Do you chat up men?

[Jamongranary]

Yesterday my bf ( 41 yo man, average looking ) told me that he constantly gets chatted up .
He can't even go shop without women stopping him .

Said it's not his fault , and he had to tell women that he has a gf so that they would leave him alone .

I don't think women approach men much , but i might be wrong ,
so do you guys chat up random middle aged, nothing special looking men outside ? i'm really curious now ( and upset about him bragging about that and felt like he is threatening to cheat on me )

He is adamant it's not friendly chats , it's definitely women wanting him.

I'm so confused as he is 5ft8 , skinny , bald , middle aged man , why would all these women pretty much sexually harass him .

When i ask he just brush me off with "it's not my fault " . Then always accusing me of cheating or talking to men behind his back and insisting i don't wear revealing clothes .

He is a weirdo and i'm done with his mind games .

thanks everyone who replied X

Nah he’s just an emotionally abusive narcissist! Next time he says it just say “ok tell those women they are welcome to you and your small cock, you’re crap in bed anyway”!

Just dump him op! He’s a twat!

@littlebopeepp234 that's what i think. It's actually him harassing women .

I been so upset and couldn't sleep , and he is not worth it .

The way you describe him op and from my own experience I’d say that I’m 99.9% it’s him who is chatting women up. Have you noticed if he follows an array of random women on social media at all ie. Facebook/ Instagram? He absolutely sounds the type.

Does he have an 'approachable persona' (or just a friendly looking face?)
If so, some women may strike up a convo with him because of that. (As you might have a randomn very brief passing conversation with someone in a queue)
It doesn't mean they fancy him, but many men cannot tell the difference between someone just being friendly and thinking they actually fancy him.
He is probably confused. It's a male thing.

Yep. Mine was short bald and definitely punching - even his mates said it.

Ita insecurity jealous and control. I’ve actually spoken to a few of the women he reckoned were all over him and they actually laughed and said it all coming from him

Mine was a cabbie and according to him not a day went by without him being offered sex by passengers.

These men are deluded full of shit game players - not worth wasting any more time.

Doubt it. I’ve come across many of these type. As op has said, he’s jealous and controlling tells her to cover up and he’s also rubbing her nose in his twisted made up story that women fancy him. It’s always these type who have an over inflated ego and think women love them, it’s them who chat the women up and are looking to cheat.

That's rubbish, they may be chatting to him, I chat to builders who come round my house, but I'm not chatting them up, just being friendly.

He might get chatted up once in a blue moon in a bar, but I go to a shop most days and I don't see women chatting up men in this scenario. Smile, possibly, but never ever have I seen anyone pass a number or in any way make a move in broad daylight and without drink!

This is not a typical happening, it's in his imagination, anyway, him accusing you of cheating is the main reason for dumping him as it's horrible and not true and so the fact he's also trying to make you jealous is secondary.

I have had hot boyfriends in the past, and the best they tend to get is glances in the street, and approached out in a nightclub. Women aren't throwing themselves at them in Asda.

No I have never personally but my sister is one who is happy to chat men up she does it all the time if she thinks they are attractive.

Probably deluding himself into believing that every girl who initiates a conversation with him is chatting him up.

He's trying to keep you in line OP. He's manipulating you by putting it in your head that he could jump ship* if you don't meet his expectations. Tedious little men like this might hang this over you to have more sex than you want, or otherwise please them and do what they want, for fear of losing them. Put him in the bin.

*He's lying.

I can't chat up a guy I actually fancy, but I'm very friendly and chatty when I don't fancy the guy.

Not called Matt is he?! I know a 41 year old Matt who genuinely can't see when people are just talking to him and assumes they're all besotted by him!

no , not Matt , seems like loads of men have the same problem though .
🤢

I am nice to everyone and i had a man convinced i fancy him before and refused to believe me when i told him that im just polite and smiley . Delulu

No, I don’t. Oh! And he’s not getting chatted up either.

Men do genuinely think if a woman talks to them they fancy them - if it isn't for work at least. I've never understood women giving flirtatious eye contact either though as it's something I'd avoid at all costs in case they think I'm interested and you get the whole angry "you led me on" rubbish.

I might chat TO a man in the same way I’d chat to a woman, which I suppose could be construed as chatting up.

The claiming that women are all chatting him up thing comes from the same place as accusing you of cheating. Get rid.

Since I like dogs, I always talk to the people attached to their leash, because I want to engage with the dog.
However, I never ever do so with the intention of "chatting the men/women up".
And to be honest, I talk to anyone about anything. It's a family trait - my mum did the same.

Sounds like he knows you could do much better than him so he's trying to make sure you feel jealous and insecure so you won't leave. It's an attempt to make you feel small and chip away at your confidence and self esteem.

As others have said the likelihood is it's him harassing some poor women, probably making them feel really uncomfortable. Women just don't go around "chatting up" random men in the street or bald builders that come to their homes.

These deluded types are everywhere. I was out before Christmas and coming out of the ladies I almost bumped into a bloke who I have mutual friends with. We made a bit of a joke about stopping meeting like this laughed and carried on our separate.

Then I hear from a friend who knows his wife that he’s told her I was coming on to him 🤣🤣 seriously we exchanged 10 words for 30 seconds that I’d forgotten even happened. And I wouldn’t glance at him twice even if he was single.

This was thirty years ago when I was bunking off sixth form and spent some of my mornings in McDonald's (no idea where I got the money for that!), there was a guy that was in there a lot at the same time so we started saying hello, that was all. One day he asked me out, I said no and he went berserk, I'd been "leading him on" apparently, just from "hello". Some men are so deluded.

This man is definitely trying to make you feel insecure and no, he's not being chatted up by multiple women.

There are a lot of men and women who chat it up with random people, regardless of looks and age...all over the world.

He could be telling the truth, could be lying. If you feel these ways, don't feel secure in the relationship and having doubts..just leave.

Also 41 isn't middle-aged...unless he's going to pass at 82.

Lololol

I work in a very male environment.

How they interpret female interaction at times astounds me? Not all,just the cocky idiots.

Hello = she wants me!

Hi John = she wants me bad!

Any converation even weather = she wants me really bad!

I need that report immediately, it's an hour overdue = she has it bad, can feel the sexual tension? (There's tension alright but it isn't sexual)