I think this is the final straw

[ratbunny]

It's a long story, fraught with winter vomiting, food allergies and a trip to barcelona. But today, after all of this and being ready and packed to leave tomorrow morning, dh rings up and says things are so bad at work that he can't go away with us.
Since moving away from my hometown 6 years ago, I have always felt that dh's work is the be all and end all for him. It is an industry full of single men, so there is no fmaily friendlyness, as I have found out since having ds.
He works long hours and frequently out of hours too. He is constantly in a bad mood because of work stress.
i have tried being supportive, and making his home life secure and supportive, and not complaining when he has to work outside of normal hours. but that just seems to encourage him to work more, rather than getting him to spend time with the family.
so now I am fed up of it. always missing ds's bedtime, having to cancel plans becasue he has to work. and now having to cancel a holiday that has been booked since october.
I really am not willing to do it anymore. I would rather bring up ds alone than be constant second fiddle to dh's job.

I don't expect anyone to reply really, I just need to vent.
and

well, after taking ds to the doctors, he puked everywhere again. and he has had more diarrhoea. I don't want to deal with that on my own in barcelona. It was looking like I would go alone then, had my bags ready, a lift to the airport sorted and everything. But I won't do it with ds like that - that is way too much stress for the first time.
I have however, booked about a week away round a couple of friends, one ds stops puking. So that'll be a break, and maybe dh will realsie that he misses us.
i have also given him 4 months to sort out his job - looking elsewhere or changing industry. he realises that his company is taking the piss too.
he did suggest I make a speech at their christmas do. Now THAT would be good....

well it seems like your ds being ill has solved the immediate dilema and it would seem like your dh does want the situation to be different which is good too. Hope your ds is much better very soon.

saved by sick

I am past feeling and now, and have degenerated into mania...

Hey, ratty, sorry to hear you're going to miss your holiday. Hope ds gets better quickly. Then I hope you have a bloody fantastic week away and your dh is thoroughly miserable without you! x

well I feel I had to update this really, just to get things off my chest.
I havent stopped crying all day.
I am SO angry and upset about this, and I know that I could have gone alone, but I didnt want to go alone with ds not being 100%. And even if we did have to cancel because of ds being ill, at least that would be a decision I had taken part in. but. I am sure he would have been ok for the holiday with both of us there for him but not just me.
So now I am stuck here, my friends are away / at work / too far, it is raining, it is cold and worse of all is isn't fucking barcelona.
And I really want to make someone pay. I am so close to smashing things up, but wont obv cos of ds being about. I am so upset, and SO ANGRY!!!!
we are rebooking the holiday (well, I am, along with a holiday with some friends for just me), and i am going away tomorrow night, but this isn't making me feel any better!

Sorry your feeling so I can really understand why you feel like that though perhaps you need to talk again to your dh and explain in depth just how badly this incident is affecting you (and ultimately your relationship with him)