I’m not even sure exactly how to descibe him. He’s a kind, generous man who works hard and always makes effort to see me, do things together but I’ve had a bit of a light switched on and realised the conversation is just not really reciprocated. I kinda talk at him and he just agrees. I’ll be telling him a story and he will just say “ah really?” Or say I’m ok the phone and come off it he would never ask who that was or anything about it (I don’t mean in a nosy way, just a general conversation). He’s had stuff go on in his life (wedding invites, job things etc) that I learn about weeks if not months later, just doesn’t think of share these with me.
if I tell him a story of something that upset me say in work, or in a shop or something he will say “that’s really crap”, the same line, never ask any questions.
the light bulb moment came really when I was waiting on a hospital appointment and the letter came through and I was so glad as this has been worrying me, glad to get appointment but also then nervous to see what’s going on. He didn’t once ask how I was feeling, when it was etc. he was there when I opened the letter and I told him “oh great this is the appointment”.
you might said in response to this that I should just tell him, not wait to be asked but I would just love a bit of interest/care. I’ve brought this up and he says he does care but that he doesn’t want to pry