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Original poster

Does he hate me?

47 replies

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:05

Me and this guy were seeing each other and it ended bad ,we had thid weird situation for about 19 months.
He did the bad things to me,I did him no wrong.
After we broke up,stupidly we started speaking even tho we knew to stay away.
Eventually we cut ties,I deleted him off social media except for Facebook -I just deleted my account.
It's been 4 years now and I'm engaged and live with my fiance and we have just bought a house.
I'm in a good place and I reactivated my Facebook.
Uploaded some recent pics of us and started using my Facebook.
My ex was still on my fb and after 4 years all my upset was gone and I didn't feel the need to remove him.
Anyway he viewed my stories and after a week deleted me.
I don't understand why -he has all his ex's and one night stands on his Facebook
He even told me he keeps all his ex's on as he has no reason to delete.
One of the girls he slept with in mutual fb friends and he wished her happy birthday.

When we were first together it was great and I know we had something good but he ruined it
I did nothing for him to hate me.
I know it's not significant
It just makes no sense

OP posts:
invisiblecat · 02/09/2024 20:09

Why are you assuming it is hate?

Original poster
charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:10

@invisiblecat there's nothing else it could be

OP posts:
ILikeItWhatIsIt · 02/09/2024 20:17

I doubt he hates you, he's just not interested in you anymore. Sounds like you're still interested in him though!

Catlord · 02/09/2024 20:18

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:10

@invisiblecat there's nothing else it could be

That's jumping to conclusions. Doubt it's that intense.

4 years is a long time.

Maybe he's changed his policy on keeping exes as SM friends.

Perhaps he has a new partner who doesn't like it.

Maybe if you've started posting regularly he's deleted you rather than see constant news from someone he doesn't speak to to now.

Might feel complicated about you being engaged (guilt about treatment?) so has removed it from his sight with no ill will?

Why assume hatred?

DaughterNo2 · 02/09/2024 20:23

ILikeItWhatIsIt · 02/09/2024 20:17

I doubt he hates you, he's just not interested in you anymore. Sounds like you're still interested in him though!

This! Just move on

FinallyHere · 02/09/2024 20:25

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:10

@invisiblecat there's nothing else it could be

I can think of lots of reasons it might be, including that His current friend/partner/girlfriend could be jealous and force him to delete you.

Whatever the reason, it says nothing about you and everything about him. He's not paying you any rent, just don't give him any space in your head

Original poster
charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:39

It's not even that I care anymore
And he does still have all his ex's and one night stands /fwb on there so it's nothing to do with jealous new partners
Also his new gf wouldn't know any of us anyway

OP posts:
probster · 02/09/2024 20:49

he had the briefest of nose
and then left
i did the same with all my exes… even my first boyfriend from 25 years ago

no biggie op
but i have a feeling… you hoped it might mean something?

probster · 02/09/2024 20:50

maybe he thinks you have boiler bunny tendencies

Loseitlikelollo · 02/09/2024 20:52

It doesn’t matter, you may be one of many exes he’s decided to delete from his Facebook, but ask yourself why you’re even bothered? That is the important question.

probster · 02/09/2024 20:53

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:39

It's not even that I care anymore
And he does still have all his ex's and one night stands /fwb on there so it's nothing to do with jealous new partners
Also his new gf wouldn't know any of us anyway

you have supposedly had nothing to do with him for 4 years

so how do you know this?

EVHead · 02/09/2024 20:54

Why do you even care enough to spend time wondering?

FoxtrotOscarKindaDay · 02/09/2024 20:54

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:39

It's not even that I care anymore
And he does still have all his ex's and one night stands /fwb on there so it's nothing to do with jealous new partners
Also his new gf wouldn't know any of us anyway

You wouldn't be posting a thread about it if you didn't care.

You shouldn't care. He's gone from your life, you are with someone new. Move on and forget about him, it's been years.

GLC789 · 02/09/2024 21:16

He probably assumed you'd blocked him 4 yrs back due to you deleting your account.

All of a sudden you pop upon his stories. He views, intrigued, realises he doesn't care what you get up to, deletes you. This is perfectly normal.

The fact you even noticed that firstly, he was still on your friends list, secondly viewing you stories, and finally noticing he deleted you speaks volumes. You are not over this guy for some reason.

Shake yourself off my love, purge him out and be happy in your current situation x

Original poster
charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 21:30

I have moved on but I can't help but think
I have random people on my Facebook
People who I've never spoke to in my life
People who walk past me in the street
Unless he hated me ,there would be no reason
He has thousands of fb friends

OP posts:
etalocohCtoH · 02/09/2024 21:42

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 21:30

I have moved on but I can't help but think
I have random people on my Facebook
People who I've never spoke to in my life
People who walk past me in the street
Unless he hated me ,there would be no reason
He has thousands of fb friends

So what if he does? What if it’s exactly as you think? How does that affect your current life? Why do you care so much? Do you still have feelings for him?
Move on and focus on your new family. Don’t let this affect the life you have now.

strawberry2017 · 02/09/2024 21:44

I don't think you have moved on as much as you think. You have to physically check that someone's in your friend list which means you have been checking.
Why?

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 02/09/2024 21:48

He doesn't want to see you and your new bf. Presumably he is jealous in some way. I assume for whatever reason that's what you want us to say, it's the only logical explanation really, given that you say he keeps his other exes etc.

The worrying thing is why you've created a thread to be told that - sounds like you're too interested in his emotions. Are you sure you're being fair to your fiancé? If you're still hung up on the ex then you're not really being fair. No criticism of you if you are hung up on him, sometimes the nastiest ones can be the hardest to move on from.

PyongyangKipperbang · 02/09/2024 22:12

Why do you care? IF you have moved on and are in a good place, why are you even noticing that he has deleted you?

Sounds like you havent moved on as much as you think, which isnt very fair on your fiance and it may be time for some counselling to unpick your feelings on this so you stop giving him rent free space in your head.

TheBottomsOfMyTrousersAreRolled · 02/09/2024 22:14

He saw that you are engaged and happy and so there is nothing in it for him anymore.

PyongyangKipperbang · 02/09/2024 22:18

TheBottomsOfMyTrousersAreRolled · 02/09/2024 22:14

He saw that you are engaged and happy and so there is nothing in it for him anymore.

Yeah, my ex husband was always big about being "friends" with his exes. Turns out a lot of the women he cheated on me with were his exes.

They were not his friends, they were potential leg over opportunities. Now you have removed yourself from the dating pool, you are not going to shag him so no point in keeping you on SM.

invisiblecat · 02/09/2024 23:02

charmedimsyre · 02/09/2024 20:10

@invisiblecat there's nothing else it could be

Why?

paradisecircus · 02/09/2024 23:31

Try to think about this as little as possible, OP. You've both moved on.

Mom2K · 02/09/2024 23:47

This is a weird thing to be posting about if you don't care.

If he hates you, so what? What difference does that make at all to your life now? Why give it any headspace at all?

PolePrince55 · 03/09/2024 00:29

He sees a bad side to himself when he sees you.
A side he perhaps wants to forget.