One night stands [Title edited by MNHQ at OP's request]

[LemonDuck223]

How do you not get attached. Me and a guy met through friends last night for the first time. He doesn't live close to me over 1 hr a way. We both said we didn't want relationships atm but we then slept together and spend all day together. First guy I've felt comfortable and safe with in such a long time.
I guess I feel a bit sad that it couldn't be anything more.
Could anyone give me tips to not get emotionally attached in situations like this. Wish I could be a boy and compartmentalise stuff like this as it would be much easier to deal with

And “you’re” since the spag critique has started …

He replied quicker than I thought. He said that he is sure our paths will cross again in the future. He said our city is a good night out but the company was better

That’s frustratingly ambiguous OP!! Will you reply again or leave it there?

Hmmm sounds noncommittal
Think I’d be wanting him to put his cock on the block more, so to speak

I think it's an opening for flirting to say about the company being better.

This is why it was better when it was frowned upon to sleep with men you weren't married to. (Ok, we all know that's silly) But it increased the pressure to not be seen to be sleeping with someone you weren't in a serious relationship with.

All these friends with benefits cheap hook ups, one night stands etc - just leave women as the "used" one.

Just forget about him. If he liked you , he'd soon come after you.

You could always invent a (daytime) reason to be in his city in a month or so. Ask him if he fancies meeting for a coffee when you’re there? I’d leave it a few weeks though. And I’d keep it as obviously just coffee so he doesn’t think it’s just another hookup.

Yea i think it was nice saying the company was better

That’s a whole lot of pseudo science and generalisations!

I’d say he’s interested… he didn’t have to reply so quickly and he didn’t have to say nice things about enjoying your company. If he’s not interested but just wanted to be polite and reply, I think he’d have been slower and less complimentary. Also saying he’s sure you’ll cross paths again suggests he’s considered that and isn’t planning to avoid you…. Good luck!

It's not pseudo science. It's actual science. It's a real phenomena. Look it up!

As for generalisations - well I'm sure there are both men and women who are outliers in this regard, but for the vast majority it will be the case.

I don't think his text suggests he's interested. He's just being polite and wants to keep it open in case the opportunity arises for another shag. If that's what you want too, then great. But nothing in his text suggests he has any feelings other than that.

I wouldn't respond any further OP. Let him make the next move.

And some of us men need that oxytocin release - just to get there in the first place 😂
Outliers or not - guess we’re all different

Sorry for stating the obvious but perhaps the sex was not good enough for him to tray again ? It happens all the time.

Well if anything i think I should be the one disappointed lol I think he had too much to drink and couldn't stay hard or finish.

Oh well it was a fun weekend.

As with any physical characteristic, men and women are more alike than not in terms of the happy hormones they release (and respond to) on orgasm (or on talking/cuddling with someone they find attractive for example) - the two sexes follow bell curves that are slightly staggered. So women are somewhat more likely to be more responsive to oxytocin than men overall, and the far end of the spectrum, where the high responders lie, are all women.

But there are lots of in-between cases. Case in point: my H can't have sex unless he loves the woman, whereas before I met him, the occasional ONS scratched my itch.

@LouiseMadetheBestBroccoliPasta thank you for that - every day’s a school day 😁