I (32 F) have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. Have lived together for 18 months. Throughout the relationship my partner has never posted me/ us on social media, despite using daily, although would post photos of himself on trips we had been away on together. I expressed how I found this strange and hurtful, however, he would become defensive and say it is his social media and he is not being controlled, made various excuses.
I also noticed he always slightly tilts his phone/ body away from me so I cannot see his screen.
I became suspicious and looked at his following, he has been following several women and has been liking their photos of them in bikinis/ small clothing. I had explained previously I found this type of behaviour disrespectful.
I confronted him calmly one evening recently, showed screenshots of what I’ve seen and asked to see his DM’s. He immediately became flushed and looked uncomfortable. He was very cagey, then admitted sexting two women. When I opened the messages he had been pretending to be single, asking several girls on dates over the course of the past year. One he had met at the gym and seemed to be pursuing her until she told him she had met someone. He denies anything physical happening. Also invited one girl to meet him when staying at a hotel alone on a work trip a couple of months ago.
He really wants to work things out and has offered to pay for couples counselling. He has sent me flowers this week and has been making small visible efforts in reconnecting. He also told me he was planning to propose in November, no ring bought.
other information - he told me previously his last two relationships ended when the woman cheated and that he would never cheat. I have also been struggling this year coming to terms with supporting and caring for mum diagnosed with fast progressing dementia in her 50’s with little family support (diagnosed February). This also led to a depressive episode I have started medication for.
What would you think about this all? I am struggling to think clearly and would appreciate any advice/ words of wisdom. Do you think it is possible to work things out? I feel so betrayed and like the trust is broken.