Page 4 | Boyfriend’s comment gave me the ick

FemurRobinson · 02/08/2024 11:55

I would think it was a fairly stupid reason to dismiss the idea of ever going to an enormous country, and think he was probably a bit thick, but, particularly having lived longterm in places often described as filthy and polluted, I'd be unlikely to last long in a relationship with someone who chose his travel destinations on the basis of litter.

InSpainTheRain · 02/08/2024 11:56

I have been to India 7 times on business for a few weeks at a time. Culturally it's wonderful, people are really friendly, great shopping, it's actually amazing. But one thing it's not is clean! I wouldn't get uptight over his comment.

KreedKafer · 02/08/2024 12:11

MrsTerryPratchett · 02/08/2024 00:05

I know the temperature is running high this week, but everyone getting trigger finger won't help at all.

Yes, the temperature is high this week. So maybe leaving it for a week would be a good idea.

And now the thread will turn from 'ewwwwwww India' to 'what racism, there's no racism, people call London filthy, nothing to see here guv'.

So

Predictable

Agree. It's faux-naive dog-whistling, and it depresses me that people don't realise it.

It's been absolutely rife on here over the past week or so.

Disturbia81 · 02/08/2024 13:49

InSpainTheRain · 02/08/2024 11:56

I have been to India 7 times on business for a few weeks at a time. Culturally it's wonderful, people are really friendly, great shopping, it's actually amazing. But one thing it's not is clean! I wouldn't get uptight over his comment.

All this.. even the Indians I know say this! It's a fact

Isitsixoclockalready · 02/08/2024 14:11

MrsTerryPratchett · 01/08/2024 23:39

Are we really going to have a thread of people calling a whole country 'dirty' and 'filthy'? MN is lousy with racism right now and I have the fucking ick.

Context is king I think. The post itself didn't reveal about the person apart from an isolated comment. It wasn't even like the OP said what his subsequent reply was.

immigrant002 · 02/08/2024 14:14

Siyasiyasiya · 01/08/2024 23:02

We were watching a programme on India and he said he never wanted to go because it looked “filthy”

I replied that was quite a bold thing to say about the whole country and he rowed back and said there were some areas that looked nice

but in a nutshell I feel quite put off by his point of view here

Thats a weird thing to get the ick about is common knowledge that some areas in india are very dirty due to over population and poverty

FoxtrotOscarFoxtrotOscar · 02/08/2024 14:19

A friend was in India, walking round a market. A bread/cake stand was empty, then a cow waltzed over to lick the tray. Instead of wiping it clean, the stallholder just replenished the stock!

Isitsixoclockalready · 02/08/2024 14:19

TBF he could be a snob - and he could well be racist but we have no way of knowing that from one isolated comment that's not even been followed up on. There is a lot of actual hate out there at the moment - some really nasty people and racism can take many forms but I think that it's really important not to use that phrase cheaply because it should be a powerful word.

TheaBrandt · 02/08/2024 15:09

I enjoyed the chaos and craziness of India as travelled round independently it was pretty down and dirty to be honest but liked that about it. It’s not Switzerland put it like that.

DreamTheMoors · 02/08/2024 20:00

INeedAnotherName · 02/08/2024 01:30

I am so sorry you are suffering from all these wildfires, they are horrible to see on the News and my heart goes out to all the people and wildlife displaced 💔

However I did mean clouds of dust in programmes. There always seem to be plumes of it behind trucks travelling the highways, or in Arizona/Nevada etc. Obviously it's not everywhere but it does give the impression of it being a dusty/filthy country in places. Then of course you get the programmes of the grizzlies in the beautiful mountains and rivers and suddenly it's not so dirty anymore, its one of the most beautiful places on earth. So it depends on which programmes are watched and where those programmes are focused on. I guess my roundabout point was any country can come across as filthy/dirty if certain areas are dry and dusty.

Show quote history

Why does dust equal filth to you?
Dust is just dust.

3CustardCreams · 02/08/2024 20:05

Nah some places are a bit grubby. For example I find Hong Kong quite dirty - whereas Singapore clinically clean. It’s true and no offence intended.

Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong · 02/08/2024 20:09

Freedom of speech really is gone if people can't express a view on the hygiene standards in a country without being called racist!!

It sounds like you don't like him and are looking for reasons to get rid of him. If he said a beach resort is tacky or people in a particular city are unfriendly would that bother you too? What about if his politics differ? Or views on a particular social policy? It's normal to have different views on different things and respect each other regardless.

sunsetsandboardwalks · 02/08/2024 20:10

DreamTheMoors · 02/08/2024 20:00

Why does dust equal filth to you?
Dust is just dust.

Show quote history

Probably because dust has a tendency to get everywhere and (imo) makes you feel grubby and dirty.

Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong · 02/08/2024 20:11

Freedom of speech really is gone if people can't express a view on the hygiene standards in a country without being called racist!!

It sounds like you don't like him and are looking for reasons to get rid of him. If he said a beach resort is tacky or people in a particular city are unfriendly would that bother you too? What about if his politics differ? Or views on a particular social policy? It's normal to have different views on different things and respect each other regardless.

saraclara · 02/08/2024 20:11

I travel widely and have been to India multiple times. It's simultaneously wonderful and filthy. Claiming that it's the same as any other country in being dirty 'in parts' is either naive or disingenuous.

My last trip ended in Kolkata, and I can't pretend that that, even after more than four decades of worldwide travel, I couldn't wait to get home, even though there were parts that were stunning. Unfortunately where I stayed, and most areas I walked through, were horrifically poor and dirty. It couldn't remotely be considered to, say, Manchester.

It makes me sad that people miss out on a wonderful country because they can't face the dirt and the poverty. But I can't tell then that their perception is wrong.

Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong · 02/08/2024 20:20

Oops posted twice, no idea why but I can't delete. Apologies.

Bibi12 · 02/08/2024 22:49

He stated a fact. India is beautiful and amazing but it is in many parts dirty.
I could not be with someone like you because I highly value critical thinking and we would just not be compatible. I don't like to pretend that white is black and could not stand to be told to distort my own thought process to fit someone's agenda.
It's a huge mind fuck when people like you feel self righteous when in reality you are in the wrong and other person did nothing to deserve to be almost gaslighted into "racist" (or other convenient box).
I also can't stand dirt and bad smells. This not a judgment on my part but rather a personal preference caused by my own sensitivity. Same way as other people don't like loud and crowded places or hot weather.

HauntedbyMagpies · 02/08/2024 23:29

Huh?! Your boyfriend has a different opinion than you and this gave you the ick?! You're gonna really struggle in the big bad world, OP