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Original poster

Weird comment from partner...

35 replies

Finallyseptember · 12/09/2023 11:24

What would you make of this? It's been bugging me.
I am pregnant, my bump is huge on my small frame.
Partner said as I was looking at it in the mirror, "it's like your admiring it"
And not in a nice or jokey way.

OP posts:
Coffeeandanap · 12/09/2023 11:31

Sounds jealous to me, pathetic comment in the context of you saying it wasn’t said in a nice tone. How’s he been for the rest of your pregnancy?

MariePaperRoses · 12/09/2023 11:35

Why wouldn't you admire your physique whilst pregnant and marvel at how you are sustaining the life of another through your own body?

Perhaps your ignorant partner doesn't understand how pregnancy works and just thinks you've got fat and the Stork drops the baby off at the end.

WandaWonder · 12/09/2023 11:36

Coffeeandanap · 12/09/2023 11:31

Sounds jealous to me, pathetic comment in the context of you saying it wasn’t said in a nice tone. How’s he been for the rest of your pregnancy?

I get odd maybe but why jealous?

MariePaperRoses · 12/09/2023 11:40

Show Dumbo this video so he can see how wondrous your body is and then perhaps he might start admiring your belly.

%3D%3D
Original poster
Finallyseptember · 12/09/2023 11:43

He's not been the best we have argued but ok now, it was planned. But he's never rubbed my bump or been bothered feeling kicks. He will have a quick glance if I say.

He once said it goes through him as he's squeamish

OP posts:
MariePaperRoses · 12/09/2023 11:44

What a drip!

He needs to man up as when the baby arrives there will be snot, poo, wee and sick that he will have to cope with and help clean up.

SallySunrise · 12/09/2023 11:45

So what if you were admiring it?

I was massive with both my pregnancies but I loved seeing my bump grow.

MariePaperRoses · 12/09/2023 11:45

Don't have him there at the birth as he is going to be utterly useless and probably will act like a big baby, demanding the attention is on him.

Go it alone or take your mother/sister/best friend for support.

SlippinJanie · 12/09/2023 11:46

Nasty thing to say.

pinkyredrose · 12/09/2023 11:49

He's not been the best

What do you mean by this?

mosiacmaker · 12/09/2023 11:52

If I had a bump I would admire it all day long and expect my DP to admire it too!!

he sounds horrid

SleepingStandingUp · 12/09/2023 11:52

He sounds like a dick.

It? Your bump? The baby? Either way not nice to refer so dismissively to it as an IT.

Also I looked at my massive bump all the time. I LOVED it. I loved being huge and swaying down the street. I took some on photos so I'd never forget how huge I was. I admired it because my body was AMAZING growing so huge to grow these two little lives from just one egg and sperm into millions of cells, all identical but each doing their own things.

I'd have replied "hell yes, and so should you!!"

PaintedEgg · 12/09/2023 11:52

what an asshole, of course you'd be right to admire your pregnant body!

im in my 9th month now, my belly is huge! i look so alien and weird but in the best way possible

if my husband said something like this my reply would be heard on the other side of the town

Tiny2018 · 12/09/2023 11:55

I'm going with previous OP, I think he's jealous of the amount of attention you're paying your baby already. May become resentful when 'it' arrives.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 12/09/2023 11:58

He sounds like a dick and one at that who is upset that his position of he getting all the attention in your life is being usurped by this as yet unborn child. How else does he treat you day to day?.

I would seriously consider giving this child your surname going forward, certainly not his.

AnIndianWoman · 12/09/2023 11:59

He sounds like an arse. Has he made other disparaging comments?

grenadeapple · 12/09/2023 12:04

So you’ll have no bump pregnancy photos then, I assume?

That was a nasty thing to say from someone who will soon have a baby but hasn’t had to deal with any of it. Squemish my arse..

MissHarrietBede · 12/09/2023 12:10

Why did he want a baby?

Lackinginspiration1 · 12/09/2023 12:19

I loved my bump when pregnant but my dh wasn’t really that fussed - I guess it would have been nice to have the “goddess mother of my child” reaction but nope, he didn’t really connect all that much with it. He did when the baby actually arrived though!

ZadocPDederick · 12/09/2023 12:20

Have you asked him what he meant?

ZadocPDederick · 12/09/2023 12:21

Finallyseptember · 12/09/2023 11:43

He's not been the best we have argued but ok now, it was planned. But he's never rubbed my bump or been bothered feeling kicks. He will have a quick glance if I say.

He once said it goes through him as he's squeamish

He's not going to be a tower of strength at the birth, is he?

Original poster
Finallyseptember · 12/09/2023 12:23

No, but I will ask him as its been bugging Me ever since @ZadocPDederick

I thought I overthinking it due to being hormonal

OP posts:
BetsyBobbins · 12/09/2023 12:34

I'd reply, "Yes I am. And your point is...?"

MariePaperRoses · 12/09/2023 12:42

You might be feeling emotional because of your hormones. But don't let him sap your strength.

I bet he would sit around crying all day if he was the one who was pregnant.

Don't let him undermine you.

He should be proud of your strength and supporting the changes in your body as your baby is nourished by your body and grows inside of you.

shearwater · 12/09/2023 12:43

Some men really don't like pregnant bodies. I don't think DH did and wasn't up for sex at all when I was pregnant but knew better than to say anything disparaging. He didn't rub my tummy or count kicks, but I didn't really like people touching the bump anyway, it did feel really odd to me, like touching my belly button. And actually men who say "We're pregnant" and get over-involved give me the ick anyway. He was great at the births though and is a good dad.

What your DH said is really unpleasant though- is he often like that? Why shouldn't you admire the way you are growing a human?