Handhold me again please support me

[Dodgybehaviour6666]

If you read my post last night you will know its me.
I've just found my boyfriend on a fake Facebook profile tonight after another argument. He's following a mature women to date page (I'm 35) and all these women are looking for relationships and wanting to take the relationship over to whatsapp.
I've tried calling him but due to our argument he's silent. He won't respond. I've just sent him a screen shot off the page I've caught him on and said I feel such a fool.

How do I end it now when he's just started medication? He's been recently diagnosed with bipolar and bpd. Yes I've wrote on here before. I'm really suffering tonight from intense distress at him harming himself. He told me earlier I'm all he's got and without me he has no purpose left. He's also being evicted by his landlord. I just cannot cope with what I've seen tonight.

Please please tell me what to do

You tell him it is over. You cannot trust him and relationships need trust if they are to work.

His health is his responsibility. Direct him to his GP or the Samaritans who are trained in giving the correct support. If he calls you threatening self harm then tell him you will call an ambulance/police and then hang up. He will only do this to you the once.

He's also being evicted by his landlord.
Do NOT let him move in with you. Not even for one night.

Exactly this OP. He is not your responsibility.

Because he's gone silent I'm already scared he's taken too many tablets. I'll be blamed and I've not sent any nasty messages but I have sent truthful ones because he's hurt me and is hurting me..he's lying to me and I know he is. I dont want to feel like this anymore.

Just block him.

I don't want to deal with him.anymore. but I don't want the anxiety I have now.

If I block him I get scared he will try ring me. He did ring his ex when he had overdosed 6 years ago. She did save him.

Am I being abusive looking at his social media fake page and sending him pictures of the page he's following (mature women looking for love) it's just sleazy and so hurtful to me. Or is he entitled to have fun like that in private and Am I invading his privacy?

I feel like im giving him so much aminition to say look how crazy she is..she's accusing me of allsorts..but it's true I know something is odd.

This will sound harsh but delete/block and move on. Feel free to ignore his 'bipolar diagnosis'. Feel free to ignore him like he's ignoring you. (NB: the kids call this ghosting - go for it)

You don't owe him anything at all. You are not married and probably never will be. So someone else is his next-of-kin. Let them step up to play their part.

As the other threads say, 'block and ignore'. Don't bother to find out whether he's been evicted - it's not your problem and someone else will deal with it. Delete his contact info now so you won't know. It's NOT your responsibility.

Errm, if you don't mind cheating being his fun, then sure let him go ahead

Is he entitled to? Of course. His freewill is his to do with what he wants. Should you put up with it? Absolutely not.

No, you're not abusing him. If you're supposed to be in an exclusive relationship, he's being abusive (not to mention manipulative!) - all you've done is found him out in a lie and confronted him with it. There is no need for you to be anxious. End the relationship now - he's given you good reason to do so. It's time for him to grow up. He is NOT your responsibility.

Of course you are not being abusive, you have discovered he is cheating, and you have every right to end the relationship. He's most likely silent because hes chatting to these other women. Like pps have advised block and delete.

Then block him. After that you make an appointment with either your GP or a therapist (or both).

You cannot fix him. You cannot change him. But you can fix yourself (anxiety) and you can change yourself (therapist). Look after yourself first. You are important too.

It'd not normal or health behaviour in a relationship from either of you and it sounds fairly toxic. He doesn't work, has no friends, treats you badly. What's the point.

I want to be strong enough.
I am a normal person it's just I have had to find answers to hos strange behaviour. I need to see it for what it is now. He's having fun online and looking at other women. So he's clearly not fulfilled by me.

Block, block, delete, block.

You are clearly not all he has got given he is following these other women, creating different Facebook accounts and who knows what else.

His health is his own concern and nobody elses, if he harms himself then that is down to him. Yes ring an ambulance/police if he somehow contacts you saying he has done something, but any decent person would do that.

Get yourself free from this drama.

And you will never be fulfilled by him. Do what you need to do to protect yourself - end it now. No ifs, not buts, just end it for the sake of your own mental health and self-esteem.

I'm so sorry, OP.

But you need to block him and ignore him.

An ex is not your responsibility and his actions have made himself an ex. Stop trying to save him, it will be at your expense. How did the story of his ex allegedly 'saving' him not give you a big red flag notification? Just don't even get involved with someone who tells you they've tried to OD in the past. That's a big reason to keep away. I'm sure he's now got you thinking " his ex saved him, so I should too", well no. If it makes you feel better, don't dump him officially, just don't contact him, don't check if he's OK, don't give him attention.

This!

You need to stop being drawn into his drama. This relationship won’t work & I think you know it’s not healthy

OP, you need to attend to your own mental health. He is online looking for a new relationship. He is showing you that he doesn't want to be with you anymore, but you are completely unwilling to accept that. Yes, it hurts, but one person trying to hold on to nothing while the other is looking for a new shag is not a workable relationship. It's over, OP. Please get some help.

I see he's got a pattern then ?
Can't you see this for yourself OP ?

Him doing all this stuff is nothing to do with you.

If you had sex 3 times a day....he'd still be doing what he's doing.

He's the one with the issues and you can't fix him.