DP called me a dickhead because I woke him up

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I never stay up for NYE and DP always does. Last night it was the other way round, DP was really tired and cranky so went to bed. He asked me not to wake him up.

I went to bed just after 12, was careful to be quiet. I cuddled into him which woke him up and he got angry and called me a dickhead.

I’ve just spoken to him (he’s at work) and said I feel he owes me an apology. He is still in a foul mood and has grudgingly apologised but says I am always the victim and I should apologise for waking him up.

He had to go to work and said not to wake him? Why go to bed quietly but then cuddle him which will normally wake someone up? Why didn’t you just go to sleep?

Calling you a dickhead is not on, awful word.

However he did ask you not to wake him and you did. Most people get annoyed when woken.

I think you should apologise too. I'd be really annoyed if my DH deliberately woke me up when I asked him not to and had work the next day.

I didn’t deliberately wake him up, we usually cuddle at night

He needs to apologise for the abusive language. It’s not ok. An angry “FFS” would have done the trick instead.

But he asked you not to wake him and you did. Why did you cuddle into him, knowing that would wake him? That was thoughtless. You do need to apologise for that.

You probably cuddle at night when you’re both in bed at the same time I imagine. You woke him.

DH and I have had words about this in the past but the other way round 'I was only cuddling you'. Sure, but touching me when I'm asleep is guaranteed to wake me up, so simply DON'T DO IT when I've asked you not to.

Calling names isn't very nice but what possessed you to creep stealthily to bed and then ruin it by cuddling up to him which was likely to wake him?

I can see why he’s annoyed, sorry OP.
If I need to be on form for work the next day (and working New Year’s Day at that…) I’d be a little annoyed if someone woke me up when I specifically asked them not to.

Ok ok, I guess I’ll call him and apologise. Appreciate the replies 💐

My dh woke me at 4 the other morning by cuddling me. I absolutely called him an arsehole. It's selfish.

I think he's being OTT OP- I regularly wake my DH up in the night and vice versa if either of us have poor sleep. But we have never called each other names- that's terrible behaviour on his part. Work or no work, you deserve better than to be treated like that.

You woke him up as your body temperature would have possibly been cold.

Well done OP.

But he does need to apologise for the abusive language and you need to have a chat about why that’s not ok and can’t happen again.

We're all different. For F**s Sake would be much worse than dickhead in my eyes!

You both need to apologise.

Sleep deprivation is ruining my life.. And actually can reduce your lifespan... Yabu.

Another one agreeing you shouldn't have cuddled up but he definitely shouldn't have called you a dickhead!

Is everything else okay with your marriage?

*DP was really tired and cranky so went to bed. He asked me not to wake him up.

I went to bed just after 12, was careful to be quiet. I cuddled into him which woke him up and he got angry and called me a dickhead.*

Fair enough. Next time let him sleep and cuddle when you're both awake.

When dh does this to me, I can't tell you how livid it makes me. Cuddles wake someone up and if they need to get up early and need their sleep, then it's really out of order.

Cuddling up to him when he was asleep and has to work today was a dick move.
He was quite accurate in his assessment.

He asked you not to wake him up.
You deliberately did.

Cuddling whilst both awake or falling asleep together is fine.
Waking someone from a deep sleep because of your own clingyness and need cuddle is not on.

Nice one

Absolutely shouldn’t have cuddled into him. I was really annoyed last night as dh and dd both sent me texts saying happy new year at 12 despite me telling them I was going to bed to sleep at 10.30! So I thought I didn’t need to mute the notifications as they knew I’d be asleep but no…. 😞

I would gouge someone’s eye out if they tried to cuddle me when I was asleep