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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

OH tripped me up and laughed

84 replies

SaltedCaramelLife · 22/12/2023 18:43

Would like some perspective.

My OH was walking behind me, intentionally tripped me over and laughed. I moved away, to walk across and some distance from him. He continued laughing and asked what was the matter with me. I said I was walking away so I didn’t make a fool of myself.
We were in a public place and he tripped me around the side of a building where no one else happened to be walking.

There’s obviously a backstory and I won’t drip feed, but I would appreciate your thoughts. Is this what your partners are doing for a laugh? Is this how adults are behaving now? Until today, I’d have been fairly confident he wouldn’t reply “I thought you’d find it funny” if I asked why he did that.

OP posts:
Prelapsarianhag · 22/12/2023 20:42

Mate. No, no no. This shit is not just dangerous but the disrespect can be seen from outer space.

Mrsttcno1 · 22/12/2023 21:16

Did he actually try to trip you up, or did he do that thing where you sort of kick the back/inside of shoe while walking so you just sort of do a little hop skip jump?

Topseyt123 · 22/12/2023 21:24

Neither normal nor remotely acceptable.

You need to dump this arsehole. He could injure you badly soon, all in the name of fun.

Not remotely funny.

FantasyFox · 22/12/2023 21:33

Mrsttcno1 · 22/12/2023 21:16

Did he actually try to trip you up, or did he do that thing where you sort of kick the back/inside of shoe while walking so you just sort of do a little hop skip jump?

That's still an absolute arsehole thing to do. As a PP said it can lead to major injury.

Notsurehwhattdo · 22/12/2023 21:37

Like most people, I would imagine, I have never tried to trip up my wife of ten years for a laugh or for any reason whatsoever. It's not funny and is abnormal, disrespectful behaviour.

AtrociousCircumstance · 22/12/2023 21:38

@RomeoOscarXrayXray So your H is allowed to trip your kids up but not you. Children do not have the power in a family dynamic. Tripping them up is not ok even if they have been socialised to be acquiescent of it. They have had no choice.

Stop your H tripping up your kids who have no choice but to laugh along.

Janieforever · 22/12/2023 21:40

I find it really sad you don’t know the answer to this. I know no one who would do this. Is the back story domestic abuse?

rainbowsparkle28 · 22/12/2023 21:42

Leave. This is abusive and would be not acceptable to anybody let alone to someone where you are supposed to be their partner. Like WTAF?!

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 22/12/2023 21:43

No it's awful. Not funny at all unless perhaps you have the kind of relationship where you both enjoy prankimg or April fools jokes but even then, this is dangerous, you could have twisted an ankle or broken your nose.

Whats the back story ?

Janieforever · 22/12/2023 21:43

RomeoOscarXrayXray · 22/12/2023 18:50

We (my 2 DC and I) do this to my DH (their Dad) and each other. No one is allowed to do it to me because I've got a bad back and hips. We pick the right time and place and it's all done in fun. Not malice. It's in good humour for us. Doesn't sound like that's the case for you.

i don’t even know what I’m reading here.

thistimelastweek · 22/12/2023 21:43

Does he also think it funny to whip away your chair just as you're sitting down?

RoseInBloome7 · 22/12/2023 21:45

Just awful , controlling behaviour .

Leave.

And the back story ...?

TheGhostOfTheOpera · 22/12/2023 21:51

Nope, not ok.
And clearly part if a pattern too.

TheWalkingDeadly · 22/12/2023 21:52

My dd is being kicked in the heels by 2 boys (shes 11) its hapoened 4 times at secondary since sept and the last time tripped her up. They are 6ft tall she says so almost a foot taller. I call it bullying. And its certainly not funny. They are targetting her as she is alone.
Personally think any parent encouraging this is crazy.
And if i saw people doing this immediately think they arent that clever.
If over 10 they are criminally responsible and could maybe be sued if injure someone

TheGhostOfTheOpera · 22/12/2023 21:55

WorriedMum231 · 22/12/2023 19:06

Well hopefully she’s taught them boundaries as well. Which it sounds like she has as they don’t do it to her. They obviously no what the word no means.

Show quote history

Except you first need to say NO and you won’t be able to do it before it happens - because who would think they have to preempt something as stupid as ‘I find it funny to make you fall over’ hahaha??

TheGhostOfTheOpera · 22/12/2023 21:58

“I thought you’d find it funny”

Yay right …
Because I’m sure he’d find it funny if you tripped him, proceeded to laugh at him (not with him) whilst he clearly had made a fool of himself in front of people.

MiddleagedBeachbum · 22/12/2023 21:58

No this ain’t normal, or nice.

im sorry he’s a bully to you xx

randomusername2020 · 22/12/2023 22:01

This reply has been withdrawn

Removed at poster's request due to privacy concerns.

Livinghappy · 22/12/2023 22:02

@RomeoOscarXrayXray - it's not big or clever to do this..really hope your dc don't copy the behaviour when they are at school or later in life.

WorriedMum231 · 22/12/2023 22:02

TheGhostOfTheOpera · 22/12/2023 21:55

Except you first need to say NO and you won’t be able to do it before it happens - because who would think they have to preempt something as stupid as ‘I find it funny to make you fall over’ hahaha??

Show quote history

You learn about each other and gage a sense of humour. Have you been in a relationship or friendship before? You must have an idea of what your friends and partner would enjoy.

Boopeedoop · 22/12/2023 22:03

It's not funny it's spiteful,.nasty bullying. And when you tell him you don't find it funny, I'll bet he tells.you to lighten up, he was only having a laugh and will put the blame on you?

I've been married to my husband For 25 years,.he's never once done something spiteful in the name of "fun". He loves and respects me and would hate for me to be upset.

FictionalCharacter · 22/12/2023 22:04

No of course it isn’t normal or ok. He’s bullying you.

Idontknow010101 · 22/12/2023 22:05

Thats mean and nasty behaviour. I really hope that you know you deserve better than this

grumpycow1 · 22/12/2023 22:05

No way. If anyone did that sort of thing to me they wouldn’t be in my life anymore.

abusive arsehole.

sheselectric24 · 22/12/2023 22:08

It sounds dramatic and I'm not usually one to be worried about risk but my work colleague died from tripping over. She tripped over an uneven pavement and hit her head on a stone. The fall seemed like nothing just a small thing. She laughed it off embarrassed and there was no blood or anything. She went home as normal and died later that day. Cause of death was brain bleed or something. So sad. She was only young.
It seems very unlikely but you just never know when things can go seriously wrong.