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Original poster

My friend asked her partner if he was gay

27 replies

magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 17:58

My friend, lives separately to her partner. He spends a lot of time gaming with his newly male close friend. Raves about how he's helped him. Showers there as he has no access to showers. Has high things to say about him, but treats her like crap.
He seems to spend more time with his new friend than he does with her. Last weekend, she wanted to see him, he had to choose between his friend and her. Reluctantly choose her, but said to her, you'd give me crap if I choose him, so I might aswell see you.

Yesterday she asked him outright if he prefers him to her. His response was- I am not gay.
Blocked her. Is this a worry. Or just bromance?

OP posts:
EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 04/10/2023 18:03

Well as he's blocked her, it sounds like the relationship is done anyway.

Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:06

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 04/10/2023 18:03

Well as he's blocked her, it sounds like the relationship is done anyway.

He's done this a few times. Block her then unblock her

OP posts:
MintyCedric · 04/10/2023 18:07

Not by not be gay but he’s clearly a prick and she’s well shot of him.

IncompleteSenten · 04/10/2023 18:08

More fool her for not dumping him really. When he unblocks her instead of her going back for more, she should block him and move on.

CheekyHobson · 04/10/2023 18:13

The first time someone I was in a relationship with blocked me would also be the last time they blocked me.

He may or may not be gay but he doesn’t seem to care much for women and that’s the more relevant issue for your friend.

minipie · 04/10/2023 18:14

Newly male?? As in, actually female?

Anyway, agree the gay thing is a red herring, he treats her like crap and that’s a good enough reason to be rid.

theduchessofspork · 04/10/2023 18:16

Well she needs to get shot of him regardless.

Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:16

IncompleteSenten · 04/10/2023 18:08

More fool her for not dumping him really. When he unblocks her instead of her going back for more, she should block him and move on.

I agree. Hopefully she listens

OP posts:
Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:18

minipie · 04/10/2023 18:14

Newly male?? As in, actually female?

Anyway, agree the gay thing is a red herring, he treats her like crap and that’s a good enough reason to be rid.

A new male friend. He spends more time with than her.

OP posts:
Goldfish41 · 04/10/2023 18:22

Did she ask if he was gay, or did she ask if he prefers him and he responded without prompting that he’s not gay? If the latter, it seems that is something in his mind.

Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:23

Goldfish41 · 04/10/2023 18:22

Did she ask if he was gay, or did she ask if he prefers him and he responded without prompting that he’s not gay? If the latter, it seems that is something in his mind.

She asked if he prefers him to her

OP posts:
Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:24

Goldfish41 · 04/10/2023 18:22

Did she ask if he was gay, or did she ask if he prefers him and he responded without prompting that he’s not gay? If the latter, it seems that is something in his mind.

This was the message she sent

My friend asked her partner if he was gay
OP posts:
Hillrunning · 04/10/2023 18:24

It really doesn't matter if he is gay or not. He doesn't much like her so she should end the relationship. Simple.

YouJustDoYou · 04/10/2023 18:24

Too much immature drama. Drop him. Move on to better men.

Loubelle70 · 04/10/2023 18:27

Theres other indicators if he is gay, only he knows though. I had a relationship with a guy, he rarely initiated sex, hated to give oral, had severe E.D...etc..not saying this is 'oh he must be gay'... there's other reasons. In my case he did come out eventually. I knew he was. Had a feeling.

Lovemusic82 · 04/10/2023 18:27

Your friend sounds like an idiot for dating him in the first place, sounds like he’s got no life other than gaming with his mate, why would she want to be with someone like that? She should be blocking him. They both sound like they are 15 years old.

Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:28

Loubelle70 · 04/10/2023 18:27

Theres other indicators if he is gay, only he knows though. I had a relationship with a guy, he rarely initiated sex, hated to give oral, had severe E.D...etc..not saying this is 'oh he must be gay'... there's other reasons. In my case he did come out eventually. I knew he was. Had a feeling.

It's the same with her. She's become insecure, because his "sex drive" has gone.
He moaned at her for messaging early in the morning, because he'd been at his mates till early morning

OP posts:
Original poster
magicallySparkle88 · 04/10/2023 18:30

Loubelle70 · 04/10/2023 18:27

Theres other indicators if he is gay, only he knows though. I had a relationship with a guy, he rarely initiated sex, hated to give oral, had severe E.D...etc..not saying this is 'oh he must be gay'... there's other reasons. In my case he did come out eventually. I knew he was. Had a feeling.

He also said to her once knowing she liked a celeb, that he wasn't a bad looking guy

OP posts:
LightSpeeds · 04/10/2023 18:31

Blimey. His behaviour's enough of a giveaway that he can't be arsed with her (gay or not).

She should just dump his arse!

LakeTiticaca · 04/10/2023 18:50

Straight or gay he's still a twat. She needs to bin him and find a man who respects her

KirstHD1 · 04/10/2023 22:54

It does not matter whether he is gay, he obviously prefers his male friend more!

hotblacktea · 04/10/2023 22:58

how old are all of you ? this all sounds very immature

why is she still with this arsehole

sazzaz1980 · 04/10/2023 23:24

hotblacktea · 04/10/2023 22:58

how old are all of you ? this all sounds very immature

why is she still with this arsehole

Edited

Agreed! Let your friend get on with it. It’s quite clear she isn’t happy and her boyfriend has no respect for her

Steev · 04/10/2023 23:41

You know a lot about your friend. Is it you, asking for yourself? Just dump him.

ChristmasFluff · 05/10/2023 10:03

She's focussing on the wrong thing. He's just not that into her, so she needs to dump him, or accept being treated like crap til he finds someone else.