How to split the bills?

[Herewegoagain22]

My partner is due to move into my property which I own and the mortgage is in my name. Zero plans to add him to it. We have agreed to split all bills 50:50, incl food, council tax, utilities, broadband etc etc. I will continue pay the full mortgage since the house is mine and any repairs/insurances I will handle too. Does this seem reasonable? It feels messy asking for contributions to the mortgage when it isn’t his and if god forbid anything happens down the line, there is nothing he can come back with. Ideally we will buy together in a few years and if I come to sell my house I’d like all proceeds and anything I make on the house to be mine and then we buy together with everything completely 50;50.

what’s everyone’s thoughts?

No splitting, just he pays you rent to include bills
NEVER
have a joint account or let him pay any bills at all in his name
it’s your property not his needs to stay that way
keep it clean and safe from the outset

As unromantic as it sounds I would get a cohabitation agreement drawn up by a solicitor before he moves in. I would also have discussions about housework and general life admin.

Yes sorry when I say bills I just mean, I’ve tallied up all bill totals minus the mortgage then split it 50% and that’s what I’m asking him to contribute. Not that he is paying physical bills

Why should the man be allowed to live rent free though?

I think he should pay... eg. Lodger rates. This you can put aside for running repairs (roof, heating, new appliances as they break etc). No one ever believes it on these threads when you say that things wear out and look tatty quicker the more people you have using the house but it is what I've found).

I think asking him to pay 50% of the bills, food etc is the right thing
Because you’re paying the mortgage, it would be nice if he paid a bit more for luxuries - nights out, holidays etc

I think this seems fair

I'd be asking for more than 50/50. As it stands he will be paying less than you to live in the same house.

Plus you can guarantee you'll end up doing more house work/wife work because women always do!

Sounds fair to me
He's not actually a lodger and you're not doing this to make money

That all sounds fair.

He should be putting the equivalent of rent into a savings account so that if you split up he can easily rent somewhere of his own and move out quickly. If you don't split up he can use the money he has saved up towards the deposit on the property you will be buying together.

I was in this situation once. I asked for half of the bills and looked how much a room cost in my area and asked for that too (£400). As I wouldn't expect to live for free in someone else's house. That's the only way it felt fair from my side. He worked and earned so why not?

Agreed.

I have previously been in this situation too, we rented together before I bought so it felt fairer to roughly split bills 50:50 (as your mention, less the ones specific to owning a house eg insurance) and the interest part of my monthly mortgage payments. The interest worked out much cheaper than rent and we were fairly equal on our monthly income. Legally speaking I was taking a risk, but we did split and nothing terrible has happened.

Agree also.
Otherwise living together benefits him massively more than you, which isn't fair. You should start on an equitable footing as far as possible.
He should want to contribute fairly.

I would say repairs and renovations etc would be at your cost though.
And would be wise to get a cohabitation agreement drawn up.

He should not be contributing ANYTHING towards the mortgage but bills should be 50/50 and meals out, short trips away etc he should be paying for IMO.

If he contributes to the mortgage, it can and will leave you in a very financially vulnerable position should you split and go your separate ways. I would also suggest a cohabitation agreement as well.

yes you will be paying more than you, but you will also be benefitting financially by paying 50% less of the running costs.

That's why cohabitation agreements exist.

In most cases the bills themselves are a smaller portion of the running costs than the roof over your head (ie mortgage or rent)
So for example in my case mortgage 800, bills 400. No way would I allow a dp to move in and only pay 200 a month to live.

It needs to be an arrangement that works well for you both, both practically and financially.

But he's sharing a bed with OP. I'm not sure that's equivalent of renting a room 😂

What is he currently paying?
Him moving into yours should be mutually beneficial to both parties.
So, for example if he is currently paying €800pm rent and €400 on utilities then he pays you €400 rent and €200 utilities. This allows him to save but you also get some rent and half your utilities paid.

Never incentivise a man to live with you because it's cheap/easy for him.

How will you ever know if he really wants to be with you, or is just with you because he saves money and time by doing so?

If your bills are currently £400 per month, you'll think him paying £200 will "save you" £200 per month, but it won't.

Your council tax will increase by 25%, your utilities usage will increase, your food shops, toilet roll purchases and all other sundries will increase.

The wear and tear on your property will increase.

He needs to contribute to all of that and 50% of all domestic labour.

Grown ups pay rent and bills and food, why should he get a free ride?

He needs to be paying rent and you need to it legally drawn up so he won’t have a claim on the house. I’m not saying he should be paying full market rate, but perhaps half would mean that you are contributing equally. So if a room in a house is £500 it’s fair to charge him £250 rent. That way you both benefit from the arrangement.

Yes I think this is much fairer.

I tend to think about this differently to most. Rather than equally dividing bills, I would think about equally dividing the financial benefit of living together.

With your current proposed set up, your financial gain is 50% of bills. This isn't a big true gain, because he will be consuming the food, electricity etc that goes into the bills. (Ie you wouldn't be paying as big bills if he weren't there). You will also lose your single council tax discount, and suffer the increased wear and tear on your house. And probably, let's be realistic, increased housework. So you could argue your benefit is basically zero. His benefit will be living rent free with no repair costs, while paying only bills that reflect what he directly consumes. Depends where you are in the country and what kind of property, but that could well mean you are benefiting 100-200 a month, while he is benefiting 600-700 a month. Why is that fair?

Assuming you are roughly the same salary, then work out what each of you would have to pay to live independently, then split the benefit of living together.

Can he set up a savings account with his old rent money. Nobody knows what will happen in the future. He should get himself a cushion. Get a written agreement in place, no different to signing a tenancy or mortgage.
I would say the same to anybody co habiting.
Be clear on his 50% contribution to running the house. Meals, laundry, cleaning and shopping.

Good luck and have fun!

Many people overlook that the property owner benefits from the increase in equity, while the other does not. Generally, the increase in equity—especially after renovations—consistently exceeds any rental income.

Situations like this often seem to leave a backdoor open for an easy exit, which is unsustainable in the long run. Personally, if I were in his position, I would look for signs of long-term commitment, such as marriage or purchasing a joint property. Otherwise, I wouldn't consider moving in.