How to manage a partner who is defensive

[Thanksforchatting]

Just don’t know what more to do but how do i manage a partner who is defensive and always thinks im “getting at him” when i say something?
it can be anything from me asking if he could pick up his pants from the floor for future (i get a defensive I don’t normally do it” to me asking what time dinner may be and he assumes im questioning him on why its late for example.
its exhausting

Maybe it wasn't ideal to yell at your daughter, but if she was being rude and selfish, perhaps she needed to be told.

He is overreacting, it's not emotional abuse, it is educating your child about what behaviour is acceptable and what is not. You are not calling her names, or insulting. Just calling out her behaviour. Don't be put down by him x

Yes he does not seem to accept responsibility for things but likes to point out what I do wrong.
so it would be me “could you please move xyz as it’s been there a week” and i get back “ well you left xyz in the hall..” - even though there has been a reason for my xyz that we have discussed. Hope that makes sense lol

Talk about keep you in your lane!

You’re walking on eggshells already lest he kick off and now you’re being patronised for daring to tell a 16 year old about their behaviour.

I would say lay down and go to sleep now but actually you are better than all of this. Refuse to engage with this, get out while you can before you’ve been completely gaslit into submission and you don’t know which way is up