Both in our early to mid 30s so I thought a year and a half is plenty of time to be engaged for our age. We are also living together now. We have discussed marriage and kids and I mentioned that I would not like to be together for more than 2 years and still don’t have a solution plan if we would get married. He seemed to be ok with the timeline but he never actively brought up the timeline convo again. I recently started to look at rings and I never try one on before. My friend who just got married recently has been encouraging me to at least start looking and it would take time to find something I like anyways so I should start looking for fun. I expressed to my bf that we should maybe go ring shopping together. He seemed ok to it at first. Today he finally mentioned that I am pressuring him and that I had been talking about it too much. Maybe I had been but I was just excited for the future and the fact that a few of my friends just got married recently made me feel the highs of being engaged. I freaked out and asked what he meant and he said he didn’t mean it in a negative way.
Now my head is all over the place. We had been talking about marriage for a while and he even wrote down the different shapes and cuts of rings that I came across on the Internet. I thought we were on the right direction. I had told him that I just wanted to do ring shopping for fun and did not expect this reaction.
Now I don’t want to even think about marrying him anymore. The relationship has been very good otherwise and he has genuinely been a good partner to me and his family is amazing to me.
Am I being dramatic? I feel dramatic because as the words came out of his mouth, my tears just wouldn’t stop dropping I had to take a cold shower to calm myself down. I can’t quite fantom whether it was the shame of me even asking to go for ring shopping or the fact that someone who I thought loved me would even feel pressured by ring shopping talk.