My close friend of twenty years has a partner. The irony in this is that she doesn't like me and sees me as a threat. I am twenty years his senior, happily married with kids . Dowdy and spent. No threat. No feelings and zero attraction to each other.
Our friendship has suffered but we work together so we still manage our friendship but I think she is unaware and f the level of our closeness. They are together a few years. They are extremely happy and she is due her first baby soon. I've always known him to be asexual as he describes. Not an issue , just something he struggles with for many years as women would always leave him in the end.
He didn't want kids as he thought he wouldn't be able to have them and loves the singke life.
The baby is a huge shock to him as they are rarely intimate by his own words. He never wanted a family and despite saying she did, changed her mind to say she didn't either so told him she was on a fertility app and as they were mostly sexless, chances were nil.
It has been awful for her dignity as he describes it. Dressing up for him etc etc thinking it would change his libido and desire.
She will stay at all costs. I know this as at times, in my view, he has treated her appallingly.Most would run a mile.
I've lost respect for him. He maintains that now that there's a baby coming into the mix, that he seems accepting of now, that's the end of sex for him forever .she is thrilled and beyond excited about the baby.
I feel sick for her( as a married woman). Sick that she has this awful frustrating and demeaning life ahead of her.
Maybe it's because I'm married so long and sex and intimacy has been the glue that has held us together through the rough.
Why do I even feel like this? It's not even my business but he talks to me. We have fallen out before due to the way he has treated her.
I have this awful feeling that it's all going to fall apart and perhaps feel like a parent than a friend.