Mums new partner took a discrete photo of me

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I met my Mum today for lunch and her new partner, I have seen him briefly before so this was the first proper time meeting him. We all had a nice lunch together in a restaurant, after about an hour he said he’d like a photo of me and my Mum together, I said sorry but I didn’t want my photo taken, as I was also eating and found it a strange request, as we had not long met, anyway he had his phone in his hand and I saw he changed the angle and I could see he took a discreet photo of me, my Mum was next to him but I don’t think she saw, as she was eating still.
I didn’t say anything and carried on like normal, shall I contact my Mum and tell her what I saw and ask her to tell him to delete it?
It’s made me feel quite uneasy especially as I told him I didn’t want a photo taken.

Tell your mum he did this and also contact him and tell him you want him to delete the photo. If he's a decent person, he will. If he doesn't, you know what sort of person he is.

I don’t have his contact number, it’s the first proper time I’ve met him. I want to tell my Mum but I’m worried she’ll think I’m being over the top.

How is it over the top to be annoyed that a man you said no to still went ahead and took your picture anyway, he has no right.
Tell your mother.

Tell your mum.

Tell her.

Inform your mother.

How long has this man and your mother been together?.

You said no and he went ahead anyway and took you photo surreptitiously.

If he can ignore your boundaries this readily it is likely he can ignore any boundary your mother cares to set.

If he's a decent person he wouldn't have taken it after you said no. Tell her.

It will look strange that you didn't immediately call him out but you could just say to your mum that you were incredulous that he did it after you said no and now you've thought about it you are annoyed.

Do make sure you're certain it was of you and not your meal!

It’d be worrying that he took your photo surreptitiously but the fact you had made clear you didn’t want it makes this even more worrying. Tell your mum. This isn’t a man to be trusted. He thinks what women say and want doesn’t count - not when he wants something different.

My friend is married to an arsehole. She's now divorcing him, controlling wanker. It took her, and her other friends, a while to understand that. She asked me how I always knew, years before. And it was that he would take photos without permission and against boundaries. It's a bad sign and noticing the pink flags saves you a lot of red ones later.

Tell Mum she needs to look through his phone for other pics of her (in bed?) and other women. There may be some that are extreme.

Have a quiet word with her, tell her not to move him in too quickly, if or when he turns out to be a controlling twat he's easier to get rid of.

How do you know he definitely took a photo of you?

My mum would do something similar, so I don’t doubt it but you need to be 100% sure because if he denies it and shows your mum his phone and he hadn’t taken the photo then you’re going to look a bit unhinged.

I'd have told him there and then to delete it .

I am almost certain he did, the way he angled his phone and used his finger on the screen to take the screen shot. I have messaged my Mum and asked her to ask him, she hasn’t responded yet.

He will probably delete it and deny. Just don't interact with him or meet him again. He can't respect privacy and boundaries.

So he did take a photo and my Mum said he’s now deleted it and he sends his apology. I haven’t responded. It just leads me to believe that he lacks respect for women.

He's a creep. Your poor mum - I hope she ends it with him.

Creepy fucker.

He tried to get one with you and your mum together to make it look innocent that he wanted a pic of you.

If I was your mum I'd be wondering why this man so desperately needed a pic of my DD that he had to slyly take one.

What the hell did he want it for? That's very suspect. Your poor mum.

The problem is she wouldn’t see this as a red flag, she ended an abusive relationship years ago, after years of abuse and me repeatedly telling her to leave . Her response only said he sends his apologies and he has deleted it, it said nothing more and strangely the message was without kisses which leads me to believe she thinks I’m being over the top.

This behaviour does not bode well for the future. He thinks nothing of breaking boundaries and being inappropriate. Hope your mum can see and act on it.

He may well have deleted it - but you only have his own word for that... and it seems your mother is annoyed at you?? Be careful in your next interactions with them both. 🌹

She needs proof he's deleted it from 'deleted' items.
If I was you I'd have nothing to do with him , what a creep.