No coming back from this is there?

[Mirrorimagemenopause]

Told my partner last week, I had been to the doctors about a mole that has recently developed and told him I was being referred to a skin specialist. Partner, after acknowledging it did look concerning then proceeded to get on his knees and put his hands together in the praying position to thank God & asking God to answer his prayer to rid him of me. We have not been getting on as I have been running out of tolerance that he struggles to remain in continuous work & due to ill health has not been able to work much during 2023. I literally pay for everything, the mortgage, bills & food. He is useless at managing his money & Cleary has no appreciation to the hand that feeds & keeps him. I can’t afford to separate as he won’t leave the house & if I left & sold house he would get up to 50% & I wouldn’t be able to buy another house with my share. We have twin girls aged 9. I feel like I’m stuck with him until they are older.

OMG He's literally wished you dead to your face
You need to find a way to leave otherwise he will drag you down so low, you can't see a way out
There will be a way to leave, I promise
Your DD's
When your tests are done, please see a solicitor Knowledge is power, and as you're already paying for everything, you'll manage better than you think
He has literally bitten the hand that feeds him.
I do hope your tests bring good news
Seek support from friends, family who you know have your back

Oops Your DD's will thrive without him

This. Even if he actually thinks this, to do this in front of you is absolutely chilling. I am so sorry op. You deserve so much better than this awful awful person

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Both the worrying health concern and the having a shitty partner.

I would not stay with this person. Total douche bag reaction to a legitimate health concern.

I expect the mole will turn out to be nothing to worry about but your partner on the other hand... Get rid of both I say!

Good god OP this is awful! Get the hell out of there whichever way you can! He sounds unhinged and who knows what lengths he would go to.

This.

Get rid of him now, even if he takes 50% of the assets, if he's not working you're already paying more than your fair share of the household costs. Get shot of him and see if you can buy him out. Remember it's 50% of the equity and he'd have to pay you maintenance or you may qualify for top up benefits without him there.

I can't believe what I just read. This is mad! Please do not stay with this vile man. He is not just cruel but there is something deeply wrong with him. I hope you find somewhere to go with your daughters and that friends and family can help support you.

Please leave him. Yes the financial pain will be real but for fucks sake you cannot continue to live with that monster.

You need to be rid of him. Jeez what an arsehole he is.

Oh OP ❤I left a DV relationship with my son and just the clothes on our backs. 1 year or so later we have a cosy small house. The relief of not having X partner in our lives daily is wonderful and so peaceful. You only have one life! Leave with your twins and you will all thrive! I had no family or friends to help us and still managed to break free.

So you can get two flats. Run.

Absolutely this😁

You can use the mortgage charter to change mortgage to interest only now and then he won't get any more equity in the split- put that savings into your own savings account instead

Literally the most unpleasant thing I've heard someone say to another human being. He is so vile I couldn't stand to be around him another minute.

For God's sake go see a solicitor and protect your children from him. You are likely to get more than 50% if you are the prime carer for the children, and it sounds like he's bringing nothing to the relationship.

As a pp said, Don't put another 10 years money into this relationship for him. Get out now.

50% of the assets is better than a life with this asshole.

You deserve better. Your twins deserve better.

Please leave him. Renting is still better than living with him.

You’re not married.
So all you will have to split is any joint asset such as the house.

Then you’re free.
If your dcs spend more time with you, you may get a bigger percentage than 50%.

Far better to rent and be away from him than to stay just so you can hold on to assets.

What an absolutely dreadful thing. I’m so sorry, OP, you didn’t deserve that. Lots of good advice already on this thread. Good luck getting rid of him and wishing you all the best with your health 💐

He's supposed to love and protect you.

I feel really really sad that the person who is supposed to love and protect you the most in all the world has been praying for you to die.

Yes, thats about one of the saddest things I've read on here.

I hope your mole turns out to be ok.

That is so awful. I am so sorry. Please dont let yourself feel stuck. Find a solicitor and speak to Womens Aid. Being around someone like this will be chipping away at you, so I am going to hope (I dont pray) that not only will you be fine, but also away from this arsehole.

I can't believe what I just read. You are worried about cancer and he is praying for you to die? Go and see a solicitor. Get the house up for sale and leave him. You might have to rent but better to be in a rented house than in your own home with your partner praying for you to die. I'd leave him and not look back. It might be tight for you but you have a job. He doesn't so it will be tighter for him. Don't carry on living with him it will eat away at your self esteem and what type of role model is all this giving to DC? You know you'd be better off without him don't you? There is no coming back from what he did.

This is the worst thing I've ever heard. No, there is no coming back from this.

Put the house on the market. You're not married so no divorce, but as others have said see a solicitor about how to manage the sale.

It won't take long once you've shed yourself of this parasite to see the financial benefits, even if you have to move from a house to a flat.

You will feel AMAZING once you are clear of him, I promise you.

Serve him with divorce proceedings then get on your hands and knees and pray to god you rid him from your life forever.

You must leave him, for your own well-being and that of your daughters. You can use the 50% from the property as a deposit for a new place and start afresh. You deserve much more.

Go to an estate agent tomorrow and get the place put up for sale. He can't argue with that as he can't pay the mortgage. He's absolutely disgusting. You gave birth to his children and he says that to you? He's a cocklodger.

Even if you have to rent for a couple of years, that will be fine just to get rid of him.