I’ve got myself into a right mess and need some advice here.
Someone at work started showing an interest in me. It was very intense to start with, texting, calling, having lunch etc. we went out but nothing happened. We didn’t sleep together for a number of months and tbh the communication had got less. but the first time I told him I only wanted FWB (I put my barriers up to stop myself getting hurt) but he seemed a bit taken aback when I said it, like he wasn’t expecting it and went really quiet on me for a week. So in my head thought maybe he does want more, tried to claw this back but I think at that point he’d put me in the Fwb category as shut me down. Because I’d let my barriers down, this also really hurt and I knew deep down I shouldn’t carry on but couldn’t let go. Found out he was seeing someone but he’d still ask when I was available etc. he told me they aren’t getting on at the moment. went round (stupidly) and now I feel really low because I know he doesn’t see me that way even though he’s said maybe we could go out sometime. he did also say a while ago he didn’t want to hurt me and we can stop but I said it was fine like an idiot.
If I didn’t work with him I’d go NC but it’s so hard at work, how the hell do you do NC at work? How do you stop the feelings. I just want to switch them off. Anyone been here.
also don’t want to leave, love working there, best job I’ve ever had. And why should I leave a job I love over a man.