Boyfriend’s comment gave me the ick

[Siyasiyasiya]

We were watching a programme on India and he said he never wanted to go because it looked “filthy”

I replied that was quite a bold thing to say about the whole country and he rowed back and said there were some areas that looked nice

but in a nutshell I feel quite put off by his point of view here

You're in Canada aren't you?

I was. But it's not catching.

And yes, dog-whistling is exactly it. I'll report and find out.

Someone said a country was dirty they didn't say the people was dirty... maybe step away from online instead of screaming witch every 2 seconds.

As I grew up, I wondered how people were so stupid to burn "witches" and after recent events, such as Leeds/Manchester/ Rochdale/ Southport - I get it.

This would give me an ick that I couldn't come back from tbh.

But I was born in a country that I'm sure lots of people from rich countries like the UK might think is 'dirty' or 'dangerous' so maybe the type of person who makes comments like that wouldn't have gone on a date with me in the first place 😂

Just didn't want to want on about Reform and their shady ways.

Reform and their shady ways.

That would make a great name for a punk band.

We don't know OP's (alleged?) ethnicity yet.

Someone else said that about another of my posts yesterday. I must start a band quickly while I'm on a roll!

Maybe OP isn't coming back and there is something suss in it.

Why does OP's ethnicity matter? I was just giving an opinion from my perspective.

I mean @LiterallyOnFire is too.

Record company? A&R work?

I’ve been to India many times. It is for the most part quite dirty. There is an ornamental lake in Bangalore you could probably walk across. I saw a newborn being washed in the gutter in Mumbai. Delhi has appalling pollution. Kerala is lovely. It’s still full of litter though.

Tell him to have some compassion. Watch Baraka on youtube. Some of thats recorded in India. Not necessarily this bit but my goodness give it a watch and a listen:

Sounds like you're looking for an excuse to jump on the poor guy. India is stunning but often its portrayal on TV andin reality it looks dirty. I have a phobia of a certain animal often associated with disease and filth. I've never seen so many. That alone ensures I'll never return.

Did he mean filthy as in dusty? Every time I see programmes about India there seems to be clouds of dust but I also see that in programmes about America too. And yes, I would call some parts of America filthy based on that.

It would give me the ick too. He sounds like a bit of an ignoramus. Has he travelled much? What is he like in general?

That’s smoke from wildfires you’re seeing instead of clouds of dust in America.
We’re overwhelmed by them currently.
And no place is spotless, btw, or pristine any more — which may be the most depressing sentence I’ve written in a long while.
Take, for example, the Park Fire — which is now larger than 12 San Franciscos and is only partially contained.
I believe the smoke has traveled all the way into Canada and far into the other western US states.
Two days before the Park Fire started, Earth experienced it’s hottest day ever recorded. And I read something about Death Valley in California recording it’s hottest monthly average - 108+F - a world record.
Depressing.

Why does OP's ethnicity matter? I was just giving an opinion from my perspective.

I meant that maybe OP's BF iWAS perfectly happy to go out with "someone like you" (only you know which nationality or origin that is) and still said what he said for innocent or gormless or other reasons.

But I can see OP just bitch-plopped and left so maybe @MrsTerryPratchett is on to something about it being a dog whistle.

IRL people normally establish pretty quickly if their OHs are sexist or racist or homophobic or whatever (it's part of the getting to know you stage) and don't find it out from a random comment. So maybe he's fictional anyway.

True but she sounds a little white saviour-ish. The BF should be allowed to have a preference about where he wants to go on holiday.

I am so sorry you are suffering from all these wildfires, they are horrible to see on the News and my heart goes out to all the people and wildlife displaced 💔

However I did mean clouds of dust in programmes. There always seem to be plumes of it behind trucks travelling the highways, or in Arizona/Nevada etc. Obviously it's not everywhere but it does give the impression of it being a dusty/filthy country in places. Then of course you get the programmes of the grizzlies in the beautiful mountains and rivers and suddenly it's not so dirty anymore, its one of the most beautiful places on earth. So it depends on which programmes are watched and where those programmes are focused on. I guess my roundabout point was any country can come across as filthy/dirty if certain areas are dry and dusty.

What @LiterallyOnFire?

My original post was at 11pm so I went to sleep, I didn’t bitch plop…

It's so different now. There's more homeless people on the streets in the UK than when I went in 2021, I struggled to find people to give food to. Developing countries are getting richer.

Well he is right India is filthy

The thing with the filthy comment is its a bit misplaced - I lived in rural Africa and people were more hygienic than I was. Everyone had freshly washed clothes, everything was mopped down daily, people spent ages doing their hair etc. A lot of pride taken despite owning very little. Sanitation issues happen in places with no running water, or public toilets and obviously you have to be careful as there are things you can pick up from unwashed fruit etc. Cities can feel polluted because they are cities.

Ha, so true! Look how many British people wear their shoes inside or let their dogs like their faces

A misunderstanding of racism like this is dangerous. You have such strong views yourself as seen on numerous threads but take great enjoyment on making everyone else feel bad. Have you been to India? I've been. There is indeed a lot of places you need to watch your feet. Uganda however - another third world country - was exceptionally clean! There's a difference between racism and fact.

India is fascinating, beautiful, richly varied, shocking, overwhelming, full of delights and unquestionably the filthiest place I have ever been.