I was in a 5 year relationship with a man I loved very much and although it was long distance we were making steps to move in as I thought he was very much in love too. Unfortunately, his business failed in November/December and he had to seek employment.
For disclosure he lives with schizophrenia and he got very very drunk one night in December and whilst he started off loving and asking me to be his wife, he ended the night in an episode where he shouted at me, told me I moaned all the time and a few other things. Then he passed out. He was apologetic the next morning and we forgot about it.
He found a job and I was delighted for him but maybe not as enthusiastic as I could have been as I had my own money worries. His job start date made it that we had to change some plans and there was an argument.
After that he started taking 'evening work'. This evening work got more frequent and by March I found he was seeing someone else. Stupidly I didn't end it and we kept working. Unfortunately, a month later it was found he was still seeing her. He blocked her but four days later he broke up with me. I was devastated and begged for another chance.
The day after we broke up he said we could try again and work toward getting back together. Things became more normal but he had to have 'space' Friday nights. There were more agruments about me being paranoid and needy, because there were more times I found or suspected he was seeing her. His excuse was we broke up.
One time he told me he was going to bed at 6pm. I found he'd been out with her but he swore blind they were just mates.
I wanted to see him on his birthday and he said no. I accused him again of spending it with her and again he denied it. So the weekend of his birthday came and he was as usual of late for weekend in sporadic in contact, he told me he had a gum abscess and then was getting drunk with his dad and uncle. By late evening Sunday on his birthday I got a text to say he loved me very much.
Unfortunately, despite him forcing me to block this other girl, a friend found pictures of them both in a hot tub having a weekend away. I was devastated, shaking and so upset.
I contacted the affair partner with screenshots, she replied, "haha don't believe you." He text me "Fuck you" he wouldn't answer my frantic calls and then I called her. She rang back and seemed a bit confused. He blocked me and text me to leave them alone and never contact them again. She text me to tell me she'd call me the next day but she would be staying with him. She later blocked me and never called.
He has blocked most ways of me contacting him. I don't dare go to his house. I feel sick, shaky, blindsided, humiliated and completely bereft. He promised me we would be going on our pre booked holiday in a few weeks. How could he lie to me like this? What on earth were his reasons for keeping me dangling when he could have just said, yes, I want her and I would have had to go. I honestly thought we had the chance to get back together when he had zero intentions of doing so. Now I'm left with a cc bill, his bloody guitar and a broken heart. How on earth do I begin to ever heal. I was egged on by my friend to contact the woman. I shouldn't have but I was desperate for an answer either way after 14 weeks of hell.
Sorry it's so long. 😭