All cos I don't want to know about his ex

[Bunn23]

Partner has started to tell me something about his ex's boyfriend, I stopped him and said I don't want to know.
He said that I'm out of order, I talk about my life and my family and in future to not talk about my family and he won't talk about his.
I said that I dont want to know about his ex . Lots happened but one example , she seen us, cried and he spent ages apologising to his adult children and her for walking down the street with me and saying how wrong he was for doing this. We had been together 2 years at this point and they had been split up longer.
At times her feelings, came before mine and so I don't want to know about her life, I'm sure she doesn't want me to know.
He's ended up going to his daughters house and said that I'm out of order, should give him list of stuff can talk about and not really took in what I've said about my feelings.
I just feel dismissed, he's said it wasn't about his ex but about her boyfriend....same thing.
Doubting self now and thinking am I being arsey .

How long have you wasted with him?

He's not a keeper, is he? I personally wouldn't want to be with a man who is so involved with his ex and her new relationship, but even without that, tantrums and storming out are too teenage for me.

He apologised to his ex for walking down the street with you? Fuck that I’d have been gone at that point.

Talking about family is normal but his ex wife’s new partner isn’t family. Hrs being an absolute dick.

I think you've been immature tbh. We're you the OW by any chance?

Eh ? What kind of an answer is that ?!
Why would her partner’s ex’s new partner be of any interest to her ? I am not the slightest bit interested in my ex’s latest wife and pretty sure my DH is even less interested !

He clearly isn't ready to be in a relationship. You should run for the hills.

Can you give us more information about what he was saying? I’m not particularly interested in hearing about dp’s ex or her new partner but if it related to his kids then maybe he’d want to talk about it. If it was just idle gossip about nothing or bitching then I’d agree with you.

I'm not saying the new partner is of interest to OP, but her reaction seems OTT to me. The man has kids with his ex wife, so her new fella is of interest TO HIM because it affects his kids.

OP just saying "I don't want to know" is a bit rich I thjnk.

The kids are adults . He talks about going to his daughter’s house which suggests someone older than a teenager .

His kids are both in their 30s.
They were separated before I came along for a few years .
It was gossip that he wanted to tell me, he's since text me even after I said its nothing to do with me.

He clearly has issues and his exs boyfriend isn't part of his family and you are right to say you don't want to know if he has prioritised his exs feelings over yours from the start.
I would finish it with him, he's acting like a plonker.

So previously he have two women vying for his attention, his ex and you, and throw in the children aswell. Oh how everybody loves and wants Bunn23's partner.

How long has this boyfriend been on the scene with his ex, do you think he could be jealous of him.

Some men are like that, they dump their wives but don't really want them to move on.

I think you are seeing that in his character, his gossiping about this man is his ego being dented.

Wait so after TWO years of you being together his ex and children didn’t know you existed? And she was upset that she found out by seeing you? I think this is the main issue here that he’s kept you a secret. Not only that but the fact she cried shows that she’s not over him in some capacity.

I’m really not about talking about exes I find it gross and disrespectful. Fair enough if they have to be mentioned but I nipped it in the bud with my boyfriend as he constantly brought up his ex when we first started dating.

He sounds like Jason on selling sunset. All exs must be friends!

He is a drama king, craving for gossip and be right all the times. I think is more than fair not to want to know about other people little things. Unless he was going to tell you he won the lottery of that he is being awarded with a Nobel prize I would be doing the same as you.
He putting in the same level direct family with partners of exes speak very loud about who he is.

He's got a bad case of Mentionitis hasn't he?

Sorry but it sounds like he's not actually over her if she's still on his mind this much and he's having a strop because he can't talk about her and her life.

His kids and ex knew about me from the start, his kids met me etc.
But after 2 years of being together, we were walking down the street, his ex seen us and rang his kids upset. We weren't even holding hands. He spent the day saying how sorry he was that she was upset to his kids who were saying mum upset and to her. It felt like I was the other woman , a secret though.
I was wondering if he had feelings for her or was jealous that she'd moved on.

I'd still be interested. She and whoever shes with would be a part of my kids life, however old they were.

He's still at his daughters , looks like spending the night there.

Why are you tolerating all this?

Pack up his stuff and send it to his daughters in a cab.

He sounds pathetic.

Listen being alone is far better than this.

Thank you all for listening.
He's said it's the way I spoke to him( asked him to stop there as I don't want to talk about her), I've made him homeless- didn't ask him to leave, just to not discuss ex, basically twisting things, he chose to go to his daughters.
I'm not perfect by any means but feels like thrown his toys out of pram, asking for all of his stuff back ASAP .
I've said OK, come get it( cant believe because ive said i dont want to discuss his ex he's his stuff back)
Now suddenly it's too late to get his stuff.

Honestly he sounds like a 12 year old who’s been told he can’t use his Xbox.

Pathetic behaviour from a grown man because he couldn’t gossip.

Let him crack on at his daughters. I’m sure he’ll be back - if you want him

So he's ended it but said it's your fault.

Sounds about right.

They've been together a long time by the sounds of it and his ex knows him well, she's probably been trying to ruin his mental health by proxy, by way of his daughters.

Daughters can have a huge hold on their fathers, especially if they've been in a long term family unit, it does sound like you're better off out of it, he was a spineless individual slagging his wife off to get with you and then blaming you when he didn't get his own way of being in both of your lives.

Let him go, he's just a weak man.