‘We were the most attractive people in that club’

[jacobmib]

Said the man I’m dating when telling me about a certain time when he was visiting a certain city and he and his group of friends went to a club and skipped the long queue because they were good looking.

Granted there was apparently a very hot (his words) woman in the group and he says it was mainly because of her that they manage to skip the queue but once there he realised that they were the most attractive people in that club.

BTW I don’t find him conventionally attractive. He is in his mid 50s now and this happened 10 - 12 years ago so we are not talking about a teen boy here.

Got the ick now.

And yet when a woman posts on MN about how attractive she is, anyone who takes the piss gets accused of trying to dent her confidence.

Good on him if he's confident in his looks, as long as he kept his opinions about it to himself.

Oh no!

Just realise it is IABU, it was meant to be for the Relationship board

Will ask to be moved

Have you not read about the Blitz scene, it was all like that in those days, only the good looking got in

Same with Studio 54, thats what they're like

He didn't though, he felt he had to tell the woman he was dating about it 12 years after it happened.

OP I made the mistake of going clubbing at 30 and felt completely ancient so I'm amazed there are clubs where 40 year olds are considered cool and beautiful enough to skip queues. He sounds like a bit of a dick tbh.

10 years ago?

He didn't though, he felt he had to tell the woman he was dating about it 12 years after it happened.

Which is fine, we're all allowed to chat and reminisce.

I meant kept his opinions to himself in the actual club and not go round telling everyone about it 🤣🤣

At the danger of being called a drip feeder I realised context is needed:

We live in England. We were talking about what other places we would be happy to move to (not together) just a simple conversation topic about the UK.

He mentioned that he would only move to this other city as it ticks almost all his boxes except people there are not interesting looking…
I then pressed him to tell me more and as an example he came out with what was described in the OP.

So yeah, a whole city - a night out sample - a decade ago.

What I dislike about it is the idea that he was weighing up everyone else in the club, male and female, and assessing their level of attractiveness. It's irrelevant what conclusion he reached - what sort of person does that?

what sort of person does that?

Inquiring minds need to know

With a few exceptions, isn’t this exactly why nightclubs exist: so that people can eye up the attractive people around them, gauge who their competition is and who they fancy the most, and decide who they’d like to sidle over towards to dance and make out with and possibly take home?

He was the most attractive person ( or one of them) in a club and he was 40! Really? What sort of club was this? And quite frankly what a strange thing to say. So he thinks the city is great but it’s full of mingers 😂.

No Im just talking generally that some clubs are like that, its the scene. Yes I am going back in the day a bit!

The people on the doors normally.

You're either in or you're not.

Eye up the people around them, yes, but not rate every single person in there!

He wasn't the door person, though.

Yes, there's been some terrible tales over the years of people being deemed not attractive enough to get into some clubs and restaurants.

Unless they're millionaires of course...

Hardly terrible tales, thats what clubs are for. I remember in my young days, you did your best to get in, you glammed up like no ones business

They are what they are. I was just answering the query as to what sort of person eyes up everyone else, well mainly everyone there but particularly the people in charge of judging whether you get in or not.

Dont know if its the same now, or if nightclubs even exist in that way! Too old

Was the club the over 50s book club or something? Maybe my mum's social club?

So cringe 🥲
My ex had a form for saying shit like this. ‘We are the hot couple by the pool’ umm…🤢 Honestly, we were NOT that hot, and especially not him

Firstly, I wouldn't want to go to that sort of club.

Secondly, he's a bit of a twat, isn't he?

Me, for the 20-odd years I worked in fashion & media. It was just a reflex as a consequence of living in a world that revolves around the looks of things (and people). I wouldn't have thought in terms of "most attractive" but definitely "interesting" looking or what you might call stylish. I never had to queue for a club through the '80s.

Though I look like an old sack of spare parts these days, I'm still fascinated by and appreciative of beauty, creativity, etc. I'd say a bit of healthy narcissism's good for the soul - I can't say whether this guy's overly narcissistic but he might be!

You're allowed to get the ick for any reason, though.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Some clubs still have door pickers. I don't think they're common in the UK though.
You
You
You

Not you
No...
😂

Erm, isn’t that most people who go to a club and are looking for,’or even fantasising about, a hook-up! You assess very quickly who you fancy, and who the competition is!… Isn’t that just natural “mating”
behaviour?

I find this very weird indeed. It's a bloody long time since I went clubbing, but my motivations were excellent music and, well, drugs to be honest. I wanted somewhere I could lose myself in the music and dance my arse off. One of my favourite places was the Jazz Rooms in Brighton- really tiny place that played acid jazz and funk. It was one of the only Brighton clubs where you could wear trainers in the 90s. It wasn't a glam-up kind of place at all. Folks were in jeans and trainers- it was about the music and the good vibes. And the drugs 😂

I did meet some hot men there though from time to time.

Forgive my irrelevant reminiscences but clearly my experiences of clubbing weren't the same as what's described here.

As for the man the OP is talking about- sounds like a shallow twat and I would have the immediate ick.