He proposed a couple of years ago but doesn’t want to live together.

[feelingtotallylost]

We’re engaged. He’s 67 and I’m 49. Fell madly in love for the first time for us both when we met 5yrs ago.
I have 3 teens and he has a 22yr old living with him 4 nights a week.
I want us all to live together. He’s not ready. I get it, why would he want to live with three teens?! But then why did he propose.
I feel so lost & confused with it all.

Great that you're in therapy as it's somewhat unfair to expect your partner to heal you.

I also think he's wise, because there's not enough love in the world that would get me to live with someone else's 3 teenagers. And I say that as the parent of a 16 yo.

There's a lot of wise words here. It is possible he wants to protect his DC's inheritance and knows that blending the families will cause complications.

He may be set in his ways and happy in his own home and not want this upheaval now at this stage in his life. Which a a different stage to the one you're in.

And is it possible, op, that you're actually seeking a father figure? Someone to make it all better?

I think therapy for you rather than the huge change that marriage and a change in living arrangements would bring is the best route for you now.