Women's opinion: engagement ring

[ThirtySomethingDad]

I really wasn't sure which topic to post this under! I hope I'm close enough!

What do women feel about being given an engagement ring set with a lab grown diamond?

There seems to be a lot of snobbery about this, with some people even calling them fake diamonds, which they're just not - they're structurally and chemically identical and if you get a top quality lab diamond, you need special equipment to tell them apart! Seems to me that all you're paying extra for is the length of time it took to make. But I'm a man, what do I know?!

I can afford a natural diamond but my partner isn't remotely materialistic.

What would be your personal feelings?

Is this moissanite the lab grown stone?

I personally wouldn't want any type of diamond.

So I agree with the stunt ring idea

They aren't the same thing

I have a lab-grown diamond, I dont think anyone would know by looking at it. My DH designed my ring with a jeweler and it's 100% me, I couldn't have picked better if I had a choice

I wouldn't buy a diamond thinking about resale value - jeweller mark ups are astronomical and their prices don't reflect what you'd actually get if you were selling the diamond.

What do women feel about being given an engagement ring set with a lab grown diamond?

Thats like asking what do ‘women’ think about the war in Palestine, abortion or euthanasia.

Women aren’t one group of people all thinking the same thing and the only thing that matters here is what your partner thinks.

Women are all different. As pp said get a stunt ring and let her choose her own after.

A lab grown diamond is more ethical but also you can't tell them apart to the naked eye if have no problem with a lab grown diamond

I wouldn't bother with a stunt ring. I'd just propose and then plan a nice day out to shop for one.

Having said that, some women still want their partner to choose the ring as it's 'traditional', in which case that advice is useless.

As far as lab grown diamonds are concerned, they're far more ethical and it wouldn't bother me at all but, OP, as has been pointed out, women are not one homogenous group.

You know your girlfriend and what sort of woman she is. We don't.

DH and I chose my ring together I don’t think lab grown diamonds were a thing almost 27 years ago.

It seems romantic proposing with a ring whatever it’s made of but really I think choosing it together is best as she has to wear it hopefully forever.

Let her choose her own, ir or go ring shopping together. It's not Victorian times.
Good luck with the other issues.

I don't understand why you're marrying a woman who doesn't enjoy sex with you.
On your other thread you go into great detail about this.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/5165379-how-often-is-normal

I wouldn't want a lab grown diamond, or a natural diamond. I find modern diamond rings are boring.
I do love different coloured gemstones, particularly green sapphires which are simply stunning.
A trick is to find a stone that compliments the wearers eyes and the metal that compliments their skin tone.
I'm also not against vintage, and antique rings which were much more styled than they are today. Have a look at Edwardian and Art Deco engagement rings for inspiration.

I’d prefer a lab grown diamond. I wouldn’t want an engagement ring with a natural diamond due to the human rights issues around the diamond mining industry. My engagement ring isn’t a diamond for that reason.

Assuming you are buying this for your partner though, have the conversation with her about what she wants. I wouldn’t have wanted any ring sprung on me without having a choice as it’s something she’ll have forever. Dh and I bought the stone for my ring and designed it together, though I never saw the actual ring before he proposed. I love it and I’ve worn it every day since (that was 14 years ago).

My engagement ring is green sapphire. It's beautiful.

A lab grown diamond would be perfectly fine for me. I do think she might like to be consulted though.

My husband proposed without a ring, and we used a £3 paua shell ring I had bought earlier in the day. Some women care about expensive jewellery, I’m not one of them, but I think the stunt ring idea is pretty cool so she can choose her own (or stick with the cheapo one for sentimental value like I did!).

I prefer vintage (my engagement ring is my great grandmother’s ring restyled) but as an alternative I’d would go for a lab diamond every time - far more ethical.

I wouldn't be happy with lab grown personally, they feel a bit cheap to me as a gift unless they're huge, then it's obvious it's lab grown but if I was buying my own diamonds I'd probably go lab grown and modestly sized.

Lab grown is more ethical than a natural diamond.
Have you considered a vintage ring?

Depends if your partner would like it?
I've worked in the diamond and watch industry for nearly 18 years. My DP will be getting me lab grown because it's pretty much the same thing, just in a lab...and about 50-80% cheaper and always a better quality.
Also get it from Hatton garden or Birmingham jewellery quarter. The 'big stores' always add about 60% on top.
Last time I went to JQ in Bham, a 2ct oval in platinum was just shy of 2k...not sure about your budget but that's about how much it should be for those kind of requirements.

Good luck!

I find the concept of engagement rings rather sexist, to be honest and don’t have one.

You’ve got 3 kids together. Surely at some point in the last 15 years you’ve had a discussion about marriage? Not sure I get the point of a proposal or an engagement when you’ve built a life and a family already. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Honestly you should just ask her how she feels. Everyone's got different opinions. My now fiancé and I had conversations about it and it didn't ruin the surprise.of the proposal or ring itself. I love my lab grown ring, it's stunning