I wonder if I'll ever like my DH again

[coucoululu]

I can't stand my husband. We have no spark. I have no interest in kissing him or making love other than because of a natural urge. I feel like he's a bumbling buffoon.

I've made threads in the past where people have asked if I'm a troll because the stuff he does is so stupid. Today he said he thought donor kebab was healthy. He went to Oxford and yet comes out with the dumbest stuff. I feel like I'll get flak for being rude but I tried to put it all diplomatically and I'm so fed up of him.

When we were dating he was a total arsehole to me eg. Called me fat, hairy etc. When I wanted to break up he admitted he watched youtube videos on how to flirt. Since then he's been the kindest person ever.

Sometimes I feel like I've married a child..

I'm sorry MN. I'm going to use this thread to document all the irritating stuff he does and I welcome comments.. and maybe it will reveal to me whether I'm a total bitch and hate him for no good reason or if everyone agrees DH is infuriating and an overgrown child.

HONESTLY, why are men so fucking dumb sometimes. And how the fuck is it that they're the ones in power in this world. You wouldn't believe I was once one of those women who would never ever complain about their husband. I can't believe what I've become sometimes

I think you should document how you're going to leave him.
You don't seem compatible. You know that though?

I don't understand why people stay married to people they have such contempt and hatred for. I would rather be single.

A chicken Doner is actually pretty healthy as takeout goes. Probably not the point tho. Why not just get divorced?

Not fair or healthy to either of you to stay in a make believe relationship. Just go your separate ways and you may find someone more compatible. There are a few good men around still... good luck

So when you were dating he was an arsehole to you and called you fat and hairy - yet you stayed with him and married him! Why?

I think I do want a divorce. We're currently on holiday but return tomorrow. Will need to have a chat tomorrow evening.

I have no idea where to start with it all. I don't want anything from him so presumably lawyers are not needed?

Dumbest thing I've ever done. I don't know why.

He said all of that to you and you feel this way about him. Yet you married him and stay married, what does that make you? Why not divorce or is it easier to keep the marriage and whatever benefits that brings?

Sorry, that came across very judgy, it wasn't meant to! It does sound like you'd be happier without him, good luck OP & hope it works out for you 💐

A FOOL. It makes me a FOOL.

God I don't know why it's taken me this long to realise

Leave him then or is his salary still attractive enough?

Quoted wrong post.

Maybe he's bored too, join some clubs together, get a cinema pass, do stuff together, date night, it might help and give you proper stuff to talk about. X

You can be intelligent but have little common sense and still be a total idiot.

To be honest I wonder why men rule the world too, women are so much more equipped to do it better as well, so I have no idea how women have all these talent's (multitasking efficiently, keeping everyone else on track, wearing 4-5 hats daily, clever, intuitive, sensitive) but some how physical strength overpowers them all in so many aspects. Just can’t get my head around it to be honest.

It's nothing to do with his salary. How sexist!

One of the reasons I left my abusive ex is that I was starting to complain about him to other people and not even he deserved to have to live with someone who did that.

You expresss yourself horribly about that man, who doesn't seem that bad, just that you are not suited.

Perhaps. But it's a fair thought since he was an asshat even before you married him - by your own description.

You don’t need to justify anything. Just finish with him?

HONESTLY, why are men so fucking dumb sometimes. And how the fuck is it that they're the ones in power in this world. You wouldn't believe I was once one of those women who would never ever complain about their husband. I can't believe what I've become sometimes

Because women like you put up with and encourage (by marrying) such men despite them calling you fat and hairy when only dating.

Honestly can't see how you could ever be a person that wouldn't have complained about him when he's been such a nasty dick.

You've not become anything, you seem to have accepted it all from the start.

I think you need to reconcile yourself with the sunken costs fallacy. You recognise he's an arse. But you are reluctant to leave because of all the years you've committed. Let them go. There are so many years to come. Alone is better than encumbered . But that message isn't taught to young girls and doesn't apply to men so it's not often heard nor understood

Leave op.

"Why are men so fucking dumb?"

Pot calling the kettle black!

He showed you what a twat he was when you were dating, and yet you married him anyway. Who marries someone who calls them fat and hairy?

You could stop being dumb now by divorcing him.

Totally here for this.

Let it aaaaaaall out, OP.