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Relationships

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to thoses with amazing dh/dps please tell me what they do with regard to housework?

89 replies

mrsdannydyer · 11/03/2008 12:59

tia

OP posts:
WowOoo · 11/03/2008 13:16

Mine is meant to do heavy duty jobs, bins and help out when he has time with cooking, cleaning or whatever. BUT, actually hasn't done much at all recently. He works full time, me pt. I dream of having a cleaner or and extra pair of hands..

PuppyMonkey · 11/03/2008 13:17

dp will do most stuff - he's much better at houswork than me. Better at cooking too.

I do most at home at the mo cos I am only working part time now. But when I was full time, I reckon he did more than me. And I don't have to "tell him" either - he will do it of his own free will!!

He's a maniac for DIY - can be a bit too enthusiastic, iykwim...

Won't iron though... that's always "my job."

mumblechum · 11/03/2008 13:17

Why's everyone so obsessed with what housework their dh/dp does?

Do you think they talk amongst themselves about how nicely their dw/dps iron the pillowcases?

Surely we should value our husbands for more important things, eg companionship, sense of humour, earning megabucks , good shagging ability, good fatherhood ability?

Or is it just me???

SheWillBeLoved · 11/03/2008 13:19

He is a lazy sod, but when asked/forced he'll put washes on and dry them - just hasn't mastered folding and putting away . If I cook, he does the dishes - but hasn't figured out that pots and pans are also dishes. He'll put the bins out. If he lived alone, I wouldn't go into the house without Kim and Aggie by my side, and possibly some protective clothing

cmotdibbler · 11/03/2008 13:20

We both work ft, and he does his equal share of everything but actually putting washing away - will put it in washing machine/dryer and take it out, but it never goes into drawers.
He does all the cooking and dealing with insurance and builders/plumbers, and usually is the one that does the cats litter tray and puts the bins out.

If the cleaner hasn't done his shirts for the week, he does all his own ironing.

We both do general cleaning, dishwasher, Ds feeding/cleaning/dressing/delivering to nursery, nappy washing etc etc.

Buda · 11/03/2008 13:21

It's just you mumblechum!

Mine also pays for cleaner!

He also cooks at weekends and if we have people over. Will do supermarket shop. Will hang washing out if he notices it in machine. If I am away he will do any washing needed. He can iron if need be.

Bink · 11/03/2008 13:23

Depends on your perspective, mumblechum - but to me "companionship" requires sharing the grind - or at the very least recognising that there is a grind that somebody has to do, and so if you're not actually able to take your part in it you do whatever you can do to lighten the load. Eg, like anna's partner, paying for services.

So attitude to housework (which is the grind we all face) is fundamental. Boring, granted, but fundamental. I think.

Joolyjoolyjoo · 11/03/2008 13:24

DH is great when he is home, probably to make up for the fact that he away so much (in the Navy)
He will get up with the kids when he isn't at work, and make them breakfast, but won't pick out clothes for them!
He helps with the tidying/ kitchen/ hoovering every night after dinner
He does the girls bath, which gives me a break.
He often walks the dogs if he is off, especially if the weather is rotten
He washes his own gear on the boat, and does all his own ironing (and mine, should the need arise!)
He loads the dishwasher (incorrectly!) and washes the pots (using on average half a bottle of fairy liquid each time!)
He washes the cars (the point of which escapes me!) and does the grass etc
He is, however, incapable of putting anything where it is meant to be and sheds clothes and possessions like the dogs shed hair!

The hoover story reminded me of a friend's dad who came home from the pub late, puked in the hall, then hoovered it up before staggering off to bed!!!!! As you can imagine, he was in the doghouse for quite some time!! My DH has never done anything as bad as that, although he does try to hoover up yoghurt.

Tommy · 11/03/2008 13:25

agree with oliveoil they are not amazing - they just live in the house too....

mine does dishwasher and clears up kitchen after dinner (which I cook)
hoovers and cleans bathroom (on Sunday morning while I take DSs to church)
will put washing on, iron and put away (athough I usually iron as I'm quicker)
will do supermarket shopping

and the "man" jobs like putting rubbish out and changing lightbulbs (doesnt need a ladder!)

mumblechum · 11/03/2008 13:26

Maybe it's because we only have one child, and he's 13 now, but I just don't see it as a grind. I'm home at 3pm, dh is home at 7pm, fair enough I'll have a bit of a tidy, make dinner & light the woodburner, but that still leaves me 2 hours to read the paper/watch the news/whatever, while he's coming home shattered after a 12 hour day.

PuppyMonkey · 11/03/2008 13:27

Mumblechum, I don't think anybody did say it was the most important thing about their relationship. Course it isn't! No harm in discussing it though, it's quite an interesting snapshot of modern life this...

suzywong · 11/03/2008 13:28

his own washing if he has time and the bathroom ; - always cleans the bathroom, and kids' breakfasts some of the week

second the happy to do what asked thing, but needs to be asked

magnolia74 · 11/03/2008 13:28

He gets up at 6.30-7am every Saturday and goes food shopping, comes home puts it away and then does breakfast. Usually takes baby with him so I get a lie in

He cooks dinner roughly every other night.
He cooks breakfast every weekend.
He cleans toilets.
He cleans kitchen floor.
Once a month he will blitz and bleach kitchen.
He washes the car.
He does all the gardening.
He does all the DIY apart from painting.
He baths the kids more than me!

He would hoover but I prefer to do it myself thats the same for the puting clothes away too

francagoestohollywood · 11/03/2008 13:32

dh does the kitchen every night (I cook)
walks the dc to nursery 2 days a week
drives
makes the beds if he's working at home
makes risotto
quite good at fixing stuff

francagoestohollywood · 11/03/2008 13:32

Yes, agree, these are not amazing things, it's just "living together", I suppose.

suzywong · 11/03/2008 13:34

Not getting at you, but I don't consider bathing kids housework, does anyone else?

purpleturtle · 11/03/2008 13:34

Dh does loads of stuff - usually loads the washing machine as we go to bed; sets the coffee machine for the morning; sets up for breakfast; often makes tea - bread & butter type (because I can't be arsed am doing something else); will iron; takes bins out; will deal with dishwasher or washing machine as required; hoovers; the only thing he doesn't ever do is clean the bathroom. Or dust.

blousy · 11/03/2008 13:35

All DIY and gardening, dcs pcked lunches and all the cooking (also plans meals and writes shopping list for me). Any cleaning that needs doing. Dishwasher filling and emptying. Does washing and ironing about once a week, although the other day he ironed an entire basket of dirty clothes .
Feel a bit guilty now, as he works long hours too. Serve him right for marrying a lazy woman!

Fennel · 11/03/2008 13:38

Mine does half the childcare, his own laundry, plus he washed and changed all the nappies, for 3 in washables.

He does less than half the cooking but that's because I quite like my own cooking.

He officially does half the cleaning and clearing up but he's fairly crap at it so in practice I do more than half and grumble at him a lot about that.

He does all the plumbing/rewiring/electricity/building work/computer maintenance/car maintenance because he happens to be very good at all of those.

He hoovers rooms with a carpet, I mop and sweep rooms without.

dejags · 11/03/2008 13:39

DH does pretty much anything that needs to be done, so he:

Cooks (most nights he cooks for us and I cook for the children)
Cleans(including packing dishwasher, washing dishes, mopping the floors, general tidying, springcleaning when necessary)
Schoolrun (if needed and at short notice)
Childcare - if the nanny is sick or one of the children is sick, he will do this if I can't

We pretty much share all the chores. Excepting bills/banking as I do this and DH does DIY.

Anna8888 · 11/03/2008 13:40

suzywong - bathing children is part of childcare, not housework.

wilbur · 11/03/2008 13:41

Dh doesn't do any real housework (I am rofl at the thought of him remembering to clean a bathroom) but he does do washing up without being asked, even if it not every night, he will help with laundry when he remembers - he used to do more of this when the washing machine was where he could see it every day. He also does lawn mowing, bins out etc, diy boys tasks (although I do these too) But what he does do is cook. And this for me is wonderful as I am not a very good or keen cook. We are just getting to the point where he will do a batch cook of something at the weekend for us and the kids in the week, as well as cooking about 3 nights a week for the two of us, and usually doing Sunday lunch. And if we have people over, he is almost always the main cook and I just do pudding, which I am good at.

francagoestohollywood · 11/03/2008 13:43

well, bathing the kids ... I suppose that if they are dirty enough to get the furniture dirty then it can be classified as housework...

Oliveoil · 11/03/2008 13:45

great cartoon here from Jacky Fleming, one named 'rubbish'. That is dh emptying the bin...

Oliveoil · 11/03/2008 13:46

oh arse, it has not worked

page 8 under postcards

worth looking at them all anyway, v funny