Morning all,
This is kind of hard for me to write and its long winded but I'll skip out the long explanation of why it happened. But it's happened and I genuinely believe there's no going back now. My kids have said they don't want to be associated with her anymore as a result.
Over the years she's fallen out with many members of the family - even her own kids at times - and she's been quite biased when it comes to the Grand kids too - she definitely has her favourites and makes it's so obvious that it's quite sickening tbh. She's got 10 grandkids altogether.
Myself and OH have caught her out lying about allsorts several times and when confronted about it, she's always been in denial about any wrong doings and blames everyone else for what's happened.
We've got 3 kids, 2 girls aged 22 and 15 and a son who's 17. She's made it obvious that she favours our son over our Daughters as she'd spoil him rotten then give the girls "leftovers". Which then caused problems in our house. She'd come down to ours with a bag full of new clothes for our son but then bring a skipping rope and a hoolahoop for our youngest Daughter (who was only 9 at the time) and tell her to get out in the garden with them and skip because she was "too fat". You can probably imagine how my poor DD felt. It was heartbreaking.
She'd come to our house snooping round the bedrooms after pretending to go to the loo, she'd sit and slate everyone and I mean everyone. Even BILs 2 youngest kids. She'd say they were fat, they were pains in the backside, one of them is thick as pig poo. But we never ever told anyone because it would cause endless crap that we don't want or need. She's slated BILs new girlfriend and her kids. Said his girlfriends a liar and her kids think they're something special. But later that same week she'd be out having lunch with them.
She started bribing our son with money too. Told him if he brought a cup and plate out of his room that she'd give him 20 quid. She even told him she'd give him 50 quid if he took his acne meds every day for a month (he was taking them every day anyway) but he wasn't allowed to tell us or his sisters. Obviously I found out, I always do. And I begged her to stop. Because it was getting to a point where he was wanting money out of us for doing stuff ie cleaning his bedroom. I told her he should want to keep his room clean, he shouldn't expect money everytime I tell him to clean his room. She made life soooo hard for us and the arguments that came with her bribery were ridiculous.
She'd be down at our house 5 days a week because she was bored and we felt like we couldn't breathe. If I was going anywhere ie shopping and I wasn't in when she came down, she'd get on about it and be ringing me asking how long I was going be and then not speak to me for a week. But then she'd tell SIL that we never went to see her and only went when we wanted something. But she'd told us SIL didn't like us, she was sick of SIL bossing her about and saying she wasn't allowed to buy our kids anything. Which obviously got our backs up with SIL because our kids are her Grandkids too.
I told my OH that she'd cause major trouble one day and he agreed. It was just a matter of when.
Then it happened.
Everything that she'd been lying about to SIL when we went on holiday last year .( SIL came along as she was in process of leaving hubby no2.) came to a head. SIL threatened my OH, pushed our eldest DD and threatened to smash her face in, then threatened DS and youngest DD. And we had a HUGE falling out. All MILs lies came out and she blamed SIL at first, said she knew she was going to cause trouble on holiday and wish she'd never asked her to come. Then SIL and MIL were arguing. SIL calling MIL a narcissist. OH and FIL had to stop her. Then MIL rang one of the other Granddaughters telling her that our eldest DD had been talking about her (she'd not said a word!) so she rang DD kicking off.
Next day however, SIL and MIL were fine and stopped speaking to us.
We left the holiday the next day and came home and we've not spoken since.
MIL has seen DS a couple of times and told him SIL was out of order, she does her head in, and then proceeded to tell DS about SILs first hubby and how she chooses stupid men bla bla bla. She's not spoke to DS again since even when she's seen him. She saw youngest DD the other day and stared straight through her as though she didn't know her. FIL was coming to see us regularly but he's not allowed because MIL said so. Her reasons being because we didn't buy her a birthday card. Bearing in mind her birthday was 3 months after the fall out and she said she didn't want to speak to us for the rest of her life.
Our kids are missing out on so much but tbh they don't care. They've said they don't want to be associated anymore. They miss their Grandad so much but not Nannan. I'm beginning to think SIL was right when she called her a narcissist. DS starts an engineering apprenticeship in 2 weeks. They don't even know. They'll only get to find out if I put something on social media or if BIL tells them. BIL we see regular, he's been ace. He's had loads of issues with MIL in the past himself and he's tried to smooth things over for us because he says she's being pathetic but it got him nowhere. Then she accused him of stealing out of her house (he didn't!) because he was sticking up for us and told MIL that SIL was a trouble causer too.
I'm done trying with that woman and OH and kids are too. Life's a lot more peaceful since she's not been speaking to us. I knew this would happen one day. And I was right. And she's got nobody else to blame but herself. She's still snooping on us because BIL told us. It's just kids are missing out on cousins etc because she's poisoned them against us too.