Would a woman with boyfriend/husband want to arrange play date or whatever you call it with a single dad

[ThisGuys]

My daughter has gotten to be close friends with another girl in her class and the girls mum has asked about us getting together at the park so the kids can play, i don't just want to come out with are you single incase she's not and it mess up our kids friendship, she knows im single as I did mention it before, could do with a little advice

Thats the last thing id ever want

I think people are being slightly mean to you, OP. However, a little more context would help. Have you chatted much? Do you have a reason to think this is a way to get to know you?

I do agree with PP though, she is probably just thinking of her daughter. If she wants to let you know she is single or not, then she will...

is she an ex because of her jealousy perchance, or infidelity?

Either way, is it important, to you, for your child to have friends?

My ex cheated and that's why I left her and it ended up been that my daughter was put with me for her safety due to my ex inability to look after our daughter

Are you interested in dating her? Do you have reason to believe she's interested in you? If the answer is no to both then you don't need to know if she's single or not.

It's important to me my daughter has friends, iv been singel about 2 years and not looking to change that

This. Don’t shit where you eat.

Ok, so why does her opinion matter wrt the playdate?

Is it important to you that your child has wee pals (without conditions) or are you just looking for a prospective partner?

eta; ah! I see you've just answered that your single status doesn't factor in.

That doesn't explain why you'd need to know the relationship status of someone who's invited your child to the playground though.

Would the Mum being single be more appealing to you, as to whether or not you would take your child @ThisGuys?

I’m so confused as to why you told your ex about this, that’s such a weird thing to do?!
Anyway, just take it easy pal. Go, be friendly, not flirty, focus on your kid. It’s not hard.

OP, either you have totally misunderstood what a play-date is, or you are massively over-thinking.

We talk about alot of stuff when it comes to our daughter, like when theres invitations to birthday party's and when we go to the park with friends of my daughter, my ex has never really had a problem about it before but she does with this friend

It’s not your ex business. You don’t need to share that info in future.

I echo others don’t make it weird just go for the play date if she’s trying to feel you out to date she will make it clear enough by the questions she asks you. I’ve seen it from both sides, the single dad at my dd school got snapped up by a single mum within a year of them starting school, I can only assume that started as play dates. But I have also had a single dad creep me out when I’m just sorting my dd social life because I was single and he made it feel like a weird date- my dd doesn’t socialise with that kid anymore

Ok that's some good information,

What, a date?

So in that case why do you need to know if she's single?

I dont need to know i genuinely think she has a partner, I guess I just let me ex get in my head over it

So what if she does gave a partner? Why does it matter when you're just 2 parents helping their young children meet up to play?

Focus on what's best for your child, without overthinking 🙂

It could just be about the kids friendship. I often took my son on play dates with his best mate. Sometimes his friends mum brought him, sometimes his dad. We were both married and it was just about the boys getting along and spending time together. As we got to know each other more the two families would socialise and we all went camping together once. It could just be about the kids and she’s not even thought about whether you’re single or not.

If there has been some instability on your ex’s part that means she hasn’t always been the best parent she could be, then it’s likely other parents have picked up on you being the more reliable parent. I suspect that’s why this mum has asked you. Not because she wants a date, but because maybe you are more approachable or not as flaky as your ex, or whatever.

My dd has a friend with parents who are split and I often go through the dad to arrange things. He’s more dependable and less likely to be drunk than mum. I’m very much not single and nor is he and there is no ulterior motive.

I would add that suggesting a park meet up tells me even MORE that this is just a playdate. She's suggesting a public.place, might be other families there etc. It sounds like she is conscious of what could be you getting the signals wrong.

I think you’re really over-thinking this, probably because of your controlling ex-partner. But women don’t think like this - her DD gets on well with your DD, and they’ve probably both asked for a play date. Just go with the flow - if it’s a regular thing you may end up getting to know her, and her partner if she has one, quite well. Or, if she doesn’t, then getting to know her and maybe her friendship circle quite well. Or…maybe she does like you and is single, so win win if you like her etc. But just take things as they come, and put your DD first. Don’t worry.

How old are you???????!!!!!!!

😀

Do you not get out a lot, OP? I can assure you that in many years of arranging play dates with parents of either sex, I have never accidentally had sex either any of them.

A play date is meeting up so the kids can play together. Not a 'date' between two parents while their kids play in the background. Your ex is being ridiculous and controlling.