Offer of a 'gift' from a guy

[Tillybud81]

So I've been messaging a guy for about 6 months, we've only met twice and it's actually even nothing romantic.

We share a hobby and I started following him on Instagram, then we started messaging, nothing too deep mostly about our hobby and occasionally about general life stuff. The chat's sporadic, sometimes a week with neither of us messaging. I've no idea of his relationship status because, as I say, nothing even remotely romantic or suggestive of has ever been said and I'm not interested in more than a friendship.

Anyway a week ago he messaged saying he'd ordered something for this hobby and I said oh I need the same thing, but it'll have to wait now as I need work doing to my car and I'm saving for a house. Out of the blue he offers to buy me this thing (considerable amount of money item) I decline saying it's ok I don't need it that bad I'll get it at some point, he insists saying he'll send them to me. We chat some more then he asks again about the item and I a little more forcefully say no, thank you for the offer but I don't feel comfortable accepting it. He's now since ghosted me, not blocked but not heard from him.

I'm not too worried about hearing from him, I wasn't THAT invested, but it was so weird and out of the blue.

What do you reckon he was thinking? Was he just genuinely trying to be nice and I've hurt his feelings. No one else would accept this surely

Maybe he feels he overstepped the mark and is embarrassed or awkward about that. And that's why he hasn't messaged. Have you messaged him since?

🤣😂🤣

I mean it's irrelevant to the post, but if it's driving you that mad it's motorcycles. So you were close

Op

dont be a wanker

Wanker accusations hereby withdrawn 😀😀

Ouch

OTT much…

Surfing, he was getting you a wetsuit or board. Maybe tri club - posh bike?

Yeah. I ain’t got time for coy hobbies

I used to have a Ducati 600 supersport back in the day… lovely red beast!

it was swinging

Well if nothing else I'm now laughing, a lot!! Thanks all

No I haven't, I messaged last with the polite but firm decline then just a trivial message about what else I was up to. He's read but no reply

Simple answer is that there are a lot of lonely guys out that don't get much attention from women, when you became 'hobby pen pals'? and was nice with him he probably thought/hoped it was/would become something more.

When he realised his mistake he backed off.

There's always some posters that think the absolute worst of people.

Awww you are FUN. I'm sorry for my earlier comment.

Why did he have to ghost her though?

😬

We don’t know she flirted, unless talking about how to remove a restrictor from a standard muffler gets his motor running…

So posters WERE right to think the worst of him? Despite what @PrickledMess said.... ?

Id say to avoid an awkward and embarrassing convo

Bit like the time I practically begged a gardener to deal with my small overgrown lawn and he said "I'll have to charge you 165 because of the weed cutting needed", I was expecting max 50 for such a small lawn

I went out and chopped all the weeds in 30 minutes and ghosted him😆

I mean you know as a motorcyclist that is classed as flirting 😂

But no there was no flirting, I've asked myself quite a few times 'what does this guy want' cos he's never once been a "sleeze" or even a flirt

Wrong, sorry to burst ya theory

Why don’t you come up and see me show me your Haynes manual sometime? 😂

But totally get you, I think maybe he read into it. I’ve had times when I’ve thought I have not flirted (and I could be in the Olympics for flirting if I wanted to be so I’m not a stranger to batting my lashes) so it is weird when they might have thought that what you put across as friendly vibes is something else.

But he could have read into something that wasn’t there, that’s kind of been my hypothesis (big word for a Sunday night, but I have had a Merlot!) from the start.

Oh bless you! Is that where your username comes from?! 😅😂