Please explain Bumble to me

[SingleAndReadyToFlamingle]

I’m on bumble and have paid for the premium level (1 month only!) but am I missing something?

How the hell do I message someone?
If I swipe right and ‘like’ them, their profile just disappears into the thin air. Am I supposed to wait in case they like me back?

I’m totally lost with this…

Im new to Bumble as well but I think it only allows you to message someone when you both ‘match’. IE they swipe right on you too. I hate how you can’t see who has liked you unless you pay £15 a week (or whatever).

I haven’t been on bumble but I think the answer to this will depend on whether you are male or female so you need to make that clear. I believe on bumble only the woman can initiate the conversation with a man.

I’ve paid for premium for a month so I can see who has liked me, but it seems mad that I don’t seem to be able to start a conversation with someone who I’ve liked.

I feel like I’m not seeing an icon to click on to message someone I like.

You can give a compliment to anyone but you can only message if you match.

Personally I think Bumble premium is a waste of money - you get very little that you don’t get on the free version

Men can only msg you if you've liked them and they've liked you, so if you like someone and they don't like you, it's not a match and you can't chat, sometimes you'll get a match with a guy you liked ages ago, I guess it depends on how active your likes are as to how quickly you might match. It's confusing!

You’ll need to clarify if you’re male or female.

If you’re male you can never start a conversation, it always has to be the woman. To avoid men bombarding women who have no interest in them. So your money is wasted.

If you’re female you have to wait for a match, so they still need to have liked you, which is fair. Then you can message and there are time limits for replies.

I’m guessing the premium allows you to see who has liked you so you can then swipe. But no idea how to do this.
I think you need to be patient, OLD is never a quick fix. You’ll need to extensively screen matches to weed out the marrieds, weirdos and text buddy’s.

It’s been a while since I’ve been on Bumble but I don’t imagine it’s changed (?).
You swipe on who you like and don’t like.
If they have already swiped “like” on you, it will instantly come up as a match and then it is the female that messages first (again, unless this has changed?).
If they haven’t come across your profile yet, it will disappear into thin air.
Once (and if) they eventually come across you and swipe “like” on you, you’ll get a notification of a new match and then you can message them.

Bumble has changed in that a man can message first but only if it’s a compliment or if you match and he responds to your prompt.

But once he’s sent 2 message he can’t send anything g further unless the woman responds within 24 hours

I matched with two married men on Bumble pretending to be single.
As soon as I confronted them that I’d found out they’re married and have children I was of course accused of being the weirdo stalker 😂
Okay, you’ve got me, I’m sorry I’m being careful and I’ve caught you being unfaithful and a liar, my bad 😂

Yep! Matching is only the start of the problem!
Be careful what you wish for OP!

That makes sense, but is very limiting.
I want to be able to look at a list of the men I’ve liked and send them a message, maybe after a couple of days but I think there’s some 24hour limit involved too. I don’t look at it every day!

I’m only paying for one month as I’m finding it a bit rubbish tbh. Apart from the fact that they keep recommending men who live at the other end of the country to me. 🙄

…not to mention that 90% look like they’ve slept in a hedge, never seen a salad and frankly, look like psychopaths.

Have a look at your settings, you can narrow them down to only show you men within a certain distance away from you.
You can only look at the men who you like once they like you.
The premium helps because those are the men that have already liked you.
Good luck, online dating can be so hard.
It can work for some! I know a couple who met on Plenty of Fish, they’re now married with a baby 🥹

You can set a distance limit in your settings as well as age criteria

You can only message me you like but haven’t match with via the ‘compliments’ which is a little icon on the left of their photo but unless they respond, you can’t actually chat. The 24 hours kicks in once you match - you have to message within 24 hours otherwise match drops off and once you d messaged, they get 24 hours to reply otherwise it expires.

Unfortunately you’ll find a lot of men match but never chat

i have set the distance but still get profiles that are miles away. They get an immediate left swipe.

Heads up, once you match on bumble, women have to message first.

That caught me out. I had matches but no one was talking to me and then they expired. I'd forgot women need to message first on bumble.

But you have to match with ppl first.

I disagree completely with you here.

I absolutely do not want to receive messages from people I have swiped left on. I swiped left on them for a reason.

I cba atm, but when/f I can there is no way I would see any app that allows people to message.

Underneath your distance there’s a button saying ‘show other profiles if we run out’ - you have to turn that off otherwise you’ll get people from miles away

If you’re not on Bumble at least every 23 hours (to give time to compose any messages within the 24 hour limit) then pause your profile.

Imagine 10am Monday you right swipe on a man. 2pm Friday he right swipes on you. One of you then has between 2pm Friday to 2pm Saturday to message. And the other has between 2pm Saturday to 2pm Sunday to reply. After that, you can message whenever. But if you went on Monday morning and Thursday afternoon, then again Sunday evening, you wouldn’t have been aware anyone ever matched with you.

The only apps where you can message without matching as far as I’m aware are POF and FB Dating

There may be others but Bumble/Tinder it’s match first

It's why I don't touch those former two! 'Hello gorgeous' from 60 year old men, no thank you.

@Sodthesystem Heads up, once you match on bumble, women have to message first

I think they stopped that a while ago, anyone can message first now.

Ah good to know.

I say ‘anyone’, I mean you still have to match, but the man or woman can message first.