How long does your MIL stay at Christmas?

[BulldogMumma]

Every year she comes on Christmas Eve and leaves on the 27th, her coming isn't an issue but she literally does nothing for the full 3 days.
For example, yesterday DP the kids and I were going for a walk, asked MIL to come, she refused.
While she's here she doesn't even make a cup of tea, offer to help with cooking, literally sits on the sofa for 3 days.
DP has told her many times to help herself to a drink or asked if she wants to help with cooking or clearing up but she refuses.
DP is about to drive her home, I can't wait to get my house back and get the hoover out.
She's a lovely woman but I hate having her to stay.
Anyone else?

My PILs would come for a fortnight if we'd allow it. I can't handle more than 3 nights.

They are awful house guests but it's not actually about them, I don't want anyone staying that long.

I used to get a regular speech from MIL about how her MIL used to come and stay for a fortnight every Christmas and summer and they'd all find the first week difficult and then the second was delightful. NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.

@crumpet apparently these days it seems you are a bad parent if not always 'doing activities/trips' with kids- or taking them to activities/ events- times I guess have changed- no wonder many parents are both skint and worn out and totally put on by kids with high expectations-

my in laws left yesterday after 3 nights. MIL also won't shower here. Can't understand why not especially as we changed the shower head for one that suited her better after her first complaints and bought a non slip mat.
I was very unwell before Christmas and there was lots of talk from MIL about helping when they came- in reality she did not do one single thing - she was supposed to help with veg prep but got up so late on Christmas day that I had to do it - even every single use of the kitchen tap required someone to assist her. I'm very fond of my in laws but won't do any more than 3 nights it's exhausting.

I don't think those are big asks at all! I'd never even go for dinner or a cup of tea with friends/family without offering to take my plate away etc. My brother has been staying with us for five days and has been enormously helpful, he'll just clear the plates without asking etc.

My lovely MIL would be wanting to cook, clean and spend time with the grandkids - I don't think the first two are necessary at all but you'd want someone staying with you to at least want to spend some time with you, especially with young children.

@BulldogMumma - you wrote "DP has said we're not doing it next year, he said that last year hence why she was meant to go to his brother and we still ended up with her"
Time for you to start saving so that you won't 'still end up with her'. Save for a lovely mini break away to the sun (or to the snow) and make sure that everyone knows you will not be around and you have asked a very close friend to house sit for you while you're away (so they don't try to use your home as a base for Christmas or as an overspill area for guests to stay). Then draw the curtains and make sure you turn your house alarm on and enjoy a new way to have Christmas.

I would collect on Xmas Eve and it would be dropping home on Boxing Day around noon. 100 miles is nothing.

Wouldn't expect a guests to help for three days but generally not doing anything and sitting like a lump brings nothing to hosts.

Better still, next year book to go away and start with the shorter host the following year.