Anyone very contented being single but open to a relationship .. in their fifties?

[straightasapoker]

Just that really.. and if you are happy single despite being open to something, do you pursue dating or are you leaving it in the hands of the gods ?! I’m in that in between place.. adore my own time, company and being captain of my
own ship but would enjoy a companion/ lover… with no intention of living together/ step parenting/ sharing finances etc.
is it too much to ask do you think? Too selfish?

Me too and I'm in my 60's lol not actively looking it's in the lap of the gods 🤔 socially active so who knows..... I'm happy either way life is good 😄

Lots of people would be open to that. It's perfectly understandable that you want companionship.

I am mid 50s , was happily on my own past 12 years, then met a lovely man naturally whilst out walking and cycling. We have been together almost a year. We both have our own houses, we live in neighbouring villages, we get on brilliantly, we have just got back from a fantastic weekend together, now both back in our own homes.
It's a lovely balance at this stage of life l am not looking for big changes. He is lovely company, l still have my own time and space. I feel l have the best of both worlds.

That sounds like the perfect situation for me !!! Need to get a bike !!

Absolutely that’s me and my friends. All in our mid 50’s to early 60’s, have a great social circle and would only have a relationship if it enhances what we already have.

Not one of ever wants to cohabit again.

There are some men out there apparently - not seen any evidence tbh 🤣 there does seem a lot of older men wanting a nurse with a purse.

I’m mid fifties and have been separated/divorced 13 years now. My sister is early 50s and in the middle of a divorce. She’s literally gone mad man hunting whereas I’m the total opposite. But I do have a very serious chronic illness which I will hopefully be having surgery abroad for this year and if successful will literally give me my life back so you never know what I might get up to then😁

I'm 18 months into.losing my husband suddenly after a heart attack. I've met someone recently who's 17 years younger than me, we're going to be FWB, I just hope he can keep up with me 😁

I'm 51 and, after 4 years of dogged OLD I met someone last year. He was great at first, but gradually, as he let more and more of his true self show, I realised he wanted more from me than he was willing to give. Eg he has severe mental health problems that, although he worked hard at managing them, became more and more difficult for me to cope with, specifically his demands that I should just know how to treat him in the exact, precise way he needed to be treated in order for him not to spiral downwards (I'm talking specific phrases etc). It became increasingly draining, and I started to suspect that he was using his mental health as an front for abusive behaviour, so I got rid.

This is after a lifelong history of abusive/ disappointing relationships. It's sad that I still can't discern the initial red flags in these men- is it me or is it them? Maybe most single men in their 50s have serious issues?

Anyhoo, for the first time in my life I feel that I genuinely can't be bothered. I have a fairly high sex drive, but I can't even be bothered to find someone to get my rocks off with any more.

I'm not blowing my own trumpet, but I have been more educated, interesting, creative, funny, supportive and positive than pretty much everyone I've dated, and I just haven't got it in me to raise another substandard man up again.

Surely that is the clue? Start with higher standards for your dates.

I’m mid 50s, been single for about 12 years.
I’d like to meet someone as it would be nice to have someone to go and do things with, and just have someone to chat to really, but I don’t know I’d want to live with them.
I don’t have the nerve to try OLD as you hear such horror stories, but clearly don’t go to the right kind of places or do the right kind of hobbies to meet eligible men.

Late 40's but had been forever single and wasn't even thinking about dating until someone I met through a hobby group asked me out! It's very much a companion / lover type relationship at the moment and after a year there's been no discussion of us taking it to the level where we consider moving in together. It's nice, really nice, and something I didn't expect to find at this age!

I’m single & perfectly happy but if someone amazing were to drop by, I might consider it but I have a 9yo DD so it would be kept completely separate from her. I wont ever go looking though and I’m happy anyway!

I'm in my 50s. Single 6 years. Not dated at all or had any sort of relationship.
I have no desire to and starting to think I never will.

I wouldn't mind someone to meet up with occasionally but realistically, it's unlikely to happen.

My standards are extremely high when I meet someone.

Intelligence: check
Interested in various things, has friends, hobbies: check
Appearance of emotional maturity: check
Generous (not necessarily financially), genuinely interested in me: check
Self supporting and independent: check

They know what women are looking for all right! Then 6 months down the line you're gradually finding out that that impressive book they mentioned reading is the only thing they read all year, that the friend they alluded to was the only one, that they might have had an interesting weekend away a year ago but every weekend since they've been slumped in front of the TV, that the emotional maturity is a front and the little digs at you are starting, that every plan you suggest gets nixed, and that you're spending an increasing amount of time trying to jolly them out of a mood....

The problem I think is that there are far more cool, sorted women in their 50s than there are men.

I have been single for quite awhile now, I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in sex, so that’s a bit of a barrier, but that might change if I met someone I actually liked, I am potentially open to a relationship but not actively looking for one. I do feel like I’d like a “companion” My best friend recently got into a relationship, so lots of the things I would’ve previously done with him are now not happening. On the plus side, it has made me go out and about more to meet more people, but I just rarely feel any attraction.

I am mid 50s and have met a lovely man through OLD. He's into all the same things as I am so travelling, theatre, cinema and gigs.

We have been together about 5 months now. We both have our own places, we get on so well, we have just got back from a fantastic weekend away together. I'm seeing him Wednesday as he's booked tickets for the theatre.

He is lovely company, l still have my own time and space. I wonder if doing things this way keeps the excitement fresh as I miss him when we are apart and so much look forward to seeing him.

He ticks all the boxes mentioned up thread.

Intelligence: check
Interested in various things, has friends, hobbies: check
Appearance of emotional maturity: check
Generous (not necessarily financially), genuinely interested in me: check
Self supporting and independent: check

Plus he's a great cook which I very much am not.

I read that as great cock 😁

That as well tbf..... 😉

My sex drive has ramped up to teenage levels, we are both the same. No issues from him in that department thank goodness.

I hear you OP. I’m 58 and have been divorced for two years. Very content on my own. I would sometimes like A.N. Other to go out to dinner, or on days out, with, but I’m not convinced about living with someone again. The big problem is that I very rarely find any man attractive now. Nevertheless I’ll try to remain open minded just in case I do happen to bump into someone who’s sufficiently amazing to make me change my mind.

@SantasLargerHelper

That sounds perfect and exact what I’d be looking for. I’m 51 and whilst I’m quite self sufficient and have friends.. most of them are happily married so I’m a bit lonely at weekends. And I miss the companionship, being a priority for someone, weekends away. And well just FUN and sex!!

what site was it out of interest? I tend to stick with Hinge but keep seeing these ones for over 50s… I just don’t know!

good on you 😊

I met him on Tinder in fact. He's my exact age, into the exact same things. We're from the same area and have a lot of shared experiences.

I'm really into my music and I liked the fact that you could upload your Spotify account to your Tinder profile. All my school and university boyfriends had been sweet gentle indie boys, so I was looking for a grown-up version of them I guess. Which he is.

Isn't it great, I was so dry after the menopause but it's all flooding back, I just walk around with a smile on my face lol

@1983Louise it's absolutely joyous 😊 I've been very lucky in that my only menopausal symptoms were a rocketing libido and the overwhelming desire to completely change my life. I ditched the grumpy dementor I was living with and ventured out on a life-affirming voyage of discovery. Culminating in meeting this absolutely lovely fun, interesting, emotionally balanced guy who I feel I could spend the rest of my life with.

That's so good to hear, you're certainly living your best life. I know mine won't be long term but I'm having fun for the first time in ages x

My plan was to get a collection of younger FWB and have some fun. I started auditioning and did have a great time with that. Then accidentally stumbled across this one. My perfect match 😍