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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Support for HIV partner

76 replies

deb45 · 23/02/2024 12:37

My first post on here and have hesitated too long!
My husband is HIV positive. He caught it about 4 years before we met and it's under control with drugs so that he can't pass it on but it means occasional hospital visits for a check up and to collect medication. He asks me to come along for 'support' as he doesn't like hospitals generally anyway and I do but I find myself dreading it and feeling really low for days before and after and wanting support myself! I've asked him to go alone as he used to before we met but he gets angry and says I'm being selfish and should 'be there' for him which I understand but wish the whole thing didn't make me feel crap. When we met he hid his HIV status from me and I found out by chance which doesn't help my feelings. I can't talk to anyone else as he doesn't understandably want me to tell anyone. Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
deb45 · 28/03/2024 13:35

Thank you for the recent comments and have only just seen them. Many issues in my relationship are difficult hence coming here for support as I don’t have anyone I can talk to but I don’t have the strength or self esteem to walk away. I was going to start a thread about another issue in my relationship but think the HIV aspect will be referred back to! Does anyone on here find it helpful or use it rather than seeking therapy/support elsewhere?

OP posts:
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