Do people date this much?

[Curiousbeancat]

I met a guy who divorced two years ago

He’s had 5 actual girlfriends in this time

1st gf was a recovering drug addict so he dumped at 3 months
2nd gf dumped him at 3 months
3rd gf he didn’t have a spark for, so dumped 3 months
4th gf was 6 months and he ended it out of
nowhere
5th gf is a few weeks along now

He has slept with over 40 women in two years

is this a lot? Or what dating is like now with unlimited options?

It's nightmare just reading about him, it's like walking towards oncoming headlights and ignoring it. He's only satisfied with short term flings, it's not worked out with his ex wife or any other encounter since, not even fussy who with who by the sounds of it

This is very true. An "itch" tends to go off at this stage with most men, where you're either committing or not.

This "itch" works both ways tbh... Women have it too!

True. Very valid. Thanks for the correction ;)

My hairdresser is a very savvy 27 year old, and is ‘seeing’ three people, one more seriously than the others, and the only one she’s sleeping with, and also actively dating. To me it sounds kind of time-consuming, but everyone knows about everyone else, she has excellent boundaries, and by the time she decides to be exclusive and enter a relationship, she’ll have done a fair amount of sampling of who’s out there.

Even if

If he cheated on his wife too then it sounds like he likes the chase and won’t ever be happy in a monogamous long term relationship. I would leave him be tbh.

I used to be known for my 7 week itch! I was 23 before anyone got past 7 weeks 😂

I did OLD since I split from now XH. I did wait 8 months before I took the plunge. I got cancelled on/ghosted 7 times before I got an actual date! But I did try two dates in one weekend and honestly, I hated it! Couldn’t recall what I’d said to who! Found a nice fella in the end.

Honestly OP, I’d be very wary of a man who openly admits to that kind of history who is now saying he ‘sees a future with you’. Odds are in the future he’ll either get itchy at 3 months or cheat..but he’ll turn around and say ‘But I was honest about it all from the early days’. He’s telling you who he is! Believe him!

Well hope the next 3 months are worth it OP as hes openly shown you who he is and that 3 months is his level

Run

He sounds like a serial dater desperately trying to distract himself from the boredom or dissatisfaction in life with a revolving belt of women. And also someone who is insecure and struggles to be by himself. I’d find all that deeply unattractive.

all those relationships and flings are excessive considering he was married until fairly recently.

And the biggest red flag is the fact he cheated on his wife. I wouldn’t even consider someone once they’d told me that, but at least he was honest.

Yes, people do date like this. Dp told me when he split from his ex-wife he went on hundreds of dates. At one point he was multi-dating half a dozen different women.
I also have female colleagues who are having a fun time dating.

Seems perfectly normal to me! I wouldn’t see this as a red flag. Looks like my dating history before I found current DP who has been long term (minus the drug addict thankfully!)

Oh sorry, just RTFT (I feel like you should have included key facts like 3 dates a DAY in your first post, talk about drip feed 😂). I revise my answer to yes 3 dates a day is a red flag and if he cheated on ex wife that would be biggest red flag for me, but some factors would come in to play in if that was a deal breaker - there is nuance there and at least he was honest about it which is good sign. Only you can follow your instincts about whether he is a good guy or not.