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Original poster

Found viagra/ED pills in DH’s sock drawer

41 replies

Betbop · 02/11/2023 17:14

Went to find some socks to borrow and hidden underneath were some Tadalafil pills for erectile disfunction. 20ml, top dose, and two taken. We’ve had sex once this week. Unsure when the other taken or why.

Don’t know how to approach DH about it. Or whether to at all. He obviously didn’t want me to find them and sort of feel bad that I did.

He’s never had a problem down there as far as I know. Very high sex drive. Also, are these pills the same as Viagra? I’m confused about the difference…

OP posts:
IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism · 02/11/2023 17:39

Viagra is sildenafil; tadalafil is a similar medicine.

Is there a dispensing label with his name on?

C1N1C · 02/11/2023 17:42

Ignore it, don’t mention it.

This is embarrassing for men.

JIMMI85 · 02/11/2023 17:43

Tadalafil is the main ingredient in Cialis. Cialis is similar to Viagra but it stays in the system for longer, up to 36 hours as opposed to Viagra which has a lifespan of 2-3 hours.

He could be using it recreationally, in order enhance his erections, or he could be taking it medically, for either physical or psychological reasons.

Personally, i wouldn't be concerned if I were in your shoes. It might make him more anxious and only make the situation worse.

Tadalafil/Cialis, comes in 4 doses. 2.5mg and 5mg to be taken daily, and 10mg and 20mg to be taken an hour before sex.

By all means approach him, but be very careful how you word things. As a man who has had issues in this department before, it is soul destroying and he will need support from you if it is not for recreational use.

JIMMI85 · 02/11/2023 17:45

IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism · 02/11/2023 17:39

Viagra is sildenafil; tadalafil is a similar medicine.

Is there a dispensing label with his name on?

You can buy both Viagra and Cialis and the generic versions ( Tadalafil in this case ) online with no prescription needed. in fact you can go into boots and buy the branded versions with no prescription as well.

nameForThis21 · 02/11/2023 17:57

Another man who here who sometimes feels like I need a little extra help due to age and stress, I tend to keep some around just in case things don’t work how they used to

Original poster
Betbop · 02/11/2023 18:37

Thanks for all the tips, especially from the men on here.

Sounds like resounding advice is to keep my nose out of it. Feel bad though — bad that he might be struggling and embarrassed. But also worried about the secret between us. Totally understand how it might be upsetting if I bring it up and don’t want to exacerbate situation by making him feel ashamed. Which he totally shouldn’t anyway — to me totally fine if he needs that, we all need help somewhere or other.

Is there a way to talk about it casually do you think? Worried it’ll come up some point or another then him knowing I’ve known for ages might be even worse…

@JIMMI85 note taken about support if medical issue and thank you so much for sharing and specifying, really helps me understand a bit more. How would you like to have been approached to talk about it, or would you have preferred not, if you don’t mind me asking?

OP posts:
IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism · 02/11/2023 18:46

JIMMI85 · 02/11/2023 17:45

You can buy both Viagra and Cialis and the generic versions ( Tadalafil in this case ) online with no prescription needed. in fact you can go into boots and buy the branded versions with no prescription as well.

Show quote history

Not the 20mg. That’s prescription only.

nameForThis21 · 02/11/2023 18:48

@Betbop
I’m not sure how you would even begin, I suppose a weekend morning conversation, saying you accidentally found his pills and is everything okay with him, and just let him talk ( or not talk)

Just suppose you needed to start using extra lubricant for any reason, how would you want to tackle that conversation?

Personally I keep them as a kind of just in case “safety net “ , maybe he is using them for the same reason?

Original poster
Betbop · 02/11/2023 19:14

Yeah maybe right @nameForThis21 . Live and let live. And really I feel no judgement at all, just a worry about the unspoken now between us…

Honestly he was a bit mad to choose the sock drawer, I steal his socks every day!

Oh also. What if the pills keep disappearing but we are not having sex 😳What then? (So far so good btw, but what if…..)

OP posts:
HT8 · 02/11/2023 19:19

He would have to be pretty stupid to be using them elsewhere and keeping them in his sock drawer!

User3735 · 02/11/2023 19:24

You say he's never had any problems with erectile dysfunction, so I'd be suspicious to his motives. I'd not say anything yet and see how often he uses them.

Daffodil18 · 02/11/2023 19:36

Betbop · 02/11/2023 19:14

Yeah maybe right @nameForThis21 . Live and let live. And really I feel no judgement at all, just a worry about the unspoken now between us…

Honestly he was a bit mad to choose the sock drawer, I steal his socks every day!

Oh also. What if the pills keep disappearing but we are not having sex 😳What then? (So far so good btw, but what if…..)

I was exactly the same and found some in his drawer. I did ask in a nice way and said it’s totally fine I get it and just be honest with me because I really don’t mind. Turns out though he was having an affair. But if you’ve got nothing to be suspicious about then it could just be because he’s embarrassed.

Oldthyme · 02/11/2023 19:44

Maybe the two missing are
1 to help his own private pleasure and then
2 for his time being intimate with you?

Bide your time. Keep your antennae up maybe?

Original poster
Betbop · 02/11/2023 19:45

@Daffodil18 Seriously?! So sorry Daffodil. What a curveball… mind now racing to be honest…

OP posts:
JIMMI85 · 02/11/2023 19:45

@IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism nope, 20mg is deffo not prescription only. At least not in the uk. I got mine online although I used 5ng daily most of the time. I can say this as I still have a stash In my bedroom which I don’t need anymore and I got them online, always from the same site.

@Betbop there isn’t a right or wrong way to approach the subject. It depends on your relationship and how you feel he would react. With me, I had another issue which caused the ED, and when I went to the urologist in london with my GF at the time he asked me if I was taking PSE5’s ( viagra and cialis ) - when I said I was my partner was upset as I didn’t tell her, but after I explained it was due to embarrassment of being 35 and having to reley on them she understood, although I wouldn’t say she was particularly supportive.

in regards to why two have been used when you have only had sex once - there are probably two reasons - If it was his first time in taking them, he may well have had a ‘test run’ before hand to check they worked and that he had no ill side effects, which often happen. Or, he might have had one and it might not have had the desired effect so he popped a second. If he had recently eaten, or had consumed alcohol then they don’t have the same effect so this is also a possibility

CameleonAreFightingBack · 02/11/2023 19:56

Or this is the first box you found but he has been using it for longer?

Onlylonelyontheinside · 02/11/2023 20:16

He wouldn’t keep them in his sock drawer if he was having an affair, probably easier to have them at hand in his bedroom..

IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism · 02/11/2023 20:32

JIMMI85 · 02/11/2023 19:45

@IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism nope, 20mg is deffo not prescription only. At least not in the uk. I got mine online although I used 5ng daily most of the time. I can say this as I still have a stash In my bedroom which I don’t need anymore and I got them online, always from the same site.

@Betbop there isn’t a right or wrong way to approach the subject. It depends on your relationship and how you feel he would react. With me, I had another issue which caused the ED, and when I went to the urologist in london with my GF at the time he asked me if I was taking PSE5’s ( viagra and cialis ) - when I said I was my partner was upset as I didn’t tell her, but after I explained it was due to embarrassment of being 35 and having to reley on them she understood, although I wouldn’t say she was particularly supportive.

in regards to why two have been used when you have only had sex once - there are probably two reasons - If it was his first time in taking them, he may well have had a ‘test run’ before hand to check they worked and that he had no ill side effects, which often happen. Or, he might have had one and it might not have had the desired effect so he popped a second. If he had recently eaten, or had consumed alcohol then they don’t have the same effect so this is also a possibility

No you are wrong. 20 mg is prescription only medicine in the U.K. You’ve either bought it illegally or you’ve had an online consultation and private prescription. https://www.chemistanddruggist.co.uk/CD136866/MHRA-reclassifies-erectile-dysfunction-tablets-for-OTC-pharmacy-purchase

MHRA reclassifies erectile dysfunction tablets for OTC pharmacy purchase

The medicines watchdog has reclassified an erectile dysfunction medication so that it can be bought over the counter at a pharmacy without a prescription, it has announced.

https://www.chemistanddruggist.co.uk/CD136866/MHRA-reclassifies-erectile-dysfunction-tablets-for-OTC-pharmacy-purchase

JIMMI85 · 02/11/2023 21:07

@IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism we’ll agree to disagree then!

i did have an online consultation, but it took all of 90 seconds before I had ordered rhe 20mg pills. I’m not sure if I’d call that a Prescription although this was a few years ago now so maybe things have changed, and they definitely weren’t from an illegal site!

@Betbop there are often tell tale signs of someone using PDE5’s such as a flushed face, dilated pupils, headache, blurred vision - maybe hang fire until you next have sex and if you see any of these signs maybe ask if he’s ok? He’ll either be honest with you or he will keep it to himself, and either answer is fine but you can then see if it was a one off or if he is regularly using them.

StarlightLady · 03/11/2023 05:52

The OP suggests he has not had any erection problems, the tablets could be why he isn’t.

l take tablets for high blood pressure, as a result my blood pressure is normal. If l stopped BP would go up; I’ve tried with GP support. I think it’s a similar issue really.

Obviously, if you are not having sex, it’s a different matter. But as you say he has a high sex drive and you don’t know how long he’s had the tablets, I don’t see a problem.

harerunner · 03/11/2023 06:23

@JIMMI85

in regards to why two have been used when you have only had sex once

The OP presumably has had sex with her DP more than once!... She just says once this week! Obviously he could have had the pills for a while, and the OP has only just discovered them.

harerunner · 03/11/2023 06:30

User3735 · 02/11/2023 19:24

You say he's never had any problems with erectile dysfunction, so I'd be suspicious to his motives. I'd not say anything yet and see how often he uses them.

I'm not sure why the fact that he hasn't had ED means there something to be suspicious about. That would imply that he needs it for his affair partner but not for sex with the OP, which doesn't make sense.

Why would he be having an affair with someone that he was so unattracted to that he needed pills, when clearly he had
no physical need and was perfectly able to perform with the OP - it makes no sense.

category12 · 03/11/2023 06:35

Why would he be having an affair with someone that he was so unattracted to that he needed pills, when clearly he hadno physical need and was perfectly able to perform with the OP - it makes no sense.**

It wouldn't be because he's not attracted, it would be to enhance his performance to reduce his refractory period and to ensure he can maintain his erections longer.

Thisthingwedo · 03/11/2023 06:41

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

harerunner · 03/11/2023 07:13

category12 · 03/11/2023 06:35

Why would he be having an affair with someone that he was so unattracted to that he needed pills, when clearly he hadno physical need and was perfectly able to perform with the OP - it makes no sense.**

It wouldn't be because he's not attracted, it would be to enhance his performance to reduce his refractory period and to ensure he can maintain his erections longer.

Ok, that makes sense - I was clearly being naive.