control. You need to learn how to ignore him.

Three words you need to say to him - on repeat:- “Not my problem.”

He cannot be arsed. He wants to control your time and have you do it. Dont.