I can't take this snoring...!

[someonepressthestopbutton]

Please make it stop!!! It's fucking horrendous. He's overweight.. un fucking healthy and sleep apnea is so bad. I've tried and tried to gently tell him it's out of control, he's made promises it will change - it hasn't. He's been staying here for over a week and now as his heating is broken.. honestly I'm done! 🤯 he's never going to change, his feet are firmly under the table and I need to tell him to leave before he gets too comfortable. No spare room sadly so off I go to the sofa I think!

Why should you sleep on the sofa? Wake him and tell him to move!

My DH’s snoring used to be horrific. He now uses mouth tape (from Amazon) and no longer snores!

As you say, just get him out. Reclaim your home. Send him back to get his heating fixed. He won't do that if he's too comfortable at your place.

Wake him up and send him home. Of course he’s asleep in your bed. You are allowing him to be.

I just need to reclaim my home.. if I'm honest I've realised I'm quite happy with my little house and the odd sleepover. A week of this sh*t has been a reality check. I'm sure he'd love nothing more than to settle here but it's just not happening. Fortunately my sofa is large and comfortable and I'm quite happy being on it - for tonight only!

Tel him in the morning you need your space back. He can buy a heated throw for home. Otherwise your banishing him to your couch and getting some earplugs

I have wondered why the heating issue hasn't been resolved already.. it's oil filled and had run out making the agar run dry. That was the Saturday before last so over a week now. I've asked a couple of times what's happening and been fobbed off - he arrived with two bags of washing and his cats.. and hasn't left. Nice cats but I'm not a huge fan if I'm honest! I'll be having strong words in the morning, I need them all gone.

God he sounds nasty!!

I'm a bit shocked with all the hate.
From what I know (I snore myself, so does basically everyone in my family), people don't choose to snore.

I'm not saying that you should sacrifice your sleep quality over it. But you can determine that something's a problem without blaming/judging/hating the person who caused the problem. Honestly, I would seriously reconsider this relationship if your opinion of this man is so low.

Aside from that, of course make him sleep on the sofa or tell him to go back to his place.

Hang on...two bags and cats!? Cocklodger comes to mind... get him gone!

Has he tried a CPAP machine? Current partner uses one, I can’t hear it at all and it stops the snoring completely.

If you don’t want him moving in for other reasons then he needs to go and you need to tell him that.

Does he use a cpap? Has he been diagnosed with sleep apnea?

It's true that no one intends to snore, but it's also true that you deserve a decent sleep. STBXDH snored terribly, and it occurred to me one night that I hadn't slept through the night in over a decade. (He had, of course.) Sleep deprivation is so all-consuming, you feel it deep in your bones, and it does feel disrespectful if the snorer makes no effort to reduce it.

STBXDH and I separated for other reasons, and I subsequently got together with DP, who uses a CPAP machine for sleep apnea. It's virtually silent.

It does sound like your DP is in no hurry, given how comfy he is at your place. We have oil fuelled heating, and if you run out of oil, it sometimes needs a heating engineer to bleed it through so that everything can work properly again. Along with a refill of the tank, of course. Has he ordered the fuel?

If it's not sorted by now, it's because he hasn't bothered. That's more telling than any amount of snoring.

Err … who is this guy?

You haven’t said!

I absolutely would judge someone who has been told his snoring is out of control and is disturbing someone when he is only an uninvited guest in HER home yet he has failed to do anything about it.

We have oil heating and ran out of oil a few weeks ago. Ran out on Sunday morning but didn't notice until Monday morning. Oil delivered Tuesday (paid £30 extra to bring it forward from Wednesday) and bled the air/restarted the boiler myself.

It's not hard, if you want to do it.

Wrong thread!

@ThisIsMyYearToFindMyself not the wrong thread at all.

The OP's partner is outstaying his welcome using a lack of oil at home to power his heating. I was just pointing out that delivery times are currently short for domestic heating oil, and restarting the boiler isn't rocket science.

I hadn't heard of mouth tape before.
Would you be ok to share the brand you use?

Ohh I get you now. I was thinking you’d come from a diy type thread 🤦‍♀️😁

Can you train the cats to sleep on his face?

It might muffle the noise.

The only thing worse than a snorer is a snorer who refuses to either believe that they snore (easily overcome by recording them) or a snorer who knows they snore and won't get help.

Get him gone home, OP. Tell him to put a jumper on.

Get him out asap. The fact that he turned up with his washing is very telling. Why hadn't he done his washing, the machine heats the water so nothing to do with the oil heating. Has he ordered an oil refill? Is he working? Regarding the snoring I know how you feel, my husband snores and I ended up moving to a room of my own, he uses a cpap machine now which is great but the nights he doesn't use it I have to use earplugs even in my own room with the doors closed. But I think you've been presented with a class one cocklodger who was comfy enough to turn up with washing and cats, get rid of him asap.

I really hope you've kicked him (and his cats) out of your home now OP?

He needs to go today.

Gone! Not willingly.. I'm delighted and looking forward to a nice sleep