Splitting finances - what's fair? I'm confused.

[S2P78]

Hello,
Prepared to be told I'm not thinking straight here/being fair. But I own the house that my partner lives in (outright) with me. We've been living together for two years. I earn about 45k (but I'm freelance so it varies) and he earns about 90k (more stable employed income). We each pay the same amount so 50/50 into a joint account for bills, and he gives me a small amount in 'rent' each month (a v small amount compared to what he'd actually pay if he was a lodger or housemate).
I pay for any rennovations/repairs etc and there have been loads since he moved in. I set up a cohabitation agreement to state that this was my responsibility as it's my house/asset.
He says as I have more assets that him we shouldn't split the amount we pay into the joint account on a percentage basis, but I slightly feel why should I be penalised for having the asset (house) that he's benefiting from (living in - he was living in a one bed flat he rents out now). I'm not sure if I'm being unfair though. To stick 50/50 into joint account in this scenario or increase his share a little as he earns double, or isn't this fair?
Thank you.

...hoping to get some responses to this. I guess I just feel that while I'm the 'asset rich' one with a house bought using inheritance (though he does own a nice flat), our different salaries should play a part in how much we each pay towards bills, but maybe he's right that it should still be 50/50 (and he pays a v small 'rent' too). Thanks

He should be paying 66% and you 33% - in proportion to your incomes IMO. He can use what he would have been paying in rent to fund a second property if he wants, especially as he already owns a flat he has equal assets.

Otherwise he is a legendary MN cocklodger...

If he starts paying more rent he might want to be put on the deeds bearing in mind hell
be contributing to your mortgage

Personally I would go 50/50 on bills etc just to make it clear if you were to split that you have in no way benefited from him financially and therefore he couldn't ask for anything from you or have any claim in your assets altho realistically if you're not married and you have cohabitation agreement already Im probably just being paranoid (ex was a cocklodger lol) 😅😅

I would expect my partner to want us both to have similar disposable incomes after essentials are paid for, but equally if hes the type to remind you/make an issue of him paying more then I would just think nah lets go 50/50

Sorry probably not much help 🙈

I’d keep it 50/50- two grown adults with no dependents, pay your way.

Also I think it sounds really nasty to say he’s benefitting living with you, surely you benefit from living with him too.

I would be charging him a reasonable rent. Just because you own the house and assets, doesn't mean he gets to live practically rent free. 50/50 on bills and then work out what a reasonable rent on top of this would be - not necessarily half of the mortgage. Perhaps gets some legal advice about any potential claim he may have but I believe he can only claim if he has contributed significant sums to renovations etc (I'm not an expert).

In this situation, I would expect him to pay 2/3 of your household expenses and you 1/3 in proportion to your incomes. I wouldn't be having him pay 'rent' as you are mortgage free, but he can then use his savings to save up to invest in property of his own so that he can build his own equity.

In the longer term, you can discuss if you want to buy a property together. But that depends on how long you've been together and where you see life together in the future.

If I were him I would want to be saving or investing in my own asset eg a buy to let so i think his view is fair. If you split he would be starting with nothing. And I also wouldn’t take ‘rent’ as that risks him being able to claim he’s contributed to the house and repairs. I would stick with just a fair split of bills excluding repairs.

In your situation I would pay mortgage, building insurance and major house repairs from your account. Everything else, council tax, water, gas, electricity, content’s insurance, food, furniture, holidays, presents, should be 66/33 so you both proportionally contribute according to earnings. I know that would mean he is living with you rent free, but I have seen too many friends get burned to risk an interest in the property.

I find it bizarre that the consensus is he shouldn’t benefit from not paying rent but she should benefit from proportionately splitting the bills- talk about having your cake.

I disagree with the above that he should pay more bills as he earns more, given you are both unmarried with no dc.

He is half the adults in a house with 2x full time working adults so should oay half the bills. Plus a small amount (say 200pcm) rent. I'd make sure this isn't near the halfway mark for the mortgage repayments.

You pay everything to do with the capital of the house (mortgage, insurances, repairs) and his rental contribution excludes his need to pay any of these as or is your asset.

I think he's on to a winner paying 50%of bills in a a house owned outright by you and earning double your salary. I'd want to know what's happening to his money on that salary with little outgoings? He ought to be asset rich in investments if he isn't squandering it. Thanks to you subsidising him!

Do you benefit from the income he gets from
his flat that he rents out?
50/50 on bills on your home is fair imo.

I totally agree with this. He should have a lot of money available to save and invest, however he wishes, so that if you split, he could support himself.

@BoohooWoohoo no his rental income on his flat covers most of his mortgage there.

Sorry, I can’t work out exactly he is unhappy about -do you want him to pay more than 50-50 for bills and he’s not happy about that?

As a general rule i’d say 50-50 on bills.

For the house itself, as you want to retain the full asset value, I would suggest he pays half of the mortgage interest payment excluding the capital element.

I think 50:50 is right. If his income went down to £30k I'd say the same.

If you were married or had kids then it would be different.

He's in a vulnerable position as you could eject him at a moment's notice. He needs to have a chunk of cash at hand for rent/deposit should it all go wrong.

@Paq thanks, see your point but he owns a property himself so he would just move back into that if we split. I get he's in a vulnerable position though as I can ask him to move out of my house if it all went wrong.

I think 50/50 is always fair and anythjng someone wants to spend over that is coming out of their own pocket. The thing that's variable is your incomes but the thing that's not variable is external prices. People don't pay less for milk because they earn less

Assume he couldn't get rid of his tenant at a moment's notice? He's responsible for the upkeep of his place, as you are for yours.

Genuinely, if he earned £30k would you want to pay more than him on bills? Or if you moved into his place would you expect to pay less than half?

I don't think he is in a vulnerable position but I think he doesn't see the point of paying higher rent to you when he owns a flat. You are his partner not his landlord.

I think 50/50 is correct on bills, just because he earns more than you, why should he subsidy your living costs?

maybe he should pay you a small amount of rent, but maybe he could help out with the renovations a bit ?

Him living with you has increased your council tax as you no longer get the single person discount.

He is also causing wear and tear on your house but you are solely covering all repairs.

I think a proportion split would be fairer.

DP and I are about to be in the same situation. We'll split bills (including groceries) 50/50 but I won't charge him any rent as a) I don't want him to have any claim to the house at this juncture and b) I'm not entirely sure it would be fair to charge rent, given my mortgage would be the same if he was living there or not. But my situation is slightly different in that I have a child and in contributing to the bills he is paying towards her upkeep.

The council tax thing is not true, the discount is only 25%, so it if goes back up to full & he pays 1/2 the OP is still better off.
same as other fixed bills like Netflix/ broadband etc the OP will be better off by halving them ,

but agreed about wear & tear a small amount of rent should cover that