I am so angry. I keyed c*** on his car, but that isnt enough. Please support me....

[ratbunny]

So looks like I am a lone parent now.
I moved out at 2am on monday night, after xh finally admitted he was seeing someone. I took my son to my mums, only stopping to key his car and his 2 thousand pound guitars.

I actually think he is going through a mid life crisis or nervous breakdown or something. He is not coping with life at all, spent no time with me and ds etc et cetc

His new woman is 10 yrs younger than him, and is ME 10 years ago. We even look alike. He has told many people it nevr got physical, and they only met twice outside work, etc etc, and he is quite possibly telling the truth.

But now he is pushing for separation, our house sells in 3 weeks so he has to find a flat, and all I can think is that when he is alone, guess who will be there with him. I want to hurt him as much as he has hurt me, and the urge to go and kick her ass is SO strong I might just do it.

TBH I dont hink he knows what he wants. I dont know what I want. I am looking for a new house for me and ds.

Please tell me it will get easier.

i can tell you that you don't have tosell the house sweetie

tell him to fuck off and get a flat with no equity

he has to still give you child support and youare allowed to live in the family home until yor child is 18

see a good lawyer

and screw him where it hurts

his pockets wont have any money and i bet your life she won't be playing pocket pool with a no hoper with no money and a second family - oooh sexy ..,.not

actaully, I have seen a solicitor. He has agreed to give me all the equity, so I am looking for some contract for him to sign. And he says he will support me and ds - I asked for £550 a month, and he agreed (I didnt talk to him, might key c* on his face if I did).

I have moved out, and in the 48 hours since I found out have sorted out so much. I am looking at 2 houses tomorrow. I cant stay n our old house, for many reasons, and have moved to the town I work in.

But it's all going so fast.

And all I really want to do is kick her scrawny little 23 year old ass. I reckon I could have her.

What sort of a bitch tells a man with a 15 month old son that she loves him?

it will get easier,in 6 months when he is bored of the slapper young lady and begging you to come back to him,and you are laughing with pity at how pathetic he is and thinkingof how wonderful your life is without him in it,you will look back on this time and think 'fuck-i cant believe i was so angry over that tosser that i keyed his car!oh well,who cares?'.

visualise the scene of you laughing at im while he begs,it may make you feel a little better.

OMG Rats just seen this!!

I am so for you right now. What a total waste of fucking space.

Custy talks sense (as usual) Look after yourself and S - he did fuck all anyway.

I am on MSN if you need to chat.

diva - the visualisation will help!!

I dont even know if I want him back anyway. I am just incredibly angry. My short term aim is to quit fags, get back into martial arts, practise sparring til I am as hard as I used to be, then kick her ass.

Maybe I wont kick her ass (I would lose my job as a primary teacher), but its good motivation.

It has been such a shock.

In a year's time you'll have the house, your job, your mojo back, and she'll be stuck with him and all his baggage.

Good for you keying his car.... know exactly how you feel. I wish my Ex nothing good and would have torched his house and his business if i wasnt found out. You WILL get over this and through this.... it will get better.... YOU are at the bottom and can only go up ! wishing you hugs , luck and best wishes . Stand your ground, be assertive, tell him he is a shit and make him feel dead guilty. things will def. get better . XXxxxx

Oh rat I am so sorry but you stick to your guns and screw the little bastard to the ground. Fancy him putting you through relate. Please pop over to the post natal thread you will get lots of good advice on there x

FWIW I don't think you'd be out of order keying c* on his face . And hers . So sorry Rat

Rat - can't believe he's doen this what a complete and utter t**t to lose you and S over her (whats the beeting she'll lose interest when he is skint and 'available') you are being incredibly strong and positive, please keep doing that and am glad you have managed to get him to release equity, will you be able to get a place you want in the town you are in?

Anything we (post natel) lot can do to help please let us know, keep strong, keep sorting out whats best for you & S and dont waste anothe rminute on 'd'h

sorry to hear about this ratbunny. imo you should go get your hair done, buy a knockout dress leave the dc's with your mum for the night have a great night with your mates and forget about him for at least that night! its the least you deserve!

oh and remember if she is ten years younger it prob wont work any just think in a few years he will be wanting quiet nights in front of the tv she will still be out partying with her friends and wondering what she found exciting about him in the first place (probably the fact that he was married) and will therefore find another married man to leave him for

Oh Rat, just seen this. I am so sorry. What an absolute and total fcking wnker. And she deserves a good kicking too. Stupid bitch.

Sorry but infidelity is UNFORGIVABLE, physical or otherwise. Especially when there is a little child involved.

I really don't know what to say other than we are all here for you on the PN thread if you need to sound off. Big hugs sent your way x

So sorry its come to this RB.

You are so much better off without him.

Just screw him for all you can now. He's the one at fault not you and thats how the courts will see it too.Kx

i am sure you are absolutely furious and devastsated and i don;t blame you one bit

BUT< be aware you could be charged with criminal damage and made to pay for the damage you ahve caused if your H wants to get even more vindictive, so tempting though it is, don;t damage any more of his stuff

i cant believe you keyed his car
rise above it ffs before you get yourself in bother

I keyed my XH's car too. It's easy enough to say control yourself, it's not so easy to do it when you are so angry and hurt that you are temporarily beyond your own control. Hence the defence 'temporary instanity'. (I'm not saying you are insane, RB, but I certainly was out of my tree when it happened to me).

And a keyed car is better than a knife in the head, so he should look on the bright side, because that was actually what I wanted to do to him.

On the other hand, several years down the line, I'm a bit ashamed of myself for doing it. I wish I could have made out that I didn't care - it would have been less of an ego-trip for him.

You have my sympathy, Ratbunny. I hope you are okay, this is an awful awful thing to go through.

Sorry you are suffering, but do not commit any more criminal damage and definitely do not assault anyone. Is this man worth going to jail for? Sexual jealousy is not a defence against charges of assault and vandalism, nor should it be.

What Elisabethberesford said!!

But please don't do any more damage to things or people. Not worth it.

please stop damaging property.
You could be in serious trouble.
I hope things work out for you.

I don't think she should damage anymore property either, but I think she was incredibly restrained and the police are often very understanding of things like this.

For example - I heard of a case where a woman had stabbed her partner in the stomach as he had smacked her child, and she got off with a caution!

Restrained?
You can't be serious.

It is not the police she has to worry about. If he presses charges of criminal damages ( if I was him I would )the police attitude will count for nothing in court.

hello.
I promise I wont key anything else, or beat anyone up . I do laugh to myself that he now drives round with a description of himself on his car.

I have found myself a house.
I dont want it.
But I will have to move on sometime, so I will go for it.

Life is shit

Wait until you get into your house and make it your own, it will get better, it just takes time.