ok so, myself and a former colleague , recently started exchanging very flirtatious messages, we are both separated, and decided to start getting together for some no strings attached sex, this suited me after coming out of a long relationship and (like most men) suited him also, he is not my type usually ( a bit older, used to be my boss, a bit tall/lanky/geeky) but there is clearly a sexual attraction.
We didn’t meet up for a few weeks due to me working away, but during that time he was coming across very caring, messaging me to check on my well being etc. , despite me commenting he didn’t need to and this was all no strings attached, he said he cared about me, which I thought was sweet.
We have hooked up a few times for sex and sex only, and he was quite caring making sure I was 100% sure I wanted to go ahead etc., so it felt like a safe place etc, ( I know we are both adults but still it made me feel very respected).
We hooked up again at the weekend and I didn’t really hear from him after , I know its no strings attached but still he was always so respectful and caring before, I sent a jokey message earlier about the no contact and he kind of brushed it off and said something along the lines of ‘ I guess we cant always talk every day’ which he is right in saying , but he kind of set the precedent of all of the regular messages checking on each other’s wellbeing ETC at the start of this, I sent a bit of a huffy message pretty much saying let’s just set the expectations of only messaging for pretty much a booty call, which he said worked for him etc, but I kind of feel annoyed, why could he not be like that in the first place instead of setting such a high standard?
I have never really had a fuck buddy before, am I being a bit unreasonable.
Also another thing we have talked a lot about our sexual desires before hooking up and I said how I like it a bit rough(hair pulling etc) and he seemed really turned on by it and said how he loves being all dominant , however when it came to it, he wasn’t really like that, really gentle etc.
Should I just bin it all off because he’s not really satisfying me anyway ?
I just don’t get the change in behaviour. ( im sorry if I sound Naïve , ive only really had long term releationships so I’m new to all this sexual fantasy/nsa stuff)