I met a man over two months ago through online dating. Everything seemed fine. By month 2 we got heavy in the sheets and I go to give him a hand job and nothing was happening. Did some dry humping. Nothing he never got hard. Now at the end of month 2 it's the same thing. Hand job, blow job, attempted sex, nothing.
I'm quite forward these days and like to talk things out. I had to tell him to see his doctor a few weeks ago. He did thankfully. I doubt he would've went if I didn't say anything. I'm 42F he's 40M. The other day I couldn't take it anymore and msged him that we should talk about us and our compatibility. I let him know that I'm was worried about what's going on with the ED and thatI was feeling like I wasn't turning him on. We also have some other things that make us incompatible (level of activity/sports).
I know he feels emasculated and scared. He hasn't dated in like almost 10 years which has me now raising an eyebrow. He also said at one point he was masturbating to porn daily for like a year. And now if he masturbates he can't even make himself get hard or cum. This is worrying.
He also has some mental health stuff that he should chat through with a counselor. Penetration sex is my thing as I don't like oral (I have a shorter urethra and get UTI easier). I will give oral but I don't want to receive.
I think I just needed to write this out and tell myself it's okay to leave him. 2 months in and I'm very worried about a sexless relationship for me and him being not satisfied or needing a deathgrip to get off. I can't help him but I also can't wait.
I wish there was more conversation among men about ED so they would get answers sooner than later. This guy is worthy of love but he's got some mental health stuff and ED to get through on top of some other behaviors I'm now noticing.