Hells Angel Wannabe OAP

[TheMerryWindow]

First time poster, but I could really do with some advice.

My 84 (and a half!) year-old mother has recently got it into her head that she wants a motor scooter. I don't mean a mobility scooter, we're talking a full on Mods n Rockers Lambretta kind of thing here. She used to own one when she was in her early 20s and has happy memories of riding it around. She hasn't ridden a motorcycle of any kind since then and has had numerous bumps and scrapes in her car - more since she went completely blind in one eye a few years back. So I'm worried she's going to end up killing/injuring herself and/or someone else.

I've voiced my concerns to her but she's undeterred and has emailed me a photo of the one she's intending to buy online. So she's not even going to be trying it out first! My DH suggested she goes on a training course before getting one, but she's extremely introverted and hates having anything to do with other people. I've offered to take her to a motorcycle dealers so she can at least take one for a test drive, but she's not up for that either.

So I'm thinking I might just have to resign myself to possibly receiving a phone call from the hospital/police one day telling me she's hurt herself or worse. WWYD?

Does she have a license to ride it?

Yes, she has driving license for a car, which would cover a motor scooter.

This could be my father in a few years. No advice really.

They seems to refuse to accept they are getting old and less able.

is there a police road safety team in your area? The police used to do a course for older bikers. Probably not as old as your mother

Suggest you sit down and work out the cost of the insurance first and maybe go to a showroom where she can sit in one.

I don't know about your DM but most 84 yos I know have difficulty getting in and out of the bath, never mind sitting on a Scooter.

Just wondering if her behaviour has changed in any way recently or is this lack of judgement par for the course with your DM?

She wouldn't go on a course, I'm afraid Hoosemover, because she doesn't like being with other people. In her words, "I don't like people."

She's very fit for her age, Cady, does all sorts of DIY jobs around the house. I hadn't considered cost of insurance - wonder if they'd pile it on because of her age? As to going to a showroom, I've offered to take her but she said she'd be too embarrassed! This sort of behaviour isn't unusual for her, she's always been a bit odd, though has definitely got odder as the years have gone by.

See how much the insurance is first. It might be too much. Also she may buy it and just not ride it - that's a very real possibility.

She will have to go to a motorbike accessory shop to buy her helmet though?

And yes, the insurance will be increasing year on year now that she's in her 80s.

Hopefully insurance will be prohibitive. Yes, she may well buy it and then not ride it, at least after the first try-out - hoping that'll be the case.

Am guessing she'll get a helmet online as well.

She sounds great tbh!

Is this a serious intention or just a bit of wistful fantasising?

Am guessing she'll get a helmet online as well

I'd definitely look at insurance with her and then if she's still interested send if she'll agree to going to an accessory shop so that she can pick out the perfect helmet

You wouldn't say that if you were lumbered with having her as a parent 😂
No, it's not just a fantasy, she really is intending to buy one.

Good idea, Cady. If the insurance cost doesn't put her off, maybe someone at the motorbike accessory shop will be able to.

Christ, she reminds me of me. Except I'm much younger. I became disabled young, and let me tell you, you become seized by weird ideas that you "must" do, to try and spite the fact that you're disabled (or in her case, very old). The impatience at reality, the feeling that you thought you had forever to do anything...it hurts, when freedoms are ripped away from you by circumstance.

The thought of having the choice to do something, having that choice taken away by age or infirmity can make for some bizarre actions.

I have no advice other than I guess to be prepared for her to hurt/kill herself if she really does get a scooter and lives anywhere except a sleepy village with no traffic ..But again, it's her life. Taking away the urge to spite reality can take the shine completely off someone's existence. It's a very hard situation!

That's interesting, Voowoo. I wonder if she's resenting getting older and feeling like time's running out for her. She took the sudden loss of sight in her eye very badly and won't admit how much her overall vision is affected by it. Maybe it's like you say, spiting the reality.

A car licence only covers her for a moped (under 50cc), and she'd still need separate insurance. A moped is also limited to 30mph.

Hopefully that would limit her ability to damage herself, but enable some fun too?

Are her eyes good enough for her to drive or ride a scooter?

The one thing that stopped my dad driving when he was very old was being reminded that he could kill someone with his car. His eyes were fine but his reactions were slow of course.

I do think it will only be a little pootle about moped she can get on a normal licence. Has she informed DVLA of her sight loss?

That’s a good point she can only ride a moped. But if she has had more accidents in her car since losing vision, perhaps a call to the doctor to get her to stop driving might be in order.
I don’t think her age is necessarily the primary worry - I wouldn’t want to be a passenger in a car or on a bike if the driver only has 50% vision. Not in a million years.

What's the DVLA policy on motorcycle riders vision requirements? I mean I love the idea of her revisiting her youth but it doesn't sounds awfully safe having a full visual field loss on one side. Could be worth checking online or ringing.

Same as a car.

My DP says you need to have a CBT to ride a scooter (Compulsory Bike Training)
https://riiroo.com/blogs/ride-on-toy-guides/what-motorbike-can-i-ride-on-a-car-licence

Ah thanks.

Might she consider an electric bike instead? They're pretty nifty for getting around on but obviously don't reach the same speeds so much less risky

I'm just thinking that she sounds pretty sharp so will probably be aware of all the risks but doesn't want to accept the age related changes. A sensible and quite fun alternative that acknowledges her need to keep active and independent might be quite well received.

That depends on when she passed her car test. If before February 2001, no need for CBT.